General Chat

Ann I'm watching! Hope Joyce is!! xx

Hi gang

I hadn't forgotten you all just been very busy painting and gardening .

Liz I wish I could send you my football pitch I never get a rest from it .Cut the grass back and front last weekend and had to do it again today .Thats me just had my breakfast at 4pm .
Will have to go back out and do some more weeding .
My neighbour has a gardener and her garden is always so tidy it makes mine look scruffy .
My next house is going to have a window box !!!
Feeling a bit lost this weekend neighbour on one side has gone to London and the other side have gone away as well .Still I have smokey for company when he is not sleeping
Will be the anniversary of my dear dad's passing tomorrow .I will make an effort to go to church and I might even get a message ( spiritualist church ) My sister always goes to the place we scattered his ashes but I don't see the point as he is all around not still sitting on that rock 18 miles away .

Wavey sorry that you are finding things so difficult I hope things get better for you .
Carole do you gave a chart with everyone's names on it ? if not how do you manage it
Y Caz glad to see you are back .You take it easy and do as you are told
Ann glad you had a good holiday
Deanna you are great at remembering everyone as well .What is your trick ?

I did my stint at the fms yesterday and boy were we busy . One lady I helped from Canada was researching a Smith married to a Smith !!!
I managed to get 4 generations back on both sides and she didn't even smile .I would have been doing cart wheels if it had been me many years ago when I first started .
Exact opposite was a mother and daughter from the States who were so delighted to get what I found for them .We are lucky here in Scotland to get instant access to certificates so it makes reseach so much quicker .

Well to all who I have not mentioned hope you have a good weekend and are feeling better.

love
Kathy xxx

Kathy.... I cheat.
I read all the page and when I am typing, I go up and down the page to see who I think needs an answer most.... so that is them remembered, and thought about.
then when I am trying to say *I love you and appreciate you all for being here for me* I think of the ones I've missed. It comes easier after a while when we have become used to each other.
Many names stick in my mind because of their special worry or pain... and then I just send a message to all the ones I may have forgotten.
At first I used to write down who was in a bad way so that I would not answer the wrong person and match her to the wrong problem. It got easier.... My big problem is the new people who join in.
I don't mean to miss anyone out, but at the minute Angela is the one who sits in my mind most of the day, bless her and her lovely man.

I have had an e-mail from Mary, so she must be okay... but she is working and looking after her grandchildren and now..... her garden.
She will be back I'm sure.
Joyce P is worrying me as I have not seen her around and had no PM from her lately.
There again we all need time off and if we are ill, it is often too much to be able to come on the boards.

Well we watched the film and MONK, does anyone watch that?
Allan fell asleep before the film, but woke up to watch it. We had our coffee and our walnut cake.....
None of you turned up... so we have some left for tomorrow.;-0)
Then Allan went back to bed!!!

Liz, we have a Clematis which grows all over Allan's shed. It is in bloom now and it looks beautiful, he planted it when we moved in about 12 years ago and trained it to cover the top of the shed.
We have birds which come back year after year and rebuild their nests and have their babies!
Our biggest summertime job is SHOOING the cats from the Clematis.... they are obviously not coming to admire it.... ha ha ha
There is one big ginger cat.... and he is afraid of NOTHING.... so He is our biggest worry. takes more than a HISS out of the window to shift him. He needs to hear the back door opening... then he moves.
I can hear him thinking.... *do they think I'm afraid??? * *I'LL BE BACK....* ;-0)

Thank God and whoever thought about it ... for this thread where we can come and moan, or chat and pour out our feelings.

Did this practically one handed.... although I have just taken a pain killer... so it is a little better.

COME IN JOYCE P..... WE ARE NEAR THE 3000..... XX

Good night folks and please look after yourselves.
love to all,
Deanna XX

To my watchdogs Carole, AnnG and Deanna, thank you for caring....if for some reason I happen to miss out on the 3000th posting, may I delegate this honour to any of you three deserving lasses, with my love.

I have had a most unusual week so far, a little topsy turvy, which has thrown me somewhat!

I promise to reveal all tomorrow when hopefully I shall have no distractions.

Deanna, please give Allan my regards lass, sorry he is not too well... and you take a break from typing and give your arm a rest, okay xxxx

Bye for now all,

love JoyceP xxxxx

Hi gang, and yes Deanna I have been resting. Joyce is ok, was speaking to her on phone this morning, talk about laugh. She has had a busy week galivanting but I will let her tell you, she is also going out tonight to a party....one of the old mens birthdays in the community hall.
Your poor hands Deanna, I know how mine are sometimes and I can't type, but it's my fingers.

I only came on to tell you I am feeling better although a bit sore and bruised but it is the shock that's worse I think.

Talking about gardens, when we arrived home from hospital on Wednesday there was a big space in next doors garden where three big sycamore trees had been. The men were still putting all the wood in the lorry. I said to hubby that we could do with them to sort our trees out so he went and had a word with them. In 2-3 weeks they are coming back to take our line of conifers, about 20, down by half and trim them back. Then to cut three flowering cherries, a silver birch and the rowans back, they said the other trees are ok. What a relief, the garden is getting a bit wild now with me not being able to do it. When hubby gets home from work he has to do the h****w*** that I can't do so doesn't have time for garden.

It was Carole who started the thread Deanna but I don't think she could have thought in a hundred years what it would turn into. A lifeline for us all, thank you Carole, you deserve a medal.

Well a short message this was supposed to be.

Love and hugs to you all

Caz xx

JOYCE........... so glad to see you love.

No , you will be the 3000 th... so get well if you are not feeling too great.
will pass on your wishes to Allan.

good night love.XX

And to all of you too
Deanna XX

Didn't know you had posted Joyce, I broke off typing to have a cuppa so it took from 5-30 to get it sent lol. Hope I haven't let secrets out.

Caz xx

Hi

I am fine at the moment. I have just asked for second opinions on an illegitimacy and they reckon that the man who married the mum was the real dad as she was then baptised as his natural child. Also they wouldnt lie in church and have her baptised as his if she wasnt because the family were churchgoers.

My OCD has dwindled a lot but I have been having a few self harming worries. I do obsess over my breathing, and I sometimes gently feel the pulse on my neck near the chin. I get unwanted temptations to press hard on it though . Would doing that cause any damage at all as I worry whether I am going to press hard on my pulse with my fingers.

Ben

hello
just a quick note to say I am still reading the thread, can't seem to find an answer to some of my problems and that is keeping me depressed.

Try again tomorrow

Take care evryone.
Gill

Hello Ben,

Lots of people get urges to self harm, you have to get them under control using diversion tactics. Do you have something around the house you can throw or beat with your fists? Sounds silly but it will be a release until the urge fades.

Do NOT press on any pulse in your neck, you could have a stroke!

If you get really depressed come on here and post, someone will be here.

Sue x

Hello dear friends, sorry Deanna and Liz I've been awol but am OK now. Pushed myself to go outside this morning, a lovely day, came in with my cheeks bright red - not sure if sun or wind - feeling absolutely exhausted in a good way. Our house sits on a lot which is 84'x142', a double lot compared to others on the road. I picked up a secondhand electric lawnmower at the end of last summer, and by Jove, it works. I gave away my 2 gas powered mowers because the strain of pulling the cord to start them had become too much for me. It took almost 4 hours for me to cut the lawn (and the dandelions) but I took my time, took some breaks to sit in the shade,Colleen & I moved the shed, and moved about 2 dozen large rocks to edge one part of the garden. I cannot believe how much better it looks.
Unfortunately we had some excitement (as per usual). Colleen's back door is at the top of a 2-storey outside staircase, there's a little porch at the top. I looked up and here was Gareth, had pushed 2 boxes to the railing and was on top of them above the railing. mercifully he responded when I shrieked at him and got down and came down the stairs. Not 10 minutes later I looked up and Sarah was straddling the top of the railing, 2 storeys up. She was giggling and I was petrified!!
All safe and now asleep, thank goodness.
this morning I took the 3 girls,Mary,Sarah and Em to a garden centre where they were doing a children's seminar, as tomorrow is Mothers Day here, they were provided with a nice flower pot, with paint to make a design on the outside, and soil and their choice of plants for each one to create a Mother's Day planter for their Mum.They were each allowed 3 good-sized plants. MiniMary was a huge help with Sarah, who wanted to finger paint everything but the pot!!!
Colleen presented me this afternoon with a HUGE gorgeous fuschia, little did she know that was my grandmother's favourtie plant, and this particular one, red flower with purple centre, happens to be my fav.
I've hung it from the overhang of the front porch and it looks lovely.
Thanks for all the concern and good wishes, I did have 3 really bad days this week but seem to be Ok today.
Take care of yourselves - and each other. I'm off to sit in the Jacuzzi before bed.
hugs
Mary

Hi Mary, phew, glad you are ok, but it is never dull in your neck of the woods, is it lol? Maybe you need to fill that gap in the porch with trellis or something to stop any further climbing?
Your garden will be wonderful soon, wish I could send you a package of plants, I have so many spare grasses of all kinds, and hues, and lots of little viola/violet plants as well as other stuff that needs a home.
Also think I have a leafcutter bee as on Friday I had a tall stem with a bud on my peony, and this morning the stem was bent over and some of the leaves had big holes chomped out of the sides as did a viburnum in another pot nearby. I was so cross about the bud as it was the only one on there! Just hope more will grow but it was such a shame.
I have a fuchsia, two shades of pink with a big flower. When I first went to stay with my cousin in Buckingham we went to the nearby village where she and my Dad were brought up, in fact several generations had lived there, and on the way called into a reclamation yard where they were selling small plants too. I bought two fuchsias as my Dad always loved them but sadly one died when I had to take it on to another destination from my cousin, and it got scorched cos the weather was so hot. However, three years on, one of them is doing well so now whenever I water it or catch a glimpse of it, I will think of you Mary and your plant.
Have a lovely Mother's Day, hope Colleen is pleased with her pots the girls did.
Off for an earlyish night so take care, Mary and all who come on here later today.
love
Lizxx

just stumble across this thread and want to say well done for bringing this subject out in the open.

I suffer from depression as do my mum and my sister i like one of the other posters take 1 venlaflaxine a day and have tried twice to come off them but found life is just so much better with them so happy to carry on taking them.
I am lucky in that i have a wonderful supportive husband.
My sister on the other hand is on her own and wont ask for the help she so desperately needs choosing to try and blot out her problems with drink. I have tried to help her but she just seems hell bent on pushing the self destruct button.

Hi WhiteNancy, so glad you have support from your husband and hope one day your sister will seek the help she needs too. You are doing the best you can for yourself and for her, and if she can't accept your help there is not a lot you can do, so hope you don't feel guilty about it or anything. Hope she finds a better way through her depression soon.
Keep popping in on here and you will find many lovely people who will talk with you.
Off to bed in a mo,
take care, goodnight,
Lizx

Sorry for not posting recently, have read most of the messages though.
I have been feeling really out of sorts for nearly two weeks now,it has affected me very badly.
Take care everyone and be happy.

Eileen x

Nice to hear from you Eileen but there's no need for apologies on here love.
We all get down at times and I know how hard it is, I'm like that at the moment. Although I haven't been on here much lately I think about you all every day.
Just keep popping in to let us know how you are.
A big hug for you 'cause I think you need it.

Caz xx

Ben,

I hope you are looking in. I don't know whether the pms last night helped you or not.

Please come back onto the boards and talk with other people who may be able to help you more than I could.

Sue x

Hi Sue

Yes thanks the pms did help last night. It is just OCD that is making me want to self harm. I think it is the thought of pressing on a pulse and passing out or even having a stoke and being severely disbled afterwards.

It is OK to gently touch the pulse area but no harder.

Ben

Hello Ben,

Thank goodness I was really worried about you. Come back here as often as you need to :-))

If you have the compulsion to just feel your pulse, fine but please don't do anything more than that.

I think you are doing really well, at least you are posting your feelings, that's a lot more than others are able to do.

Stick with it, we are all here for you.

Sue x

I dont think my family knew how bad I was and now that the penny has dropped they are spending more time with me..... going to try to go to the car-boot sale today,but not sure about the crowds of people....
did'nt sleep much last night, my brain would not shut ddown and my body is very painful,trying to feel positive about things, but its hard.....................at least the sun is shinning........love to everyone .......