General Chat

Fat Lady, how could you be sooo cruel lol, Muck is what I had for dinner, Burnt Beef does not appeal to my pallet, where is the Sushi Bar? Has any one found a job for me yet?? Lady M

ATTENTION, ATTENTION! This is the Admiral speaking! We are about to go into a safe harbour on the first of the Cape Verde islands: SS Utopia sustained quite a bit of damage due to the gales and storms last night so we need to assess how this damage has affected our Cruise. Please feel free to leave the ship and do some sight-seeing or shopping. Please return by 9.00pm, by which time I hope that Mommylonglegs (The Purser) and David (Security Guard) and myself will have an idea of whether we can contininue our Cruise or whether we need to re-assess our situation and fly back to Southampton. If you wish to comment, one or the other, please do so. I will see you all later. Enjoy yourselves!

Fat cook I'm on my way with my donker, keep that waste of space crocodile out of my way or he'll get it too, you'll have to get some mouse traps when i've sorted this one out. Warning ladies on inspecting the ladies toilets, (in the course of my duties) i saw two huge spiders disappear down the one of the pans. David (security ) Ha Ha be very Afraid

Evening all we do not seem to have a page fourteen! I wonder why? MENU Light everning meal for everbody as there was so much left overs from that delicious lunch that I have decided to present cold meats and salads, Blackberry Pie with a wine black berry sauce. Gooseberies and cream Tea and coffee. Wine of your choice.. Crew: The same as the rest of the paying passengers but please do not get used to the idea as it only happens on a Sunday. No Wine! Tomorrow is a working day! Lady Anne you know the procedure. Where is that damn vet.. I need to take care of that precious stone of lady Muuc..k oops RICH LADY. FAT LADY

The bar is open until we are given our instructions by Dorathy and Jenny. Viv A.L.

Has Boris had his tooth seen to yet. If not sack that dentist, cowardly thing. By the way need more wine. Maggie

Mommylonglegs: I am really fed up with this board!!!! It's all over the place! Will speak to you later: hope you see this!

ATTENTION: Admiral speaking: It seems we still have problems with communications on board! Therefore,w e shall stay in port until tomorrow. We resume our damage assessment overnight. We still have he cargo for the Portuguese Ambassador to deliver: as we don't know what this parcel contains, I would be grateful if David, our Secuirty Officer will look at it and decide if it is safe! Speak to you all later.

Hi Maggie, Coming up with two bottles of wine to drown our sorrows. The vet did not appear and I am really getting p****d off as Boris is very Grumpy. Lady Muck want's her spaklers back and page fourteen is missing. Dorothy, The board has been so slow this pm that it has been impossible to get on. I do not recall anything on page fourteen that would have warrented being deleted by GR. I think that this is still teething problems and has nothing to do with our virtual voyage otherwise they would have said something by now. Could I suggest that once again when u have the new passanger list that we start another thread. Just a suggestion! FAT LADY

page 14 is there its out of sinc with the rest of the pages, dont worry about it and carry on Maggie

Lindy and Margaret: thanks for that encouragement! I was getting a bit of a Persecution complex! Hopefully Mommylonglegs and I will be able to see which passengers are on board either later or tomorrow: Are you all enjoying visiting this island, or have you just stayed on board in the Bar....or whereever?

Ive been on the Island collecting plants and seeds and stuff. Am now in the bar stocking up on wine Maggie

Admiral, Maggie and I have decided to stay on board as we are afraid someone might hurt Boris as he has one Lady Mucks..oops Marmelade's jewel's stuck in his teeth and we are afraid that someone might try to use Physical force. WE are having our own little party at the bar if the Admiral would care to join us. I have taped Boris's jaw shut so he will not take a nip. As far as the ladies of the night are concerned they have all gone ashore and hopefully, they will forget to board before we sail in the morning..."Grin" ;-)) The rest of the problems.. which are of no concern to this voyage has been left off of this thread and I trust that the Admiral will agree. Your servant COOK, THE FAT LADY

This a very nice wine Lindy....Boris baby, hows that nasty tooth, why hasnt that bad nasty dentist been to see you. Are you going to spit that nasty stone out and give it to me and Lindy. Maggie

HI Lindy and Margaret: THank you for the invitation, but I shall have an earlier night tonight, so that I am more rested than I was last night! Glad you've got Boris secure! Did the vet not turn up to remove Strump's rocks? Good to hear you've got more supplies on board Margaret, that was good thinking on your part: did you find any unusual plants etc. on the island. Would be nice to have something different to eat tomorrow: perhaps you could rustle something exotic up for Lunch tomorrow.

Maggie, Please keep Boris for this evening as I have a few things to attend to. If that sparkler does fall out keep it hidden. See you in the Morning FAT COOK

ok Lindy no probs, Boris can sleep under my bunk. See you in the morning. Maggie

From Chief Engineer:- Sorry folks I've been having a wee bit of trouble with the Dilithium Chrystals in the main engines, all sorted now but I could do with someone to polish my toolbox??? and Im still finding knickers in the engine room, would the person responsible please stop it otherwise we'll be having a mutiny down below Chiefy

Len: Chief Engineer: Oh I am so glad you've come back, I've been looking everywhere for you! After last night's storms and gales I'm glad you have taken us into port! As I said earlier this evening, we need to asses what damage was done, if any, so that we can set sail again tomorrow for Mondelo, the the main port of the Cape Verde islands. Can you let us know what this damage is please: so that we can resume tomorrow.

does anyone need their teeth repairing, jules(jewels)dentistx