General Chat

Just a thought - I haven't read the entire thread although I do have a child with AS and did post on page 1 or 2 - you as a parent can request an assessment for a statement of special educational needs, you don;t have to wait for the school, or get their approval, to do it. I'm afraid there are some schools who like to lead parents to believe that it is up to the school to decide. For any parent of a child with an ASD - take a look at www(.)krism(.)org(.)uk - remove brackets. Loads of helpful detailed info and some very knowledgeable people. Lisa

Thanks, Maz. Joy

Ditto!!

Bernice and Carol I don't think anyone is saying that ALL lea's or ALL schools or ALL specialists are bad - we are just using this as a forum to have a moan about our specific issues. There are a lot of fabulous people out there who will OFFER help. What parents of SEN kids need is easier access to information, so that we know how the system works (when it does) and what exactly everyone (including us) should be doing. We need pro-active help, rather than having to chase and fight for what is after all our children's right. By the way, in our particular borough a Statement of Special Educational Needs DOES come with its own funding from the LEA - the money is NOT taken from the school's budget. Confirmed this today with our Head. However, not all LEA's work in the same way, so I repeat what I said about it being a postcode lottery. Maz. XX

Hi Maz, Yes the SSEN does come from funding within the LEA but I mean't (maybe I wasn't clear) that the proper support that schools should provide to kids with statements comes from their special needs budget. Thats why some schools are reluctant to name lots of hours on a statement because they would have to cough up the money to provide the suport, therfore some schools are not meeting the needs of special needs pupils as well as they could be (and I say that in a generic term) I am sure there are plenty of mainstream provisions that DO meet the needs of their pupils statemented or not!

Sorry Bernice, I am confused. I thought the statement paid for the LSA - thats what happens here. The school's SEN budget pays for anything more than that. The school's budget also pays for support for those who do not yet have a statement - children on School Action and School Action Plus. This is definitely what happens in Waltham Forest, cos the Head explained it all to me again this morning. If you have any tips to help us understand/use the system more easily, then we would all be very grateful. Maz. XX

In Exeter they gave the school enough money for 3 days help for John

Can I join in feeling really stressed at the moment, need to let of some steam. Nicola xx

go for it Nicola :-))

I am so stressed I could scream. I am worn to a frazel and I can't go on like this any more. I can't cope with it, my husband has lost his job on xmas eve and that has stuck one more knife in the wound. Now it is only me that is working and he can't get a job because the time of the year. Then I have my son in my face and won't do as he is told, he at the moment is sat on the stairs, I know he's there because he is shouting and screaming at me. He won't listen to what anyone has to say and he just wants to do what he wants to do. He always starts off ok and then just flips over the slightest little thing. It is doing my head in, I can't sleep from the worry, I am pretty clued up on what to do but nothing works. Now he is stomping on the stairs as loud as he can, I just want to run away and not come back. I have to go to work in an hour's time and I have got myself in a right state. Sorry for babbling, cause I'm sure that's what I am doing. Nicola xx

Nicola are you ok, your not babbling, i can only imagine that writing your feelings down will help a little. Hope you dont mind me asking where is your hubby could he help out. Even though my two boys dont have any problems like your child but my one son does get himself at times in situation flipping for no reason more often physically but i,m usually the one that deals with it not hubby. Please take care of yourself. Cherry

Hi Cherry Yes my hubby does help, infact he is a gem......at the time this happened he wasn't here he a gone out for a while. I am fortunate to have his help at the moment but when he goes back to work things will be different and I will be dealing with it all on my own again. Things are so hard at the moment I wonder how I cope, if I cope at all. I have to go to work soon so will say goodbye and thanks for listening. Nicola xx

Thats ok take care Cherry

There is a book that I have recommended to various people that was written by a lady I know. She works with SEN parents and has 2 SEN children herself. Please ask your local library to get this book in for you - it will give you coping strategies and contacts, whatever your child's SEN. Also, if you are interested in setting up a support group or similar, it gives advice on that too. The book is called Moving On (Supporting Parents of Children with SEN) by Alison Orphan. Published by David Fulton Publishers. ISBN 1-84312-113-1 £20.00. Alison ran a parenting class at our school and subsequently a SEN parents group. Some of our experiences and quotes were used in the book. I can thoroughly recommend this to everyone. Maz. XX

Maz, thanks for starting this thread, we have one autistic boy and one ADHD boy in our children's generation. Not mine but I still have trouble keeping up with my own they move so fast! Thanks for the list of website. My brother and sister in law will find them really useful Abigail

another nudge for Sylvia!!

Hi, my son is 12 and has Aspergers/SEN and a few other problems that go hand in hand with Autism. I am happy to share any of my experiences and advice,I ve been there and got the T shirt. Can I also add I am a big believer in letter writing, no good making phonecalls when you have a problem with your child, always write a letter and keep a copy for yourself(easy to do on the computer) not only will your letter go on file but it should get a reply. Anyway happy to help, you can contact me either on here or by emailing me. Penny in Dorset

http://www.cafamily.org.uk/index.html This is a great site for parents carers of Autistic,ADHD,special needs children, offers advice,links,info etc from anything from education,benefits,DLA,rare illnesses etc,really worth keeping in your favourites.

thanks for that addy Ken I have added it to my fav list Julia

I m Penny but using my partner s access to the site because its him thats the member of GR. CAF is a very good Org, I ve used them myself, they even advice you how to write letters etc, they will even send you sample ones to keep to give you an idea on how to write them.