General Chat

Having got up very early to go to the market on one of the other Islands, Maggie is busy artisticly arranging the 72 dozen plastic roses she got for 1p each. Its hard work weaving them in and out of that huge gap, hard thirsty work. She puts down the last 3 dozen and goes into the bar for a swift one.

Well that was an incredible night... Preston and Heston were AMAZING! Apparently Elaine is looking for me, she probably wants some tips on my fantastic ability to pull fit men... Becx (Casino Manager)

* Fat Lady gets out of bed, yawns and stretches and nearly trips over Boris.* Come along Boris we had better bet cracking, why didn't you wake me up!? *She has a quick shower, dresses and shuffles out the door with Boris in tow* 'I wonder what is Maggie is doing with all those plastic roses she mumbles to Boris'. No! don't be silly Boris you can't eat plastic...Hurry up we have to get the Barbeque going!.....

Need another drink now, my word Sassy ordered enough fruit and veg to feed a country never mind a hotel. Where on earth am I going to put it all. Staggers into kitchen and leaves boxes all over the place. She will just have to sort it all out herself, Im off for a liquid lunch.

Best get up now... 'Preston Sweetie... have you finished running the bath?' [Preston sweeps Bec up in his arms and lovingly places her in the bath... rose petals floating... candles burning...] 'Oh Preston... Yes of course I'll marry you!!! A pink diamond and platinum ring - WOW!!!' Becx (Casino Manager)

****STANDARD BARBEQUE BUFFET LUNCH**** MEAT Pork Kebabs Peppered Sirloin Steaks Beef Shaslicks - skewers of tender beef and vegetables basted with a tangy soy sauce. Tandoori Chicken - skewered and served with a minted yoghurt. Gourmet Sausages - selection includes bratwurst, chorizo and portland beef. Lamb Chops - brushed with garlic infused olive oil, oregano and lemon juice. Hamburgers - lean beef mince burgers mixed with finely diced fresh vegetables. VEGETARIAN Vegetable Shaslicks - bite size pieces of skewered asian vegetables with bean curd marinated in a light soy. Vegie Burger - made with fresh organic produce. SEAFOOD Tiger Prawns - whole market fresh prawns smothered with a garlic butter and served with lemon wedges. Calamari - tender strips, marinated in chilli, lemon juice and ginger. Grilled Baby Trout Fillets - topped with lemon and orange zest. Salmon & Lemon Grass Parcels served hot in foil Garlic Bread VEGETABLES Corn Wheels - brushed with butter and chives. Field Mushrooms - brushed with butter and chopped parsley. Mixed Bell Peppers, Eggplant, Zucchini - slow cooked in a chilli herb marinade. Onion Rings - caramelised with fresh garlic. Desiree Potatoes - lightly seasoned and cooked crispy on the char. Jacket Potatoes and Garlic Bread SALADS Caesar Salad - crisp cos lettuce, bacon, croutons tossed in a creamy anchovy dressing. Mixed Garden Salad - cherry tomatoes, cucumber, baby carrots and corn tossed together with a lemon vinaigrette. Traditional Potato Salad - freshly diced desire potatoes mixed with shallots and a homemade mayonnaise garnished with fresh parsley. Penne Pasta Salad - masarated mushrooms, broccoli, baby spinach and pinenuts mixed through al dente penne pasta. Coleslaw - mixed red & green cabbage with carrot, spring onion and home-made mayonnaise. DESSERTS Strawberries & Cream Selection of Gateau Cheesecake Profiteroles with Toffee Sauce Exotic Fruit Salad German Chocolate Cake smothered in Coconut White Chocolate Cheesecake and Apricot Compote ****All Drinks to be ordered from the Bar**** *********THE CHIP MENU******** Chip Butty Oven Baked Chips Deep Fried Chips Shallow Fried Chips Raw Chips Burnt Chip Long Chips Short Chips Yesterdays Chips Half Eaten Chips Digested Chips Spicy Chips Wood chips Cold Chips French Chips (Fries) Camel Chips *You want chips you got chips* HEAD CHEF Fat Lady

What lovely flowers! I think I'll pick some for the bar. Oh. Plastic. Hmmmmmmmmm. I must find the gardener and see what's going on. This isn't acceptable. Gwynne (Ents)

Elaine.....WOW, congrats, I would love to be matron of honour. How exciting, and yes will do the flowers, just let me know which ones you want and I will nurture them so they are perfect for you. Toasts Elaine with a very large vodka and coke.

*Fat Lady has left the Barbeque satisfied that all the guests are enjoying their poolside lunch and shuffles back to the kitchen* Eeek.....look at all of these boxes of fruit and veg piled sky high!... If I don't get kitchen help soon I shall be looking for a job on another Island...she mutters... BORISSSS... leave the onions alone..you know they give you gas...There will be lots of leftovers for you to share with that plant later...that reminds me I don't want you hanging around with that Venus Fly Trap...go and find a camel to play with...

(i see i wasnt missed while i had prob's getting on line anyway only here for a while) i wonder if the big boss has made up her mind about bar snacks? cool lemonade with ice & lemon ummmmmmmm that's better now then i think the stock need's checking

*mutters under breath* As if I hadn't got enough to deal with what with work and Mumsie going missing.................. Now 2 of the staff want to get married here. I hope they realise how much they'll have to pay. Gwynne (Ents)

'Oh Elaine' <kiss kiss> 'Fantastic news sweetie!!! And I LOVE the idea of a joint wedding... Preston and Heston could wear matching suits?? We'll just have to make sure we marry the right men! lol' Becx (Casino Manager who's is 22 and does NOT need botox!)

'Now now Elaine... Of course you'll be the centre of attention... everyone will be wondering how YOU managed to snare such an attractive YOUNG man...' Becx (Bitchy Casino Manager)

'I'm only joshing soon-to-be sister-in-law!! I'm so excited about this wedding... Vera (Wang) is flying in later to measure me for my dress and Jimmy (Choo) has already rung to congratulate us and beg me to let him do my shoes...' Becx (Casino Manager and Bride-to-be)

She is sitting quietly with the camels...slight hangover....when two Handsome men walk by chatting and laughing. Twins....She looks at them through hooded lids.....they remind her......of a time long ago when she lived in Siberia.....Sylvia the Scintillating Sandancer.... (difficult I know to understand)....She had a mad passionate affair with a Cossack..the result being.....Yes..Twins!!!!!!! Sadly she had to have them adopted as she had her career to think of....But she often thought of them. They had a peculiar birthmark exactly on the same spot as their father....in a very personal place......I wonder????????

FAT LADY COOK - Are your French Chips the same as French Fries??? 'cos if they aint then could I have some French Fries please?? Thank you

'Fantastic Elaine! Will try and make it to the cocktail do but Preston wants ANOTHER early night...by the way, does Heston have a funny birthmark... on his right buttock I think...?' Becx (Casino Manager and Bride-to-be)

Yes...she mused....it looked exactly like Stalin or was it Lenin???? ....and if my memory serves me right... it was on the right and left buttocks....quite startling it was..... She sits there, fondling Umpy's ears absent mindedly....and thinking....thinking....IF the twins were her long lost sons...they would all have a touching reunion...and she would be a VIP at the Double Wedding..... and THEN she would have those two ghastly gold diggers as daughters in laws!!!!!!! Dont think so!!!! Nah best to say nothing...I am happy as I am.....

(Bec is in a very pensive mood... wonder if my lawyer is right... I do love Preston but I so have to protect myself... I wonder if he'll sign the pre-nup'?...) Becx (Casino Manager, Bride-to-be and Multi-Gizzilionairess)

Spent a busy afternoon nurtering flowers for wedding, dreaming of brides and grooms and bouquets, and cake, and oh my god what will she want me wear, peach, blue, lilac, green. Groans I only like black, can a matron of honour wear black???? Feeling thirsty again, gardening is very hard work. Runs off to the bar for a quick one. Worring about the outfit, please dont want some insipid mamby pamby pastle shade. Shudders at the thought. Maggie