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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Suzanne

Suzanne Report 3 Jul 2012 22:47

leaflets advising the best way to cook small furry animals and road kill,after all that exercise ,the poor soul needed a good meal, he wondered towards----

Allan

Allan Report 3 Jul 2012 22:55

Allan's bbq to see if he could get any advice on skinning and cooking the little furry things, particularly as he still had the squirrel in his sporran.

A veritable feast fit for kings when cooked with those special mushrooms that

Suzanne

Suzanne Report 3 Jul 2012 23:01

to a far away place,were big bertha with the big red billowing knickers was the thing that dreams are made of,he woke up from his terrible nightmare, "or was it a nightmare or was it real,oh god he thought did i really do that!-----did i really eat the mushrooms and show her my onions===

Allan

Allan Report 3 Jul 2012 23:06

or were those big red bloomers merely a pigment of my imagination?

Barbra

Barbra Report 3 Jul 2012 23:32

They have just flown away in a gussset of wind .over the hills & far away .blooming eck thats not funny i have got a cold

Allan

Allan Report 3 Jul 2012 23:42

heart, as Eldrick was unmoved by the fact that Big Bertha was still wearing them when they blew away.

it did however give him an idea for a hot air balloon. That would save much walking: now how to

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 4 Jul 2012 00:00

get his hands on some large bloomers

Allan

Allan Report 4 Jul 2012 00:04

without being arrested for either sexual assault or theft, depending on how he acquired them.

Still nothing ventured, nothing gained so

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 4 Jul 2012 00:11

he looked around for a large female - there were plenty around with short skirts but on closer inspection they seemed to be wearing thongs - no wonder they had pained looks on their faces - he needed someone older, in their fifties say, and then he saw her - a massive bird - what you might call a boiling piece - she would surely be wearing some but how to find out - he decided to fall to the ground as if in a faint in the hope she'd come across - so to speak - and it worked - as she was bending over him he couldn't help but notice that

Allan

Allan Report 4 Jul 2012 00:20

the sun was suddenly blocked out. he wouldn't say she was huge but his plans involved a hot air balloon, not a barrage balloon.

Still he could always cut them down to size and sell the surplus to a developing country for use as bedding for its entire population, so he

lilybids

lilybids Report 4 Jul 2012 10:20

asked the rather obese lady if she had a spare pair of bloomers without elastic for his plan and she

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 4 Jul 2012 10:48

surprised him - was very forthcoming and said he should accompany her to her house where he could take his pick!!! so off they went and

Barbra

Barbra Report 4 Jul 2012 11:41

she offered him some pick & mix .he looked a bit

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 4 Jul 2012 11:44

flummoxed at first but in the end chose a large pair of bright blue ones and thanking her profusely he left to see if he could

Barbra

Barbra Report 4 Jul 2012 12:45

Hitch a lift as far away as possible.,,because the young lady he had just left had intentions on the poor man he

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 4 Jul 2012 13:15

couldn't really take any more of big powerful women - he rather liked the shy gentle types - were there any left on the planet he wonder, as he strode on, knickers in hand, hoping he would find

Merlin

Merlin Report 4 Jul 2012 13:39

Of which there were aplenty in Banbury, and he felt a little cross because there were no hot buns there only rings and bells so he dicided to become a bellringer as he was becoming a dead ringer for Quasimodo (who was crossed with a camel) but to do that he had to get hold of those ring to flog in the market,so he set up a stall and

lilybids

lilybids Report 4 Jul 2012 13:42

a basket to go under his balloon after he he had made it,so with a purposeful stride he went forth and

lilybids

lilybids Report 4 Jul 2012 13:48

clashed with Merlin :-D :-D

Merlin

Merlin Report 4 Jul 2012 13:52

Like Big Bertha with her Bra and Knickers (Clash of the Titans :-D) very tight.pmsl :-D