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CHRONICLES OF NUTLODGE

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 22 Mar 2010 18:57

I have pretty index cards too LOL. Mine are eventually getting my tree records on. One branch of the family almost sorted loads to go LOL.

RMS My man is an absolute darling WELL!!! 50% of the time anyway LOL

YG I am so glad Duffy sems to be well on the mend.

RockyMountainShy

RockyMountainShy Report 22 Mar 2010 19:03

I would say get well soon Duffy too, but I won't, 'cause I don't like cats. They dig in our garden, go to the bathroom in our garden, and they chase the birds in our garden.

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 22 Mar 2010 19:04

LOL RMS. MIne don't chase birds cos they get what for if they do. They don't GO in my garden LOL

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 22 Mar 2010 20:10

That's cos they've managed to get themselves over to RMS' garden!!!!

Glad your furry companion seems better YG

AuntySherlock

AuntySherlock Report 22 Mar 2010 20:19

Hi There. I'm awake. Just.

Index cards. I have 500 of them. One with writing on it. Decided it was such a shame to spoil their surface with writing. So they are resting and staying clean.

Men are OK once they have been through basic training. Unfortunately basic training usually takes about thirty years. After that they are trained in the most basic of life's necessities, cooking, cleaning, gardening, vacuuming. If you need ironing and cake decorating they need to have been taught that from the cradle and are probably not interested in girls.

And if you have ever wondered about those important questions here you are!!!
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-----------------------------------------------------------

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me....'
-----------------------------------------------------------
How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
----------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
-- --------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
----------------------- -----------------------------
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street with a bald head
and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
------------------------------------------------------


I will now leave.

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 22 Mar 2010 20:25

Lol I should hope so too!!

On a serious note, do you think that there are now far more jokes around putting men down, than women? Or is it just me being too sensitive?

RockyMountainShy

RockyMountainShy Report 22 Mar 2010 20:29

OK I'll rephrase the question ---- What does the writing on your index card(s) say????

LaG - Come get your cat !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They don't GO in your garden? They must hold it until they get into your neighbours then.

AuntySherlock

AuntySherlock Report 22 Mar 2010 20:40

Do you mean like, "Women Strike back!! After years of being the butt of the jokes women are now finding they can give as good as they have been receiving. Hmmm I think it has been happening for a while if the contents of my email in box is anything to go by.

Writing on index cards. Whoops I have done three. Wonder when I did the other two. My writing has the name of person on the top GREEN Hannah Maria (Anna). Birth: 1838 Stepney London UK. Christened: 9 Oct 1838 St Dunstan Stepney Married: James Carter, then Death: Siblings: Mother: Father: all of which still need to be filled in. On the back of one of them I have writting Checking: Birth: Stepney 1c 518 Sep 1857 Certificate ordered 13/12/09 and that's it!!!

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 22 Mar 2010 20:50

My cards have on front. name birth date place,mother fathers names. baptism,marriage date,place and spouse. date and place of death. Back has place of residence(s) profession and certificates etc.


You got it in one RMS. Next door has a 'Wildlife garden' polite way of describing it !!!! that's why they like it

AuntySherlock

AuntySherlock Report 22 Mar 2010 22:39

Received this, this morning. Whooo hooo. Now I know how we can use the CPs. Hire them out for this little job and charge $200 per cat. I can see the money rolling in as I type.

http://www.hyd-masti.com/2008/10/paint-your-catunbelievable.html

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 23 Mar 2010 00:15

I will take a look at that tomorrow Aunty. Off to bed now before I slumpo over the laptop LOL. Nite

Mazfromnorf

Mazfromnorf Report 23 Mar 2010 06:48

morning all CPs ned a job lol
YG glad duffy is OK they are a worry

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 23 Mar 2010 09:36

Morning all, just off out but stopped by to tidy up the throne room, put out drinks and bikkies. Catch you all later enjoy your day

Pauline $(*-*)$

Pauline $(*-*)$ Report 23 Mar 2010 09:52


Right, I've enjoyed the drink and bikkies - thanks for that LG, I'm off out now as well.

Women live longer than men because they haven't got time to die while their men are alive, too busy cleaning up after them.

I've only had my hubby 26 years - so he's still in basic training. I think I'm lagging behind with his training though - so far I've only managed to get him to do the gardening.

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 23 Mar 2010 11:40

You didn't leave many biccies Pauline! Lets hope Maz brings some home from work. You mean you've actually managed to *train* your OH to do the gardening? You'll have to pass on the tips. Mine faffs around with the grass at this time of year, and then....................and then...........thats it!

Those cat photos are really very artistic, but I wonder how they cope when they come up against other cats or the local wildlife?

AuntySherlock

AuntySherlock Report 23 Mar 2010 12:21

Pauline I will let you in on a secret. Well it isn't really a secret because I have heard my OH say it many times. Usually in answer to the question, why do you cook?



Well I had to learn to cook or I would have starved!!

Mazfromnorf

Mazfromnorf Report 23 Mar 2010 14:21

well i have loads of flapjack again here makes a mess but the pets have pinched the throne room so leaving it in the cupbpoard

Pauline $(*-*)$

Pauline $(*-*)$ Report 23 Mar 2010 17:10


Aunty, if I didn't cook, he'd just get take-away food every night, he wouldn't cook.

He vacuumed the carpets once - May 4th 1984 it was. I haven't done a very good job of training him have I?

DET, I was hungry this morning, I ate all the chocolate ones, but I left you a couple of plain ones.

I love flapjacks but I won't eat them all this time - it might put me off my dinner.

YG

YG Report 23 Mar 2010 17:15

Don't make a mess in the throne room with those flapjack crumbs!! LG will have your guts for garters (another addition to her extensive wardrobe lol!)

Aunty, you know perfectly well how LG's cat's are going to finish up now, once she has looked at the link!!! Don't have to be a member of Mensa to sort that one out!!

Oooh, I'm so excited!! Yesterday and today, coming home from work, passed a fire engine each day!! Only trouble was it was going in the opposite direction, but there was some eye candy on board!!! My knees are still trembling!!

Mazfromnorf

Mazfromnorf Report 23 Mar 2010 20:09

Bang bang I have a crow bar still cant get in we need the dynamite for this one lol its pouring here with rain