General Chat

Just popped home as working local.
As you all know my dad had a stroke five years ago,
and mum takes care of him at home. She refuses to have help in, but lets you kow how good she is. What strain it is ...........
But doesn't make him go into a nursing home once or twice a week, to give herself a rest. Every Sunday we look forward to listening to her complain. (Not).
Really she is fantastic, I could not and would not do it. Have to get back to work see you all tonight xx

Joyce my friend, how lovely to see a long message from you. So sorry the op did not materialise. did they say why not? i.e. would it be possible to get a second opinion? Don't you wonder sometimes if our bodies belong to us or the medical profession?

glad to see that Toby is still keeping you active and terrorising the postmen. I miss his stories.
Sad that your daughter has had to let the horses go to Coventry but I am sure your granddaughter enjoys having them.

Please do keep in touch with us Joyce and i hope you feel better about your situation soon as i am sure it must be very depressing for you.

Love
Ann
Glos

Thank you all for your words of wisdom, you are all indeed 'family'. Gail you made me feel so much better, we've all been thrown by this, but haven't wanted to say so when our issues may pale beside Deanna's.
Dear Caz what a disappointment that the new patches aren't as effective. perhaps some oral (liquid or tabs) for breakthrough would be helpful. There are several variations of the one drug - instant, short-acting, long-acting etc. Perhaps they could be used as an adjunct to the patches. or as has been suggested, a pain pump. How I wish we could help bring you some relief.
Gill you can PM me also if you need someone to shout at. Same goes for anyone, we may be far apart physically but there's a closeness here which is quite remarkable. People with their own cares, caring for each other.
group hug,
maryXXX

Hello all ,Mary thank you for the lovely card and what was in it,have added it on my thread
JoyceP,for once im lost for words the only thing i can say is were all here for one another,and if i can help in any way just say
Tinkerbell,hope your well
Caz,you no im here for you night or day you must get fed up sometimes me rining you ,but if i can make you smile and forget your pain even for few minutes,its worth it my friend
Gail,hope your having better time than late
Deanna,hope to see you back soon funny how one misses us having laugh together
for anyone ive missed have agood day and take care
Dutchxxx

JoyceP I am so glad to see you back - and for Toby to be a presence among us again!!
Sharron, please don't apologise for your message -it helps others, to know what questions to ask of the professionals. You are so right, psychological support is absolutely essential, and so often lacking. The carer needs encouragement as well as the stroke victim, as days are long and frustrations tend to pile on each other.
I hope Tony and Allen will know they have our support. Sharron you also deserve our respect for coping so well.
Gail you are one remarkable lady, to have come back so well from your accident. Sheer b*****y determination.
back to necessary h*******k, it's a bad word.
I've promised the kids a picnic at the park for lunch, while the turkey is cooking for our Thanksgiving supper. Speaking of which,Tom needs to go in the oven. For once, the stuffing will be cooked separately, the gluten free bread isn't thawed out in time.
With any luck it may rain before lunchtime . . . . why did I promise a picnic. . . .
The trees are about 70% changed in colour, autumn is upon us, the colours are beautiful. probably be a good, calming, outing.
Know you're cared for, dear friends,
Mary XXX

Hi Gail, Ann and all,
Just to say that my age and health concerns are against me regarding the once proposed operation.
Had meeting with anaesthetist who said my chances of surviving the op. were around 20% and he was no prepared to put me to sleep, then lose me, ti's major surgery after all....had already talked to my family on this risk factor and they stood behind me on whichever decision I took....the decision was taken for me...nuf said...
If and when it ruptures it will be quick so that's a consolation.....in a way it has opened up the chance for me and the children to discuss all the pro's and cons which will follow, given us time to enjoy each other and not leave too many heartaches or words unsaid...it is a bit like closure before the closure if you know what I mean?.

Heavens above folks, I have not kicked the bucket yet, who knows I could be around for another year to torment you all xx bye the way I will be celebrating my 77th birthday on 21st of this month so reckon a party is on the cards..

Bye for now and take care

JoyceP xxxxxxxxx

Hello everyone,
Like all of you on here, I am knocked sideways by Deanna's stroke.She has given me such great support since joining this thread. She was the second person to welcome me here.She has to take a lot of steroids, as you all know, so it was such a great help to be able to talk to here aout my handicapped daughter, who takes an awful lot of these meds. too.
It hits harder when it is someone we all know and love, doesn't it?
Whilst making some leak & potato soup earlier, I a listening to The Archers.Of couse it had to be about Peggy,who was having a stroke.Wish I had turned it off....Have to admit to shedding a few tears...

Gail, thank you for your offer to sit on the wall, coffee and some of Lou's chocolate sounds just the right medicine at the moment.You are such a lucky woman to be able to be happy to have such a wonderful treasure trove. Your brother obviously doesn't seem to share your views.He is missing out on REAL richnesses.I would give a lot to have the photos etc, of my Irish grandparents,that my uncle's wife threw away, after uncle died.There was no monetry gain in such thing.
Mary, I am very sorry to read about your troubles with your g.son.It is very hard for you, to say the least.
Caz, please keep posting, and please don't delete.This is such a wonderful thread,as Ann f.G says, everyone here is genuine and only try to help each other. It is also a lifeline for me.I have always crawled into a hole when things get too much for me, and have had such black thoughts that it scares me.This way, I can talk a bit about what is going on in my life, but not all, it is too dark sometimes.
Reading what you say Sharron, it gives me comfort, because you are also clear-minded, but humane.
Sometimes, we need someone who can sort things and sum things up, so to speak, which you, Ann,JP and others do.Thank you for this.

Today is my grandson Zachaar's 9th birthday. I phoned him earlier when he came home from school. Just listening him chatter away helped lift this black cloud a bit.
I have discovered what my children who live in Holland plan to do for my 65th in novemeber.I have always said I would much rather that something was done for me than bought presents, even when they were very small.Mother's day meant a pleasant day with drawings and maybe breakfast in bed-a LUXURY.No pressies, I don't want them. How do you place time that others give up? This is worth more than gold to me.Youngest daughter sent me a mail asking what I needed doing in the house, when they come down in the weekend for my birthday. I mentioned this to the daughter who lives 2 doors down, she had to laugh, said the cat was out of the bag, so to speak. This is THE most wonderful present I could have wanted, all are coming to stay the weekend here and are doing some jobs I can't do myself anymore.Grandson Douglas is going to cook for everyone, his pressie to me.Don't know exactly what the others are doing. My daughter In Brittany already gave me my pressie, when she sent me to see my old schoolfriend in England recently.I have no money to speak of, but think myself as the richest person in the world.
Another wonderful pressie would be if Deanna has a speedy recovery.

Thank you all for 'listening'.

Eileen xx

Sorry for my far too long message.Don't want to bore anyone. xx

Eileen, you have not bored anyone!! What a lovely 'present' to have to look forward to. that is the greatest gift they can give you..... time.

Joyce At least you know what you are facing and of course we are not writing you off you will go on for years yet. I think i have said that my Mum died of a ruptured Aortic aneurism but she lived with it until she was 85 and her death was very peaceful and painless. Please continue to write to us on here when you can. 77 you certainly don't sound it.

Ann
Glos

Joyce so lovely to see you back on here, and I am glad you told everyone although I know how hard it was to do. We can all support you together now, we have missed you, and of course Toby's escapades.

I rang Chris this morning but she was out on a call, was told she would ring me this afternoon. She has not long since rung and said I am a bit complicated with the scan and X-rays I've had, she is scurrying round now trying to get the results and is coming up to see me tomorrow afternoon. She will go through all my tablets and sort something out hopefully. She said she will have a better idea what to do when she sees results of X-ray and bone scan, although I have my CT scan to come on Friday.

Sharron, that was the most sensible suggestion I have heard in ages. I know just what you mean about bewilderment, I was left to look after my mum after a stroke with no idea what to expect.

Must go now as I have to prepare veg for tea, sorry if this is all confused I am in a rush.

Caz xx

Hey Eileen, my 65th is in November as well, and my daughter will turn 40 the same day. Two milestones at once.
We've decided to have an Open House, to welcome people who have made a difference in our lives, for a few minutes or a few hours, we don't need pressies -the love of friends and family, and a houseful of memories is quite sufficient. . . BTW my GR friends are invited . . . . to celebrate life and the road we've travelled to get to this point. Hopefully my grandson will be as well-behaved as he can . . . LOL. I'd like to charter a plane and fly my cousins from England, Wales and NZ, plus my cyber friends, in for the day . . . .
I'm still laughing over jelly on the ceiling. It would probably hold better than my bed which collapsed again yesterday. not fun sleeping at a 45 degree angle.

off to make a picnic lunch,
MaryXXX

Thank you Ann, you are such a kind person. You have p.m'd me in the past with such kind messages.Yes, I agree, time is the most important thing anyone can give. I don't care much about moneytry things,(is this a word?), but certainly appreciate those giving up their precious time.....
Just to think those horrible electric.lead's/wires (not sure what you call them), will be hidden, and the horrible tongue-in-grove wall may be taken down, is such a lovely idea.Until a few years ago, when I had a very bad fall, without me remembering how this happened,I was able to do everything in the house myself, being a real avid DIY-er, but, since then, I have lost my self confidence.I still can't remember what happened, so am unsure of myself on a ladder. In '97, I fell from amost 3 meters, broke my left heel, which was more of a nuisance than anything else, but, the fall in 2006, and not knowing how or what, has really broken more than bones. Self-confidence is harder to heal than bones.
Joyce (Dutch) has also cheered me up greatly, so funny. She has just phoned me, whilst I was warming up some soup. It is sooo strange that she phoned at the exact same moment I was mailing her name here. She has phones on other occasions when I was thinking of her etc. Telepathy or what?

Love to all from Eileen x

Hi Mary, when is it your 65th birthday?My daugher who lives two doors down has her 40th birthday 16th november,,mine is on the 9th. You sound so much like me, in your wishes for your birthday, no bought pressies etc. Wish my relations in Wales & France could come over too....
Sharron's remark about jelly, is sooo funny.We can all probably relate to this.

Joyce (Dutch) has just phoned again. Thank God for her great sense of humour!!!!She can pull you out of your dark hole....

Love from Eileen x

Eileen, it will be our daughter's 47th birthday on 16th November. Doesn't seem possible that I have a daughter who is nearly 50. I can remember when my mum was 50!!!!
you know you can PM me any time, anyone can, i will always listen.

Ann
Glos

Just read that Peggy has had a stroke. Oh,I do hope the self righteous old bat has lost the power of speech. I want her to DRIBBLE!!!!!

Ann, your daugher & mine share the same birthdate, not year. How odd is that.I can understand what you mean.my eldest, i.e the Andrea, who is handicapped, turned 45 in may.I can still remember the day she was born... My mother always seemed older somehow, bless her.
Thank you for your offer, I may take you up on this.

Sharron, who is Peggy? Do you mean the actress who plays in EE? I don't know of a Peggy on this thread.Must be me though, names are my weak point.

Eileen x

Peggy Woolley in the Archers.

Hi Eileen, mine and my daughter are both the 20th. My dear uncle will be 106 on Nov 16th bless him.
I only want to live that long if my mind is as sharp as his has been (of course he had a head start LOL.)
Just took Tom the turkey (our Thanksgiving today)out of the oven, 2 granddaughters already into the stuffing, so we're going to eat early for once, before the bird is emptied.
have a good night,all, special hugs to those who need them today.
MaryXXX

Mary, wow 106, that is some age!

Hope you all enjoyed your Turkey. I didn't know thanksgiving was today (I assume that is in Canada?)

Betty,
so sorry to hear of your problems with your son and the computer. It must be so difficult for you.

Eileen, 16th November seems popular for birthdays on here then. yes, you PM me any time, I mean that. You may not get an immediate reply but it would not be long.

Ann
Glos

Just a quick hi as I need to get to bed, up early to go to my cousin's funeral 100 miles away!

Had a phone call from our lovely Betty, what a gorgeous accent, I am so sorry you have such a lot to cope with and all my other friends, hope today brings a little joy along with all the things you have to deal with.
love and hugs to all, spare monitor from o.h.'s dad, so can be in touch with you all again, but such a tiny screen my eyes are sore
love and hugs to you all
Lizxxx