General Chat

catchthecatch
Why not write both? Well I am not sure really, I enjoy reading poetry and like writing, generally I write something based on fact.
I always thought that most people could write prose, whilst some may excel others would be fun and intersting but poetry...now that is really for the blessed, for those with a talent and empathy.
But you people on here have been so kind and generous with your encouragement......I will give both a try.
Thank you

Bridget

Tolstoy wrote " The activity of art is based on the fact that a man, receiving through his sense of hearing or sight another man's expression of feeling, is capable of experiencing the emotion which moved the man who expressed it. To take the simplest example; one man laughs, and another who hears becomes merry; or a man weeps, and another who hears feels sorrow. A man is excited or irritated, and another man seeing him comes to a similar state of mind. By his movements or by the sounds of his voice, a man expresses courage and determination or sadness and calmness, and this state of mind passes on to others. A man suffers, expressing his sufferings by groans and spasms, and this suffering transmits itself to other people; a man expresses his feeling of admiration, devotion, fear, respect, or love to certain objects, persons, or phenomena, and others are infected by the same feelings of admiration, devotion, fear, respect, or love to the same objects, persons, and phenomena.

I found this when studying some time ago and still think it is a wonderful expression of what art is.

We talk so often about amazing art and generally we are thinking of pictures hanging in galleries, music being played in places such as the Albert Hall but my belief is that the food we eat prepared with detail and passion, the abilty to find the right words at happy and difficult times is also art

So everyone what are your views?

Bridget

Art like beauty is in the eye (or heart, mind, ear, etc) of the beholder.

It's a funny old day .. I have got my two grandsons A & E aged 5 and 6, with me for the day. We have sent their Dad (my son) to Coventry, on a course.

So far the six year old has eaten two pieces of toast a muffin (cake) a ham roll and a hot dog.
It has been raining here - and I have to stay in - not because of the rain, but because my brothers are taking part in a sponsered walk. (in aid of Altzhiemers spl?)
They are walking along the canals from Birmingham to Penkridge, while someone else is walking from Stoke-on-Trent to Penkridge. They should be meeting there in a canal-side pub this evening.
My job, is to post up-dates to a couple of sites, including facebook. So I have to stay near phone and computer.

Tess

A funny week, and I hope that another like this one does not happen for some long time.
My youngest stepson, not a description I use veryboften as I have cared for him almost since birth has had a court summons ! To say we are shocked is to put it mildly. He was foolish when aged about 18 and he became father. Like many youngsters he did not listen to us and they went on to have two more children and his grandparents bought them a home, so no mortgage. Almost inevitably the marriage broke up and he left the home.
I will not bore everyone any longer but his wife hs refused access on many occasions, she has received financial support from him, but recently has started to say the most appalling statements about him. We know that he is not perfect and does become angry when she will not let him see the children. His father went with him recently and found her asleep, incapable to look after the children, they had not had anything to eat and as forbtheir cleanliness there is little to be said!
Oh has just paid one thousand pounds for him and his son to take the children on holiday in the UK not to far from where they so she could be safely nearby.

Yesterday son received a summons fo attacking her both verbally and physically.......he denies this vehemently and is very distressed, oh will go to the court with him.
I have offered to take the chidren but oh feels that this would not be the right thing to do........

The hearing is on Wednesday and my son marries as you all know on Friday, what a week.


Positive thinking comes to mind but somehow I have the feeling that this is going to be a very difficult week.

Bridget

Sorry about my rather rambling message this morning but had to share my news with some. My oh has said that he will be at court with his son but he does not see that we could look after three young children! The big problem is that my stepson has bi polar disease and so does his wife so not easy to give help as sometimes they are both very difficul at times.
I have even thought that the children may be better with foster parents and then I feel very guilty!

I am nudging this just to see if anyone else has any experience in such matters

Bridget

Hi Bridget, sorry to hear about your stressful time. My grandsons have just left and I need to resst. Will be back either tonight or tomorrow about access to the children.
Just too tired at the moment to make any sense.
Will be thinking of you all

Tess

I shall be away from Wednesday until Sunday evening and will not be able to post so please keep it going for me. Thanks.

On Thursday evening we are having dinner with army son and his senior officers, must say I feel a little nervous....then of course it is the wedding on Friday followed by a small family gathering,that is about 30 people.bought the hat and and shoes today so ready at last. Even remembered to buy new film for camera.......

Take care everyonehopeto hear from you all

Byebye


Bridget

Bridget, sorry I didn't get back to you. When my energy levels are low (which is the case at the moment), my brain seems to slip out og gear too.

I hope that your step-son has got some sort of represtation for Wednesday. Does he have support from his Mental Health Team?

It is difficult enough going through a marriage breakdown (as you and I both know) without out the added on problems caused by MenTal Health Issues.

Are the childrens other grandparents involved at all? If so it might br helpful to arrange meetings via both sets of grandparents.

It would seem that both your (step)son and his ex need a lot of help.

I will pm you with some thoughts in the next few days.
Will be thinking of you all. Hope that Wednesday isn't as bad as you fear and that some of the issues can be resolved.

Enjoy the "Special Day" on Friday. At least you have got something good to look forward to.

Tess

Greetings all,

We have an internet connection at last, not sure for how long though, and so slow.

Bridget I am so sorry to hear that you are going through a stressful time. Do hope things will go smoothly for your stepson on Wednesday and that matters will be sorted out, I will be thinking of you all.

Enjoy the dinner on Thursday evening and have a wonderful time at the wedding on Friday.


Val. in SA.

Val and others who have replied recently, Thank you for your messages.
Well the meeting went well and stepson spoke to the judge and an agreement in place. I think he has resigned to himself
the knowledge that his wife can remain in his house until the youngest child aged 3 is 26years old or 18 if they stay in education. In addition he must pay a substantial amount of money each month for the upkeep of the children.

I do believe that this is erring towards punishing fathers as if the home could be sold it would allow him to have a deposit on a home for himself and his family could still buy a smaller but accommodating bungalow for the 3 children and his wife to live .....but what can one say..the judge has made the decision
So thank you everyone for supporting me and the family we are now looking forward rather than backwards.

Bridget

I thought that I had added to this thread a little while ago (quite a long entry too). Have no idea what happened. But will be back tomorrow!

Good morning everyone
A beautiful suny morning here in Hastings and I have been gazing out of the window for about 30 minutes. There hasn't been much happening, the seagulls flying around as usuall, the trees and bushes standing silently by, the occassional sound of a car leaving the nearby houses and peace reigning.
I find it strange for 07.15 hrs not to see some sort of activity but maybe that is because I am always up so early??

Today is the last day that my youngest child is a batchelor!
Today I cannot believe where those years have gone, I recall the day he was born weighing barely enough to survive as was his twin brother but they were both so full of determination and i look at them now with such pride.

My outfit is ready, we have packed our bags and will be ready to drive away after I have had my hair "done" at the hairdressers. I had it cut recently and it feels good so now need it to look good.!!

I wish you all a happy and peaceful day.

Re son and court.
It turned out to be somewhat different to what was expected, and he has been told by the judge that his wife and children stay in the bungalow until the youngest child is at least 16 years old.
The maintenance will in future be put into a seperate bank account which means that there is evidnece that his wife has received it...he has been giving her cash.
Another meeting is to be arranged re contact with his children but at the moment his contact has been suspended for about 6 weeks. he cannot even telephone them but his mother can make one call a week to speak to them and this will be reviewed.
Well time to go and make the coffee, have some breakfast etc so please remember I will not be ale to access a computer until sunday evening so take care and please keep this thread going

Bridget
PS Bridget the fidget you did post a couple of days ago and I think it s at the top of his page

Goodmorning Bridget and and anyone else who looks in here to-day.

So nice that your son's business has been sorted, I'm sure it will be difficult not seeing his children for a while, but as you say the judge makes the ruling. He can now look forward and carry on with his life.

I had my hair cut a week or so ago and listened to my hairdresser who suggested shorter at the back and sides, I now feel as if I have fallen under the lawn mower!! I have very fine hair which is difficulkt to manage at the best of times, now it is even more difficult, so will have to exercise some patience now.

I am getting up later these days as the mornings are so dark. Looking out aross the sea this morning the sky was a beautiful pink as the sun was rising.

You must enjoy the wedding to-morrow .




Val in SA.

Hi Bridget, at least things are getting sorted for your son, re his children. He will be able to prove that he has made payments. He will have news about his children (perhaps his mother will be able ro record the calls).
Eventually he will be able to get access, whatever mood their mother is in. So he will have the opportunity to build up a good strong relationship with them.

Regarding the disappearing post... I had done one yesterday, all about my busy day, so not the one at the top of the page.

Have a good evening tonight and enjoy being mother of the groom tomorrow. I read your posting on Izzy's thread, about the prayer that will be said at the end of the service, very moving.

Val, I hope that you soon get used to your new haircut.

I am expecting a gardner to come soon, to get rid of all the weeds in my back garden, so I am typing this with my fingers crossed!

Tess

Well, the gardner arrived, did some work and then had a phone call. It was from a regular customer - they needed his help pdq an emergency of some sort.
So off he went to help them, he will be back on Monday.

Today is THE big day. I hope that everything goes well for the wedding Bridget and that you all have a good time. Regards to Bride, Groom and everyone else.

Tess

My word the wind is really unpleasant to-day and as we do not have a gardener any more I have just spent the last couple of hours weeding the garden, I am definitely not cut out for that!! I am going to ask the chap who cuts our lawn whether his labourers can perhaps do some weeding for us even if it is only once a month. It is actually quite difficult to find a reliable worker.

Bridget I hope the wedding goes well to-day and everyone enjoys themselves.

Jimmy is tidying the garage to-day a job which is long overdue I might add, so I am expecting rain!




Take care.


Val in SA.

Val, Tess and anyone else on here.

We arrived back home about 2 hours ago, the washing is on, OH is asleep and I decidied to send a message to you all re the wedding.

Unfortunately I cannot tell you exactly where it was held but can descibe some of the setting and the joy of the day.

Army son the one getting married had a complete itinary tell us all exactly where we had to be and at what time!!

The bride has beautiful long wavy red hair and she wore a cream dress with a long train which was covered in fine lace with golden flowers embroidered on it. Her hair was up but with whisby bits as well just to soften the look, my son was in his Blues and carried a sword as part of his dress code along )with his campaign medals.
The bride shed tears of happiness and had to spend a few moments outside the room in the register office until she could compose herself.

The service was very personalised and both mothers had a role to play in that they were each given a light hearted poem to read!
We then had a minute or two of silence simply to reflect what had happenend and then another piece was read by my son, for comrades no longer here or badly injured.

Then it was a walk through the town which was full of shoppers, and we headed for the park for the main photo shoots.
The people came out of the shops and called all sorts of good wishes, local people knowing where my son came from were cheering him and his fellow soldiers, the atmosphere was electric, foreigners from as far as china asked if they could take photos and bless the couple, it was so very happy , jolly and inspiring.
We finally had all the photos required and went to a fanatastic restaurant built in 1450 and what a wonderful meal we had.
After an afternoon nap we all met again in the officers mess, more music, drinks , food and congenial conversation...whhat a wonderful day and he couple would not allow the parents to pay one penny!!!

I will not bore you all any more and I will be back tomorrow.

bye for noow

bridget

Somehow I missed this thread. Oh Bridget, you have had a difficult week in some ways and a lovely one in others.

I am so glad the wedding went well, it all sounded delightful. All the very best to the happy couple.

I hope things work out for your stepson, I thought the law was that the Mother had to have a home for the children, which is fair enough, I didn't think the court wouldn't suggest downsizing for the mother so the father could get somehwere to live a swell. It does all seem very one sided.