General Chat

Janet we will always come through as long as we have this thread, don 't you think?
I feel I can come on whenever I feel like chatting or seeing who is on just now.

Actually.... where is everyone?

Shaz, don't forget to say how you got on.
And everyone else, just keep smiling, it wont make us better but it sure does help!

I'm still here procrastinating.... I'm getting like my son!! Where is my decisive nature going??
Better go catch it... I have 'positive' thngs to do.

Deanna XX

'Walkies' update.....
yes I made it and am back to annoy you all, well some of you xxx

Firstly, Toby has never walked, had his lead put on, been pulled from side to side, traversed strange side roads, sniffed up my trees (not that I sniff trees)and escorted by the delectable JoyceP before, he was as good as gold and behaved himself like a true gentleman. On the other hand I believe he wondered why he was pulled back from the thick undergrowth...I was scared in case I tripped over a twig...also why he was not allowed to fraternise with his opposite sex when all I wanted to do was return home.I was almost legless by this time.
Same routine tomorrow but Wed. is computer lesson morning, he he..and Thursday, stop smoking therapy, nah, nah.....my daughter reckons after two months of 'walkies' I will be taking up white water rafting, mountain climbing, bungie jumping and has even suggested I get myself a bicycle... whatever happened to growing old gracefully.... much prefer Caz's input of getting myself a walking stick and Deanna's offer of some of her 'iron pills'.xxxx
by the way Caz it was nice of you to think of baking a cake for me to celebrate my walk but I was only going round the block, not the moon lol...

Elaine, I hope you manage to get hold of a car and that the news for your hubby is favourable from the heart surgeon xx
Shaz, good luck at your interview, wow them with your personality xxx
Janet, as you know we are all here to help each other..and that's why this thread is fantastic.. we care xxxxx
Deanna, why are you standing still? hope you have caught whatever you were trying to catch!! lol.

Just maybe I will sleep tonight, no dozing today what with the pooch missing his mistress..it was a long day for him, was dropped off at 7am and daughter uplifted him around 5pm..
Enjoy what is left of today and hopefully you will sleep tight.
Love
JoycePxxxxxxxxx

On a therapy programme now with the charity Mind.
I have 8 sessions on a computer plus some homework and it has the same effect as CBT.

evening all glad to report brother just rang he taking us in the morning and waiting for us to bring us home from hospital so i can relax on that front gona try get early night thank you everyone for your pms and good whishes will update tomorrow on out come night all sleep well hugs xxelainexx

Hello all,

Just catching up on the news on this thread, I have stayed off for a bit as I felt denial was better than admission (you know what I mean).

I am still on low dosage Cipralex but over the past month I have been so up and down I can't quite believe it.

Don't get upset in front of hubby cos he is so good to me I hate to see him feel so helpless. However I do have a good friend that I can cry with.

Just finding it hard to cope with the constant pain and the fact that I only leave the house for medical appointments plus one walk each week.

My problems are nothing compared to others here and that's another reason why I haven't posted.

Sometimes though I have to admit defeat and admit that I am still suffering the after effects of the breakdown in 2004.

I hope those who are suffering today feel better tomorrow, I'm so pleased that everyone can get support here.

Sue xx

I came on to say good night to all on here this evening.

Joyce P.... I'm not standing still... did I say I was standing still?
You picking on me again because I wouldn't share my iron tablets??
Good night love... I love you even if you are horrible to me!!! ;-0)

Sue, NEVER think that your problems are less than anyone else's.
When you feel the pain... it is YOUR pain, and only you can feel it... that makes it important.
It is no consolation to you that you are in less pain than someone else. x
You moan all you want, I will certainly moan at you if I'm having a bad day!! ;-0)

Elaine I am so happy for you.
I was hoping that something would turn up.
good old brother comes good... give him a well deserved hug.
Let us know haw you both get on tomorrow, and I just KNOW it will be good.
It is your turn for a good luck story.

Malc good luck with this new thing ... i hope it really works for you.

Shaz, where are you? What happened today?

Caz, Betty, Janet, and everyone else.... have a good night sleep and we'll all be here again tomorrow.

God Bless,
Deanna XX

evening ladies and gents,
My sister took mum to visit dad today, and they say he was in a really bright mood. Throwing kisses
and smiling. Mum has a visit planned tomorrow so they can asses the bungalow to see if there is anything they can offer to help mum with him. I picked mum up after work and gave her tea at my house, then took her home and finally got sat down about half seven.

Read up on here and pm'ed some of you. Those I haven't love to you all.

Oh,and I visited my work mate who is off ill. I'm shocked she looks so poorly. First it's a virus then a water infection now it's not so test's to see what it is. She can't keep anything down, been being sick on and off for three weeks. She has lost so much weight I feel quite upset.

Well I'm off to bed nite nite xx

Hi everyone,
Glad to see that things seem to be brightening up for most people, great to see that your father continues to make progess Carole.
Ycaz will do my best to-morrow for you. Liz i hope that things have calmed down now and that the lady called to-day and that you got some sadisfaction from the meeting.Looking forward to your posting to-night but may not see it until to-morrow as i am going to bed early going to town to-morrow Malc it is great to get a challenge like that, you have to be the best at least that is the way i felt when i did computers leaving cert i think that they are called GCSE'S over in England.
JoyceP glad to see you getting around even if it is the dog that is in control.
Sharon you will soon feel more relaxed here when you get to know the people and i assure you that you could not find a nicer group someone will know how you feel as they will have gonethrough the same thing some time. Elaine it must be a relieve to know that you have transport to get you and your husband to the hospital and back. Hope that things go well.
Sue it takes time to ajust to life again after such a trauma but once you do life will improve greatly for you try to stay focused in the future and the happy times ahead.
Hope everyone else is keeping well, Carole hope that your friend feels well soon. Maria in bed all day, to-day.
Love and ((((hugs)))) to everyone.
Betty.

Hi all, I spoke with the dv woman today who says that if I need to go to the refuge my rent will be paid. She understands my situation completely as I emailed her at length on Sunday night. O.h. is different again today, and left me a note when he went to work saying if I would still go on holiday with him, he would leave it to me to sort out the dates etc. This is what started the first row on Thursday evening, when he couldn't grasp what I was saying and was upset cos I was suggesting a slight variation by two days on the dates possible. He just can't cope with any change to things, if I say anything to him it is set in stone and he gets upset if I try to alter something or be flexible. If we decide to go out, which is very rare these days as he works 6 days a week from choice not necessity and then does diy or gardening etc on Sundays, he will ask for a definite time we will be leaving and if I say when I am ready or an approximate time, he gets upset. If I give a definite time he is never ready and I often sit outside in the car, waiting for him to finish what ever he is faffing about with and then make his final trip to the loo, then he will dither about whether he has his credit cards or whatever with him, so back in he goes. His family know to tell him an hour earlier than a real time apptmt so he has always been like this, but yells at me if I don't say an exact time.
And he thinks I have problems lol!
Anyway I had told him I planned to discuss with Dawn my options for leaving and he said he didn't want me to go but if that was the only way I thought I would get peace then I had to do what I thought best. He hasn't asked me about this when he got home at 10.30 pm.
I will be talking to the counsellor today, Tues. I feel better tho because Dawn told me if I ever feel I want to leave she will help me through it and find me a place, and help sort out the funding etc as well as get my things out of here. She said she is available day or night so I feel glad there is a safety net, and will stay here for the mo while I try to sort out my house so I can go there. I have talked to the local Council who have things in place to help me move back too, like grants for the heating and such.
Meantime I just have to keep sorting out my stuff and getting rid when I can cope with it. At least this week he is at work from 2pm to 10 pm so I have some space.
Love and hugs to everyone who is struggling with whatever demons. Joyce, enjoy your walks with Toby lol he sounds great!
Kathy, thanks hon for the call, was good to chat.
For the pms and messages, thanks you are a brill lot.
Will try and get on top of all the posts soon.
Love
Lizxxxx

morning everyone ,liz ive ust read your post i will catch up with you latter i promise ,well ive been up since 5 this morning ,running loo nerves i think am a ltlle shakey but im coping so i will catch up with you all later whaen we get back from hospital thank you for all your pms and good whishes deanna ,carole,liz catch you later as im of now to spend another 10 mins on loo lol hugs all xxx elaine xxx

Morning one and all,xxx
Decided to post a little earlier before my trials and tribulations start for the day.
Toby has spoken to me and requested that I take my life in my hands and go further afield on our first walk of the day..little does he realise that yesterday almost did me in!!!!!
At the moment I have my survey map out and searching for terrain which is not too hilly...have packed some sandwiches and a bottle of water (water for him, I'm taking something stronger), two inhalers, pain killers and have borrowed a walking stick from my neighbour, think that's my lot?... all I need now are a couple of porters.. one to carry me and one to handle the dog lead and carry food.... any offers..
How about you Sue, fancy doing walkabouts with me, much more to see than the inside of a hospital.. I am surrounded by foxes, squirrels, horses and other wildlife, nature at it's best..
It would be a case of you support me and vice versa..lol.
Off to get my breakfast now but will look in on you all later... for those still in their bed, wakey, wakey..for those in pain, start popping the pills, those in need of a cry, try laughing instead and those wishing to bash me over the head..be my guest xxxx

Love you all to bits,

JoycePxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Going out today so will see you all when I get home.

Joyce P, have a lovely day I would never hit you love.
WELL... not hard anyway!

Elaine , can't wait to hear your good news, when you get back.

Everyone else.... have a great day.
Love,
Deanna XX

Morning all - I awoke to the sound of engines on the road. Apparently the people across from me had a flooded basement and now the road is being excavated!! Had to get our vehicles out of the drive pronto or I'd be stuck here for the day.

Today's crisis ; my daughter is still waiting for March's child support, and April of course. She called the Family Responsibility office who oversee support payments and they can't locate her ex as of today. They had 4 different phone numbers and each one is defunct. We had 2 more and they are defunct also. They have issued a "trace" order and if he doesn't payup for March he will be thrown in jail. Although the rotten side of me thinks it may do some good to scare the s--t out of him, the rational side of me realises it won't get any funds for his children.
He can't leave the country because they have taken his passport rights away (although now I think of it, I think he has a UK passport as they came to Canada when he was 14 from Belfast). He did say they (he and his pregnant girlfriend) were moving, but surely one should notify one's children if one moves, in case of emergency. How a man can leave 4 children basically with nothing and go off and create another child, is a topic for another time, but when I realise that at least 2 of the children will quickly need summer clothes - and shoes - to say nothing of being fed properly, and the fact that their mother is making herself sick worrying, I must not get myself into 'anxiety mode' or I'll be sunk for the day. Now's the time for action, so I'm outta here and going to vacuum up a storm to relieve some stress hopefully.
Have a good day all, thanks for letting me rant.
MAry

hi everyone sorry i carnt rember everyones names today im a bit stressed out ,well i managed to stay calm going to hospital with hubby this morning just a little shakey and head rattling ,ok were do i start meet with heart surgion went through all test results ,examination ,then for the news open heart within 12 weeks( 3 months )or on standby for a earler cancilation will only have one weeks notice ,he has to have two prosedeures done and will be in for up to 12 days ,i no how im feeling as you can imagine just want it all to go away ittle tearfull now so il be of gona have a brew and ciggie ill be bk on later catch up with you all then xx elaine xx oh by the way deanna hope you enjoyed your day and had a lovley time happy bday xx hugs

Elaine - sending hugs, well done going to the hosp, the surgery sounds as if it's in good hands, hang tight, you will get through this.
hugs
Mary

Hi everyone, Ive been out for a walk with our dog today just round the block, saturday the whole family went to the park, woods and lake near us. some of us went on bikes and some walked it was lovely. Been the charity shop again today been busy Ironing and pricing and stocking up, loved it back home now. Just putting me feet up having a cuppa the kids havent been home long. sorry to hear about your problems mary, Love to joyce, Deana, Elaine,Liz,Betty,janet, Sue,carole, caz ,Mary, and anyone else I forgot to mention.

Well done Elaine, you did it, hope you are feeling a bit better by now. Tears are natural and healing for what you have gone through today, just think of how well your hubby will feel when this is over.
Sue, please don't think your problems are nothing compared to others, they are your problems and obviously affect you. You are like me in that you are in constant pain and only go out for medical appointments, I can't go for a walk though. I find that hard to cope with at times but I have my friends on here, they keep me up when I am down and will do the same for you. We have plenty of laughs now, didn't at the beginning, but we know someone will be there for us when we need them, and for you now.
Mary you never have it easy do you, hope your daughter gets her money soon, I used to have the same problem with my ex, it's not funny at all.

I haven't time for any more, hubby just arrived home, my sister has been again all day but she was earlier than usual and threw me. I have my usual hospital check up tomorrow and pick my next chemo up so I won't be on till late.
Oh last week when I had my blood test for rhumatoid arthritis, doc said he would only contact me if the blood showed anything. I got an appointment yesterday to go see him, in August, I know it's a very busy clinic but blimey.

Hope you have all had an ok day.

Caz xx

Hi everyone
Just to let you all know that I am thinking about you and hoping today's problems will be a little less tomorrow.
Have any of you seen the advert on mental health? Whoever wrote it did a brill job.
Well done to all of you who have moved forward by whatever means, my target just now is finishing my kitchen
Love to everyone
Janet

Mary... not again?

I would love to sit with some fathers who believe that when they leave home, the become EX FATHERS.... what exactly they think being a father means?

I agree, a stint in jail would do him the world of good, but would do Colleen and the kids no good at all.

Elaine I am so proud of you. I know what it took, but when you got there... you fine right?
The news looks good for your husband, and I am even hoping for a cancellation so that he is seen to quicker. Bless him it will make so much difference to him... and you!

I had a lovely meal out thank you.
there were 6 of us, and Lisa and Jon would not allow my son to go Dutch.
So he bought the drinks, all of which were soft... and I drink tap water... I'm such a CHEAP DATE.... then after, he insisted on paying for the sweets.
The young ones had a giant ice cream pud to share between two.... GIAGANTIC they were.
Allan and I had the smallest pud in the world. a tiny little chocolate mouse, about the size of an eggcup.... but you would love it. ;-0)

Sharon, it sounds lovely working in the charity shop.
My little friend... who took me out to dinner today used to have a Saturday and holiday job in Oxfam, before she went to uni... she dressed herself from it!
She now has a fantastic job, and plenty of money.... but give her a fiver and she is straight into the charity shops to find herself a bargain.
She will never change, which is why we love her so much.
All her new clothes are bought by her OH, he spends the money himself otherwise she would be out getting a whole summer wardrobe for £20!! ;-0)

Janet, where did you read that Mental health thing?
I would love to read it too.

Caz, I hope you manage tomorrow when you go for your Chemo pills love.
You are doing so well Caz.. you are even more cheerful that you were a few weeks ago, well you are.... X

On a lighter note girls.... and I want Joyce P to read this too.
I went to the toilet in the restaurant... and as I got up....
My knicker elastic broke!! ;-0(
I tell you folks.... if there's a wrong way to do it!!

Have a great evening and I will see you in the morning.
Love to Carole, Sue, Ann, Ann GG, and all the folks I've missed.

Deanna XX

what a couple of days we have had between us!
Elaine pleased you were okay at hospital, it's the getting out of home thats worse, do you find that?

Mary ex son in law needs a kick up his a***. Go get him! xx

Look s like some are taking to keep fit with long walks! Good on you Joyce xx

Sue no matter how much or little your pain it's your's! Don't compare it to others xx

Janet here is your name! I'm looking for you! xx

And Ann GG, Kathy, Liz, Ben. Dave, Malc, Deanna,
Betty, Sharon, Ann, Gail, Eleanor, Joy, Jules, Caz C,
xxxx