General Chat

Thanks Jeanette did'nt realise it was an old thread DOH!! Love Helenxx

Hi David!! i tried to pm you!! have you blocked me!! lol i do hope not Love Helenxx

Helen Have you tried to contact David by clicking on his name at the top of this thread? This is his old member number that he deleted a while ago Jeanette x

I have to say,I have probably been a little naive in the past,but Im learning,slowly:-))

I've been wanting to nudge this for about a week Lynda - glad you have done it !!! Maz. XX

Hope you don't mind me reviving this one David, I think the heading says it all :))

CB That's a thought I hadn't thought of alcohol as a possible reason. These things always used to happen on a weekend, bit early this week. thank you for seeing me as confident. must be something to do with the way I write as Sally thought I was a teacher. I can tell you I am not inwardly a confident person but through attending many many courses at work I know how to appear confident. i also have quite a good commnd of the English language (even if my typing lets me down sometimes) I don't remember you disagreeing with my views although i am sure you must have at some time, we can't all always agree, how boring that would be. Ann Glos

Nudging for me mate Julie xxx

CB, re your last sentence, that hadn't occurred to me at all - seriously. David, you put your thread header so well. Okay, so Mike was more forthright than I'd be, but I don't think he deserved this. If only the yellowbellies that are the culprits could be named and shamed, but they'll go too far one of these days and as they say, what goes around, comes around.

Ann, Thank you for your reply. I take your point about the intent behind posts lacking the subtlety of an accompanying gesture or facial expression, but there seem to be lots of people who will read slights or innuendo into innocent words. Without wishing to insult you in any way, I would never have imagined from your posts that you are lacking in confidence. On the contrary, you seem to speak with good sense and some authority. Please take that as a compliment, in spite of the fact that I don't always agree with you. I have no axe to grind with Mike or anyone else. The GR Board is just not that important to me. My feelings about GR members are coloured purely by my own interaction with them, and not by the opinions of others. Mike got on the wrong side of me initially and has never done anything to make me change my opinion of him, but it's not something that worries me, and as I don't share his interests, I just naturally avoid him. That doesn't mean I wanted GR to suspend him. I've never asked for anyone to be suspended, and only twice in my 10 months of membership have I complained to GR about threads I found offensive, neither of which originated from Mike Chambers. I too feel it is unfair for people to be goaded, and I'm always amazed at how many people join in when someone is 'under fire', but I never seem to see the full story, as I'm rarely here throughout an entire evening, when most of these issues blow up. I often wonder how much of the discord here during the evenings is fuelled by alcohol. CB >|<

David It looks like you got the lucky thread about Mike lol all mine have gone Paul

CB I take your point but, some people come over as being abrasive/acid when writing on these boards and I am sure they don't mean to be. When I was working one of my annual reports said I was too brusque so i imagine i come over like that sometimes. What the report didn't know or chose not to acknowledge was that the brusqueness hid my lack of confidence. If we know someone has a short fuse is it fair to goad them until they 'lose it' and say something in haste that looks bad written down but would be moderated by body language (a wry smile or a shrug or a supplicating gesture)? No, I feel this was done deliberately to make Mike look bad by people who were out to 'get' him in return for what they perceived as past slights. I agree that 8 weeks is much too long, I feel a verbal warning followed by a 4 week ban, then an 8 week ban if it happens again would be more fair. I do believe somebody has cut and pasted the offending thread and is going to send it to GR (and no it is not me) for them to look at it thoroughly. Ann Glos

Well said Julie! There is too much of this type of childish behaviour going on with this site. Some people seem to get too embroiled and take it all too seriously.

Wow this is really getting daft. Are we back at school? Well I for one think Mike being suspended is pathetic, we are all grown ups and as such have differing opinions. Are there really nasty emails and MSN bickering going on. I am only on here 9 to 5 usually (don't tell the boss) so I miss a lot of this I thought Mike seemed a nice guy so if that means I am going in a little black book of people to be ignored or mistreated then there are two things you all need to know. 1. My name is JULIE 2. I don't care Julie xxx

Sticking my neck out here, as I didn't see the thread(s) that are being referred to above, so others may feel I have no right to comment, but I agree that 8-week suspensions are too long. If GR feel it necessary to suspend someone for 'breaking the rules', four weeks should be the maximum, in my opinion. However, if anyone's interested in MY honest, no-holds-barred opinion on the subject of this thread - as someone whose first encounter with Mike Chambers was his very rude response to a simple, polite question regarding him possibly living near where some of my ancestors were born, I didn't think much of him from the outset. I've seen a few other abrasive remarks he's made which also haven't exactly endeared him to me, but I can live with that. On the other hand, I do agree he's made many constructive comments and put up some threads that have interested lots of people, so I can understand others wanting to support him. I think it's pathetic to 'wind up' other Board members, but they don't have to respond and make things worse - but if you're the one 'targeted', then only you can decide how you react and you need to be sure that offence is intended before you do - 'mountains and molehills' spring to mind. I think it's silly to brand groups of people as 'cliques' if they happen to share opinions, neither do I think it's fair that people who disagree with others should be singled out, insulted or hounded, but the way in which they 'voice' that disagreement DOES matter. There is no excuse for insults or rudeness. Of course, a bit of teasing goes on, but if the 'target' is offended, then it hurts nobody to offer an apology, publicly or privately, which I think should be accepted with good grace. Surely that's the way adults behave. I've said before on this Board that I think lots of bad feeling between GR members is engendered on other sites, and from what I've seen here, I'm glad I've never joined any of them. As far as gossip goes 'behind the scenes' on GR (or privately), I doubt there are many members who haven't indulged in that at one time or another. CB >|<

Soon everyone will realise who the culprits are. As said last night, a pattern is emerging and If I can see it soon others will....and be on their guard. Iv'e (along with others ) have been a victim in the past on these boards. I now watch my back for flying knives and if I find Im being sucked in, I try to stand back and look at the bigger picture. this way I can see what people are doing. I once thought I should leave after one such barney....then thought...why leave?....i'd cut my nose of to spite my face and the've won. Mike obviously broke guidelines rules, and was suspended for that. Rules are there for all of us. Im sad mike has been suspended. But I cant see that GR will reinstate him when others have had to do their time also. (Others who have been also provoked into a reaction) I do hope Mike comes back, maybe when he does after watching the boards for 8 weeks, he will see the way these people work, and be ready when they try to strike again. But next time methinks he'll go through the right channels to complain about those who are causing him so much trouble. (send all abusive mails and posts towards him to GR abuse) chin up Mike and we'll see you on your return Elaine x

I think you have got it one there Sam, sneaky, these people start off with a little dig at someone, nothing personal to start, then if that person respnds to it, they play the 'who me' card, and then you misunderstood me trick, then I don't want to offend anyone, then they try another tactic, but still chipping away. Then there other trick is to be soooooooo nice to everyone else, like look at me I am so good, so nice, so genuine!!!! it's happened to me, so I've sussed how they work, goodnness knows why they do it, but personaly I think it's because they have no real life and live there day to day life on the internet, so in fact they are very sad people, but not just sad VERY nasty, sad I can feel sorry for, nasty I have no time for. Perhaps, just perhaps, this thread can make people think about what they do, what they say, and stop there nasty tricks and clear off, but I doubt it. Lynda

Once again the constant goading and bullying of mindless idiots have resulted in a valued member of our board being suspended! Mike has been targeted from the very first time that he began posting threads so I hope that the people concerned are finally happy.... they have got the result that they so dearly wanted!! Bev

Debates are bound to offend someone! When I was 'got at' recently by a member who isn't brave enough to admit he's male, I just smiled to myself - he doesn't know me at all - and put him right on one or two matters before leaving that thread for good. There is NO WAY we are all going to be one happy gang, there are always those who wish to throw a spanner in the works, feel sorry for them, they probably haven't got much of a life! Most of you seem a very friendly lot and I,for one, enjoy our chats and exchange of ideas, but try not to get too emotionally involved. Lily

Yet again mindless idiots in the minority seem to have spoilt it for others.... Going on what I have read it's appaling to think that they can goad all they like and nothing happens to them.,... I so wish I knew who the culprits were!! AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!