General Chat

"its a Knockout" This gave our hero a thought and he pondered on this for a while. If there was a highland version of "Itsa Knockout" he could dress up and compeat in the games without harming his neeps tatties and onions. He could also hide in his costume and avoid

all the people he owed money to,mustn't let them no he won "plenty" on "Going for gold" and was now in line for

a million on Fridays lottery game :-D or the on line bingo or the 'orses at Newmarket or Epsom. Well a hero cannot live on neeps, tatties and onions alone so he

knew he had to speculate to accumalate,but knew he had to get back into show business but down the Dogs he went anyway and there he met "Del Boy" :-D and " Trigger" Then

Shot himself in the Foot,which made him limp :-D apart from hobbling,So borrowing a crutch from the first aid centre (Making somebody else Crutchless as well) he thought he would try the three legged race and see if he could win a few bob to pay his bills and fare back to the family hovel where he could

plan his next move and meet up again with BB FAlil and dear old nanny,
and

Then decided that if he moved a bit sharpish he could catch the "Last Train to San Fernando" thus missing all the big birds after him for the purpose of

them wishing to join in with him at " Come Dine with me" but he escaped
and then met up with the "Vicar of Dibley" and she




Merlin took ages to get on kept getting error message :-S

took her ages to answer the door,she kept making Errors when entering the key code :-D so she had to Submit to the indignity of climbing through the window to see who was there :-S When she got out side there he was just walking down the street singing from Hims Ancient and Modern I,ve hit the Road Dibbsy and I wont be

back cos out hero is going over the hill and far away,where he will meet uo with "The Liver Birds" and call at the pub for a pint and a packet of pork scatchings then he is of to ;-)

See the Wizard of OZ. But the Ozzies don,t want him (Trying to take foreign Bodies through Customs) so he returns to the site of his former bits of fluff :-D ( well large ones) and asks them if they think he stood a chance of going on a Celebrity Show and they replied

not on your nellie,you have to have some kind of talent and what have you got







haven't seem june around for ages

He said with pride :-D I,ve got my restored Neeps and Onions :-S a dead Haggis,A slight limp so I should stand a chance of being Long John Silver but I,ve got to get a

I Think she,s gone to look for the damaged Neeps Etc. ;-) ;-)

"Passport To Pimlico "to stand a chance of a scene test for any kind of part
he rather fancies a romantic lead with

Big Daddy, the midwife who helped when he became a Born again Christian,He had just taked a new course on rejuvination of Neeps. Onions and Tripe which is a dellicasy from ooop North. :-S so off he goes with his tongue hanging out and slavering at the thought of

B&B on the green green grass of home .eating big bikers good old scottish neeps & onions in a huge haggis pie .then he got

indigestion and

A lot of wind :-S which somehow seemed to deter people from going near to him :-S so off he went in search of a good deodorant to remove the offending pong. whilst doing this he came across (a very cross) Fagash Lil,who was steaming (Out of her nostrils) having been chasing him for ages to serve him with court papers for breach of promise (His Breaches were in a bit of a sorry state by now) seeing her he went hell for leather towards the sound of bells hoping to find sanctuary in the church,but little did he realise who would be waiting to trap him there,non other than

Big Bertha with her