General Chat

have GR appointed people then? I am well out of touch, I kept noticing all sorts of new things on the site, like people whos tree you access too it shows if they have update it and stuff... keep finding alsorts hidden a way that are new or I didnt know they were there... :-D

and neither has anyone else been appointed/endorsed to a status to do anything other than be a member of this site.

Morning all from a wet and miserable Aberdeen.

When I first ventured on to the chat boards I went into
say hello to a lovely bunch of nutters lolx and I was lucky
because I was made to feel welcome by the lovely Daff
and her chums <3 <3

Take the plunge and enjoy.

Emma x

Are the boards 'cliquey'? To be honest, yes they could appear to be so.

Many posters have shared experiences or history, and it could be daunting for a new poster to the boards to jump in. When I first posted on a thread a few years ago, although I was acknowledged politely, the thread died and a new one started by the various people who were chatting, instead of continuing on that one. It made me feel that I'd intruded on a private conversation. That put me off for some time.

But to anyone who is considering posting for the first time, I'd advise them to read the various threads until they find one they are 'comfortable' with and politely jump in, or to start one of their own.

There is a place on the Boards for everyone - the more the merrier. So come on into the water!

There are threads which might be 'perceived' as 'just between friends' ( not cliquey', that says much more about the person looking in than it does the people on the thread) But on an average page 1 that is maybe 2 threads at most?

Leaving plenty of others for a newbie to take the plunge on.

The first post on here doesn't have to be a chore lol, or establish who you are, mine was

"half-penny,one pence and 2 pence cadbury bars (yes that's old money) ,penny arrow toffee bars, and tiger tail bars, and barley sugar twists!" in reply to a post about 'pocketmoney sweets'..

Hardly earth shattering stuff lol.

Hi

Someone directed me to this thread, and also the one that Susan(numbers) started. They said I might find it interesting reading.

I've been away for a few days, so this is why I'm so late, and resurrecting an old thread.


You see .................. I did not post on Chat for years after I joined.

I joined in April 2004, started posting on the Help boards and even on General within a couple of weeks ........... but almost never on Chat

Why?

Well, the couple of times that I looked on there in the first few years (from about 2004 to 2009), it always seemed as if there was a riot going on ............... and the once or twice I posted on a thread, I was completely ignored.

It seemed that everyone knew everyone else ............... and yes, it did feel cliquey, and as if I, as a newcomer, was excluded.

But what is a clique?

In its simplest terms, a clique really is a group of people who have got to know each other over a period of time. In its worst sense, it is a group of people who have got together and plan nefarious activities.

It wasn't until about a year ago that I began to post on Chat ..............and even then there were hundreds of threads that I would read, and not have the nerve to post on


.................. and if you know me at all from the Help boards or from General, then you will know that I am not easily scared off, yet threads and people on Chat did, and still do, just that!


So, yes, Chat did, and probably still does, seem very unfriendly to newbies.

Question is ........... what can be done to make it friendlier, and bring new blood on to the board?


I have been a member of a national society for many more years that I care to count (probably since before Hayley was born :-D), and one of the things that I and the OH have always done at the annual meetings is to deliberately go up to newbies, most of them usually of student age, and introduce ourselves, and chat to them. We'll join "newbies" at the lunch break ......... and bring them into the fold.

We now, I suppose, count as a clique, bcause we have been in that group for so long, and know so many people, some of whom have become good friends over the years .......................... but WE put ourselves out to greet newbies.



May I dare to make the suggeston that it isn't up to newbies to this board to introduce themselves, but for the regulars to "meet and greet"?

Chat in the ealry days wasnt threaded as now and so moved faster as replies were misplaced and that made it hilarious but it was still an open board where anyone just hopped on board amongest regular posters...

I think that it appears to any new member looking in that approval from somewhere or someone is neeeded for them to post,,,but we're all at the same level as all other members,,,in that thats all we are a **paying member** regardless of time spent on site...no one has been given a supervisiors badge...

**New members dont feel you have to pass any jury to post on chat because you dont,,,,,,,only GR are in charge and can enforce any RULES on you.**

I would also add that I didn't have very happy experiences when I did start posting on Chat, and that is another reason why I am wary, and do not think of it as a "friendly" place.

As I said, I started posting about 2 years ago

I was ignored on a couple of threads ..... just as I had been 5 years earlier, but I persevered because people kept telling me that there were good threads and people on Chat.


I was told that I had no right to express an opinion on something-or-other as I was Canadian, so stop posting and go away (not so politely!).

Brits only wanted, obviously!

That happened a couple of times, so it was not a single experience


I felt disgusted .... and imagine what a newbie would feel seeing that remark!


I was accused of being someone else ............. and had no right to post under another name ............. the rationale there was rather strange

................ I was the other person because we posted at the same time, and also because we didn't post at the same time

For the record, I have never had another name on GR, and thus have never posted under another name



so Kay, there have been people on Chat trying to "police" the board, and rather nastily at that! There was some sort of jury keeping track .......... and boy oh boy did they pounce!


It's called discrimination in most circles of life

The "rules" I was given to understand were to not post anything that might annoy a Brit. Never express an opinion on life in Britain, politics, royalty or anything.


Nor am I the only non-Brit to have received this treatment.

I stick to a few threads where I have come to know people, and avoid a lot of other threads that might be very interesting, with posters who may well be very pleasant with some but have not seemed to be so to me.


It's all in the eye of the beholder of course!

How strange Sylvia that I have never in all the time I have been a member, been aware of any discrimination between Nationalities. Maybe I have been around with my eyes shut, or maybe it is because I am not on the boards UK time 10.30pm to 0830ish. I have only ever been aware of the interest shown about the way others live.

I have to say, if I spot a newbie I always welcome them to the boards. But in defence of those who don't, we have been through some very uncomfortable times when 'newbies' were actually 'oldies' who returned in disguise to cause mayhem. This created a feeling of distrust among members and some closed ranks. This mainly happened on the chat board and not usually gen board. It could be easier now that we are all on one board to keep abreast with what is happening.

As you know you have always been made welcome on any of my threads and my most recent thread (Has the heart gone out of the message boards) which tried to do almost the same as this one brought in some welcome 'new blood' who are still with us but mostly only on that thread.

A few good points made by Sylvia, but like Ann, I have never, in all the years on these boards witnesses any discriminatory posts toward anyone not in UK. However, I never posted on the old chat, and I will admit, that WAS very cliquey, and the one time I did pluck up courage to post on there I was told to get back to general, I didn't belong there.

Fortunately there was nothing like that on general, or the new chat, and now on general chat. (For newer people looking in, we used to have the General board, and a Chat board that was just a single thread, then GR changed it to General and Chat, which were both the same, now they have combined the two)

Quoting Sylvia on one point..."May I dare to make the suggeston that it isn't up to newbies to this board to introduce themselves, but for the regulars to "meet and greet"?"

How? We don't know they are there until they post? :-D

To be fair, and you can check on my posts if you want, I and many others have always welcomed newbies to the boards once they've taken the plunge and posted...or as I've often put it, 'welcome to the madhouse, we're all gaga here but don't let that put you off '

I've seen a few generalisations about nationalities but never seen any real discrimination - I don't know where most people live let alone what nationality they are, although Sylvia, I thought I'd seen you post that you *were* British.

Have to agree with Ann, TW and Uggers and say I've never seen anyone be told that it's a Brits only board...granted I don't read every thread every day.....but it's certainly not something I'd ever imagine happening on the old General or Chat boards.....all nationalities chat without boundaries as far as I've seen ..must've been a rogue WUM rather than a regular poster...that's all I can think x

My first post was about our fiftieth wedding anniversary, and the number of congratulations we received amazed me. I now post when and where I feel an interest, and occasionally start a thread, some of which are ignored, some keep going. I have now met a few, made a good friend in Jude, who lives not far from us and is coming for coffee this morning, But it doesnt take long to get to 'know' people and find those you connect with. For some of us this site is a lifeline to laughter and sometimes commonsense. Newbies, do join in and dont be afraid of being ignored, it happens to all of us from time to time. <3 <3

Most of the time everyone gets along, but I'd agree with Sylvia - there have been occasions when someone living outside of GB has been told their comments regarding something essentially British weren't welcome.

Personally, I find that points of view from another perspective should be welcome.

The old general board was once a very groupie board. and to just jump in on a thread with wit or comment wasnt the done thing old bean !,,,,,,I know I got told that when I ventured onto a thread back in Feb 2003 it was then called -Members Board of Genes Connect ..so I let membership run out.....very unwelcoming lot and seemed to have a leader who called the shots and so so serious....

I shall try and pick my words with care :-D which may be difficult since I'm wrecked today lol, still couging and also up at 4 chasing a mouse round the house :-0



I HAVE seen, as Sylvia says, a degree of 'unfriendliness' towards some posters from other countries, of the 'you don't live here, so you don't know' variety.... that must be very annoying for those who live overseas yet take an interest in world affairs generally...and the 'Old Country' in particular :-)

that has on occasion worked the other way too, but as many of you know it won't matter whether I live 'there' or not I will still comment if I feel I might know something about it worth saying ( debateable lol).

No one should have to prove they are not 'someone else' , but unfortunately that has often been the case thanks to a small number of people who will insist on causing trouble by posing as 'new' to settle old scores or just to cast suspicion. Just lately we don't seem to be having that problem , maybe the protagonists have grown weary of the game? I do hope so.

I dare say there will be new members to replace all of US current 'oldies' who post a lot lol, so 'Welcome' to them, please post :-D

Just been looking back at posts in 2002/3 and thought this one posted on 9 July 2003 was appropriate for this thread Lol!!

Any chance of having 2 members boards, one for the clicky lot, and one where you actually stand a chance of getting a word in edgeways?


Plus ca change plus sa meme chose (or something like that - nothing changes.

Interesting that it seems to have been a year before the boards were chat boards, originally it seems to have been mainly genealogy chat and confusion!

Ann - just goes to show, 'nothing changes', lol!

I actually think the board is less cliquey now than it was in those (early) days.

Well maybe I'm not so easily offended (thicker skinned) than others, but I've never seen any negative comments about someone's nationality. Perhaps it just all goes over my head ;-)

If you put up the word 'newbies' in the search box, and search through a few pages, you'll find a few threads welcoming newbies to the boards and asking them to introduce themselves. In fact, Rose herself has put a couple of them up. Unfortunately they do run their time and slip off the page eventually...but you only have to look. So to say it's up to us to welcome newbies...well I think we fulfilled that one :-D

Again I agree with you TW, I don't think we are so bad!

Sheila I agree with you too. In the old days on the old style chat it took me ages to 'break in' to a conversation, and being a slower typist than some my answers were always a long way behind and therefore ignored. However, I did persevere and enjoyed a lot of laughs with the likes of Colin and Grandpa Jim, but yes that style chat board had the potential to be a perceived clique.