General Chat

I'm having a really nice time with my sister...Went girlie shopping yesterday...We are going out for a chinese meal this evening...She will be going home tomorrow morning... :S

Jules x

Don,t forget the "Attachment to earnings" when he leaves the Army and goes travelling he could be hard to find .Pension will no doubt be paid into his Bank Account,get that sorted and it should be paid to you Direct from there,also you should be entitled to a percentage of his pension. Anyway,As everyone says Do It and Do It Now. take care.**M**.

Jules
what great news to read that you had the courage to stand in a shop and whilst maintaining your dignity you calmly dealt with a very difficult situation. You have had a lot of advice from your cyber friends and we will keep encouraging you all the way.
I hope you do not mind the list I am now going to give you.

1. without mentioning any names etc I asked my Army son who is an senior officer what would a woman do in similar cercumstances as your self.
He suggested the following much of which has already been given to you.
1. Buy a note book for just this situation and each write everything you have mentioned on here. do this as soon as possible
1.Date OH told me he was leaving me etc.
2. Date of any comments messages and clearly write what happened. Try to remain clear in your mind so it is acurate.
3. Write who you spoke to each department and the info they gave you. for exampel who told you that the Army could not help you and why.
4. Who told you you had to leave your home and would not or could not give you advice.
5. What date you spoke to the housing departemnt and who you spoke to.
6. Date and time of recent meeting in puplic and what was said. (you may also ask the manager of the shop if they keep the records on camera for that day , your husband my be on there and t you should be able to use this as evidence

You are coping very well, and if you need any more support just PM me.

Take Care and concentrate on the positive in your life.

Bridget

13.31 hrs Spain

Jules
what great news to read that you had the courage to stand in a shop and whilst maintaining your dignity you calmly dealt with a very difficult situation. You have had a lot of advice from your cyber friends and we will keep encouraging you all the way.
I hope you do not mind the list I am now going to give you.

1. without mentioning any names etc I asked my Army son who is an senior officer what would a woman do in similar cercumstances as your self.
He suggested the following much of which has already been given to you.
1. Buy a note book for just this situation and each write everything you have mentioned on here. do this as soon as possible
1.Date OH told me he was leaving me etc.
2. Date of any comments messages and clearly write what happened. Try to remain clear in your mind so it is acurate.
3. Write who you spoke to each department and the info they gave you. for exampel who told you that the Army could not help you and why.
4. Who told you you had to leave your home and would not or could not give you advice.
5. What date you spoke to the housing departemnt and who you spoke to.
6. Date and time of recent meeting in puplic and what was said. (you may also ask the manager of the shop if they keep the records on camera for that day , your husband my be on there and t you should be able to use this as evidence.

You are coping very well, and if you need any more support just PM me.

Take Care and concentrate on the positive in your life.

Bridget

13.31 hrs Spain

Jules Thank you Thank you ........I,ve had a terrible 24 hours but you made me laught and so Thank you .....

I can so see him flapping around swearing and doing "his nut" in the shop while you stand there and watch ...what a silly billy!!

Good for you making yourself look good ...not that you dont but you looked so good you felt good to ..well done makes all your other problems seem ..........not so bad!

What goes round comes round let him "enjoy" hahhaha his trip

I expect he means to sort out the financial side - in other words he thinks he can bully you and get a better deal for himself. Go for it girl, get all the law says you are entitled to and a bit extra if you can!!

It gave me great pleasure seeing him suffering yesterday..that makes me sound horrible but like they say what goes around comes around..He has bought it on himself as he was the one that left me...
He put me through hell but that has made me stronger....I am now the person I was before I met him and it feels real good!!!
Just had a phone call from my sister she said Pat txt her last night and said that he wanted to sort things out between ourselves (Money etc) and not involve a solicitor....He also said to her that I looked really good and that I had a nice brown colour (Been sunbathing)....How does he expect to get divorced without a solicitor...Whats wrong with the man!!

I'm off shopping now to get some nice food for when my sister arrives tonight...

Love Jules x :D

See Jules you can do it. Take Chris's advice and take care of yourself too.
Love Mary xx

Nice one Jules, bet he is shocked to the core to see you coping and better than he is by the sounds of things.

You keep fighting for your rights and you will come out on top.

love
Lizxx

Well done Jules. You've found the strength to face up to him once, and you can keep doing it. He was probably shocked that you had the nerve to answer him in the way you did. Always remember to act the lady, and it will get to him.
Proud of you girl!!!
xx

Hello Jules......good on yeh girl:o)) But do as Chris says......its very important:o))

Take care
love jude xx

Good on you girl :D Showed him you are dignified.
Definitely better off without a bully like that.
Still keeping fingers crossed for you and Buddy.

Cath xx

I think he thinks by traveling around and not having an address he wont be able to give me any money as people wont know where he is..He normally uses his dads address for most things...Besides the army will have contact addresses when he leaves for his pension!!

Jules x

Jules - good to keep the texts, keep everything. Write down in detail all that has happened - dates, places/times e.g Christmas Day - then when you find a solicitor you will have everything you need. Do this now whilst you have access to your PC and print off 2 copies at least.

No use thinking you will remember everything when you visit solicitor you won't.

If you have have to attend Dr as a result of this - print it.

If you have not, as yet, seen your MP and also City Councillor - do it NOW.

Later could be too late. Don't know who they are - google or ring nearest town/city hall.

It will be difficult for your OH to dispute if it is in black and white. Expect him to fight dirty - so fight back - be like the Scouts - be prepared. Do not be like several friends of mine who moan after divorce that they should have done this, done that - too late then.

Thanks , I haven't got a solicitor yet..I was waiting until I move as I don't know where I will be..I have kept all the txts hes sent me, some are nasty....I nearly felt sorry for him but couldnt bring myself too!!

Julesx :D

Please do what Chris suggestes Jules.

I expect you already have tried this - but have you tried SAAFA? You are still an army wife. You are definitely better off without him. Proud of you that you kept your dignity. Inform your solicitor of this event with full details, date, time and place and keep a copy

Jules , well done , see you have come out the better person,
l wish you all the happiness you deserve for the future............keep looking good , it will make you feel better :D ;-)

Jules
See. You can be so strong. Well done for not losing your cool.

This will all come right one day, then you can look forward to some great times with Buddy.

Thinking of you.

Gwyn x

You will never guess who i bumped into in WH Smiths?? My so called husband...I asked him how he was and he said not to good...He looked awful, he had bloodshot eyes was unshaven and scruffy....and still fat!!
He said he is going to get a camper van when he leaves army in Oct and travel around the UK and Europe...
He asked for my new mobile number and I said I wasn't going to let him have it...He then asked if he could come and collect his things, I said when I move out he could...(I have all the keys as the army housing gave them to me)..I asked him about the money for the I pad that he got in my name online at christmas, he said he will pay it but needs my mobile number to arrange it in Oct...I told him that he would have to go through my solicitor...He then went mad in front of people, he said F-ing Bo****ks, you can F-ing stuff your solicitor, you are being nasty and unreasonable, then he stormed off!!!

I was really proud of myself for standing up to him, I was cool, calm and collected and didn't swear or raise my voice....And I had made an effort this morning and looked pretty good, even if I say so myself...

He is probably plotting his revenge right now but you know what I don't really care, there is nothing he can do to me that he hasn't already..He can have the gas, elec, phone etc cut off but I can pay them myself if I have to!! I

Sorry it's so long...

Love Julesxx :D