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Carers Anonymous Meeting

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Huia

Huia Report 6 Sep 2009 21:57

This thread is slipping. While I dont have the same need for it now, I am sure it will be helpful to others.

I decided to mow the lawns the other day, something Phil has always done, but I couldnt start the mower. Our son came up from Rotorua yesterday to visit his dad so when we got back from the hospital son started the mower and did a bit (the easy bit!) but I insisted on doing the rest as he had a long journey home. Boy, did I ever get a sweat up. Not that I have finished the mowing yet. I plan to get a mower that is easier to start. And I still have to get rid of 2 barrow loads of grass clippings.

I have always said that women should know how to do jobs that their husband normally does, just in case they are left widowed or whatever. I was going to keep a notebook with instructions on how to do things, also one on cooking and cleaning for my husband to do if I am the one that goes first. I never did get around to writing things up.

Huia.

Huia

Huia Report 7 Sep 2009 07:55

I managed to start the mower myself this afternoon, on about the 20th pull of the cord.
Did more mowing, but once again it would not stop when I pushed the lever to stop so I had to pull the cap thing off the spark plug. Boy did it give me a kick this time!
I have sent a message to my son asking if there is an easier and less painful way to stop it.

Huia.

Sharron

Sharron Report 7 Sep 2009 10:35

Sounds like it running on because the mixture is too rich and that is why it will not start.There,that impressed you didn't it!Is there no beginning to my talents?

Has it been serviced lately?

Our mate does the garden and mows the lawn.He is not much of a cook so I make things for him and another guy who is an obsessive cleaner and decorator.He scrubbed my kitchen floor(which resembled a chicken run)on Saturday.He can call again,anytime!

Huia

Huia Report 7 Sep 2009 10:46

Yes, Sharron, it is not too many months ago that we had the mower in for servicing so it should be ok, but then I dont know what my husband might have done to it since then.
Huia.

Sharron

Sharron Report 7 Sep 2009 11:00

Whatever other faculties they lose,they never lose the ability to bugger up machinery do they?

Carburettor tweaking is extremely important to men,I wouldn't mind betting he has been fiddling with it while you were not looking.

You can be sure he left it perfect and that it is entirely your fault it will not start!

Huia

Huia Report 7 Sep 2009 19:47

Actually, Sharron, the last few times Phil used the mower he had difficulty starting it and it would sometimes stop on him, so he seemed to have lost some of his mechanical know-how. My main complaint is the nasty shock it gave me when I tried to stop it last time. Although that complaint isnt too far behind the one of wearing out my arm trying to start it. I might trade it in on a newer model if I can find one that is not too difficult to start.
Huia.

Huia

Huia Report 7 Sep 2009 19:51

Bob, where are you? I hope all is going well with you 'up there' (north of the big smoke). Please dont stay away too long.

As you can see from my postings my big worry now is not Phil but his mower!



Huia.

Bob85

Bob85 Report 7 Sep 2009 22:42

Huia
Sorry to hear of your mower problems. There is nothing more frustrating in life for the time when the piece of equipment that saves you time and effort decides to do its own thing. I used to think that mowers were the worst. But now cars and their drivers are something else! Read on!

Yesterday I was involved in a head-on collision! That's Bad.
It was not on the motorway! That's Good.
It was on the drive to our apartment! That's HILARIOUSLY BAD.
I was driving a Volvo S80! That's Good.
The neighbour was driving a turbo VW coupe! That's Bad.
I was going uphill. That's Good! She was going downhill! That's Bad.
I was travelling fairly slowly! That's Good. She was travelling fairly fast! That's Bad.
I saw her zooming around the bend! That's Good (or maybe Bad). She did not see me! That's very very Bad.
I had one-two seconds to think "This is Bad"! That's Good. I did not know what she was thinking! That is Bad.
We both stopped on impact! That's Good.
Her air-bags did not activate! That's Bad.
Both mine did! That's Good.
I sat like a stunned mullet! That's Good. She sat like a stunned mullet! That must be Good as well.
My cab filled with smoke! That's Bad. It gradually cleared That's Good.
Bits and pieces had fallen of her VW! That's Bad.
The Volvo seemed undamaged! That's Good.
The AA don't handle such events! That's Bad.
We are both insured with the same company! That's Good.
The Claims clerk rang the towing company! That's Good.
She did not give them the street number! That's Bad.
My engine would no longer start! That's Bad.
An isolation switch pervents this! That's Good.
Her engine sounded like a food-mixer! That's Bad.
It was only the plastic fan! That's Good.
He could not get the Volvo out of "Park"! That's Bad.
He lifted the plastic cover and activated the release switch! That's Good.
Both cars had to go on the same truck! That's Bad.
To the same panel beater. That's Good.
He has rung to say the key won't work anything! That's Bad.
He will ring the dealers for Help Help Help! That's Good.
Got a little sore chest! That's Bad.
Got that off my chest and will probably see the doctor! That's Good.

Bob
Hey I bet you all thought that I was at Accident and Emergency and that would have been Very Very Bad.

Huia

Huia Report 8 Sep 2009 00:34

Wow, Bob, and I thought I had troubles!
Nice to know you are ok, apart from a little sore chest (mine would be more than little) and apart from your poor Volvo. Best of luck with the insurance, I hope they dont decide to reject your claim!
Huia.

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 8 Sep 2009 01:16

Hi Huia, hope you can get a safer and easier mower so you don't have to dice with death with the old one, hate to think of you having a nasty mishap while on your own.

Bob, what a tale of woe. i should send your ditty to the Insurance company, it might brighten their day and get them to work faster on the claim. Hope everything sorts itself out soon, bet your neighbour had a red face and will take it slower next time.
Hope your chest isn't too sore and no major damage done to yourself and her. Arnica is good for bringing out a bruise.

take care
Lizxxx

~~~~~~to Sharron, Huia, Bob and all

Sharron

Sharron Report 8 Sep 2009 10:13

Morning.

Have been thinking about your mower Huia,nothing better to concern me I suppose.

Well,you need a lump of wood to stop it biting you if you have to knck the cap off the plug again,and I really hope you don't have to.A skilled mower mechanic ,(trained tweaker!) will probably go twiddle,twiddle and,within moments,have it running like a dream,purely to make you feel inadequate!

Is Phil somewhere else while you are mowing?Dad's girlfriend had to be watched at all times or she would be gone.Crossing the main road was one of her favourites,without looking and I once had a woman arrive with a van load of shrubs she had been persuaded to order.So,so wearing!

Huia

Huia Report 8 Sep 2009 11:45

Sharron, Phil has been in the Mental Health Secure Unit at hospital for 3 or 4 weeks now. He went in to be assessed for permanent secure care. They are trying to get his meds right to control his 'behaviour' before he can go into a rest home. Re crossing roads, when Phil stayed with his sister for 4 days in Feb while I did other things, she was alarmed at the way he would look one way but not the other and just blithely step onto the road. She is on a very busy road. When I was driving, at an intersection he would look left and tell me it was ok to go, but there was often something coming from the other direction. Just as well I ignored him!

Huia.

Sharron

Sharron Report 8 Sep 2009 12:24

Hard part is remembering to ignore them isn't it? Ellen had been a hospital receptionist for all of her working life and never lost the habits.If the phone rang I had to be quick to answer it before she did because she sounded like a very efficient receptionist if she picked it up but I would never have known what message they might have left.

It's not really rest that your Phil needs is it?It is a good workout every day.Let us hope there is somebody there who will find the time to keep him active.

Meantime,you just make sure you have a damned good rest!

Huia

Huia Report 8 Sep 2009 22:20

What Phil needs is a good long hike. He has been used to going with friends from 10am to about 3 pm. Now he is just shuffling along thanks to the meds. They do apparently take him for a walk of about 20 mins but due to staff shortage that is all they can manage. They have also had him helping in the garden. Not sure what they have been doing but probably not enough for him.

I am off to visit him again today. First I have to do the dishes that have been sitting in the sink for a couple of days! He used to wash the dishes, he decided it was his job when he retired 14 yrs ago.

Huia.

Sharron

Sharron Report 9 Sep 2009 08:56

Yes,I have the old model of dishwasher as well.I had my dad out there drying up within acouple of days of coming home.I always washed and he dried.Then,one day,I was doing something upstairs and had not washed up and OH came up to say he had come home and put the washing up away.I thought how odd it was to put dirty washing up away but it seemed the old man had been out and washed up as well as drying.That is what he does now.

Surely people who need to be in these caring environments should be encouraged to do what they can that is familiar to them.Does that make sense?What I mean is that familiar routine is reassuring.

Huia

Huia Report 9 Sep 2009 10:33

Yes, Sharron. It is rather disturbing to visit Phil and find him just sitting (not something he did much at home) or shuffling aimlessly around. But then when he wanted to help me he was often more of a nuisance than a help as I had to keep an eye on things, but I still let him do it so he felt useful, e.g. rubbing the butter into the flour and sugar for a cake I make (I gave him a pastry cutter thing so he could chop it in, I found he got it nice and fine even though it did take longer than I would have got it rubbing in by hand). I cant see the hospital wanting half a dozen patients in the ward helping with all sorts of jobs.

Huia.

Sharron

Sharron Report 9 Sep 2009 14:09

I believe Ellen kind of helped on the ward when we first had her sectioned.I don't really know what she did,probably taking cups of tea to people and that sort of thing I would think.Maybe having the patients doing all sorts of little jobs would pay dividends,but we will never know.

I have always felt that the clients in old peoples homes should be allowed to do more toward their comfort.After all,most go into homes because they can't cope with everything they have to do to live.They can still do some of it.

Jean (Monmouth)

Jean (Monmouth) Report 9 Sep 2009 19:29

In the army hospitals in the 50's, up patients were allowed to help with taking meals out, sometimes with the ward cleaning. In the cottage hospital where I last worked, patients were encouraged to do the flowers , help with beds and do a little dusting. It also was the norm in the army for occupational therapy, and in the first hspital I ever worked in ther was a department where there were looms, leather work modelling and other handicrafts. It was a long stay hospital. I still have a scarf that I wove and a wallet that I sewed while accompanying patients to their sessions. Short stays as they are now there is no call for this, unless you need full time care. Then the system seems to break down now.

Sharron

Sharron Report 9 Sep 2009 20:24

I was told by a man whose son had brain damage that Haslar Hospital,where the staff were officers,adopted the same bullying tactics as I do.His son was forced to learn to swallow by having orange juice squirted in his mouth until he did.
It seems the stroke victims who are looked after'properly'die qiute quickly or never regain much use of their limbs etc.

Huia

Huia Report 9 Sep 2009 22:16

I hope Bob went to the doctor and I hope he is ok.
YOO HOO Bob, are you there?

Huia.