General Chat

very true Kim, excuses, excuses but in the end, we realise what BS they all are!!.

My ex is on his 4th wife now, all 3 before ended cos of his violent ways........I feel sorry for his now wife cos I know she must be going through the same that I did...., He will NEVER change...

kitty

its better for a child to have

one good parent

than two at war hun xxx

yep, will do Whirley,

Taff, they can read this thread tho..

Taff, you could put a thread up saying there is a domestic violence thread up over on chat?....

Hi joy XXX Trouble is that is so much easier said than done ...the first time it,s I,m sorry it will never happen again ... the second time .. I,m sorry but if you hadn,t ... the third time ... I,m under pressure and your not supporting me ... the 4th add infinitum..
Leaving sounds easy ..it,s not .
If you call the police , you have to say you fear for your life or it,s called a domestic ...and they will pop round eventually ..in the meantime ???
Please believe me .. there comes a time when there is no option ... you get out , once away you get the , but I love you ... lets try again ... then its .. the kids need a father ..your fault , they will try the same ol same ol ..cos it worked before .
Anyone in this position ..once you are away ...never ever go backwards ...
(((HUGS))) to you
XXX

that sounds daft, thinking about it, because the people that are going through it NOW, wont/cant add.

Yes first time everytime........the second time they do it just prooves that men or women that hit, sadly are like Leopards, they don't change their spots...

If my now OH ever hurt me (not that he would cos he is a decent, good man) but if he did, I would be off.....I was naive,brainwashed, some may say stupid first time around, but i would NEVER stay with a man who raised a hand to me again.

there is a thread on gen about depression/anxiety.
Should we start one for Domestic violence?

my Pleasure love,
xxxxxx

thanks for adding that number Taff........xx

No Joy< you should leave the 1st time, but thats being said in hindsight, as I am sure whirley would agree!!

very true Kim, I was always told it was my fault.

He shoved my head through a window once, he told me I made him do it and it was my fault. He told his brother, who turned up not long after it happend, that I had "fell against the window" I spent days picking bits of glass out of my head.........

Because they are brain washed

to think its their fault

and they don't deserve anything better

well you do deserve better

if your partner hits you once

get them help

if they hit you again leave

the number for womens AID is ,,08082000247,
if a free call and confidendial, for anyone out there that needs it, or just google "Womens Aid".
I hope this will help someone................

exactly kim !!!!

because when you are in that position you see all the other people who are happily married who,s husbands don,t use their fists and ask yourself why me ?.. Your partner will always tell you it,s your fault .. your stupid ... useless , a bad mother . If you weren,t they wouldn,t hit you , it,s your fault they loose their temper . ...
Each and every day it,s drummed into you ... you try harder , nothing changes .. but you keep thinking ,if only I,m like all the other women who don,t get hit .. it will change ... it,s my fault .
it,s called control ..
kim xxx

there was a girl who used to come into my shop with her baby....one day at closing time she started talking....showed me the bruises all over her arms and back......

"He only hits me when I've annoyed him, done something wrong,or he's had a drink...the rest of the time he loves me! and he wouldn't ever hit our son...unless..."

I got her a place at the womens refuge that night (I had links through work) the next day she was back with him.....
because 'he loved her'. Not what I call love... if someone hit me...they'd be out...whether I loved them or not!

Rose xx

nice one Colin...

I even came across it at Vodafone when women would ring and beg for us to change their mobile numbers because they had run away from the abuse and their partner was still piling on the mental torture '''I know where you are'' type of call. I always did without hesitation or charge and then I would often send a company text to tell the abuser their mobile usage was being monitored and if they continued to send abusive, offensive or threatening text messages / calls they would be barred from the network...used to hope that it was a bit of support for the abused