Genealogy Chat

dear julia what a lovely story,pulled a few heart strings when reading it good luck with the future i know just how you feel and how you felt about scared of been rejected its so lovely when everything works out god bless angie

special prayers been said for the lady recieving chemo i to have birth parents who dont want nothing to do with me but believe me the feeling is mutual even though it still hurts to know they still feel the same as they did 39yrs ago lots of love angie x

thanks for your kind words Angie and Julia. Jules xx

Hi im sending loving vibes to lady having chemo treatment, all are hearts are with you God bless Julia x

has any one got ant tips on tracing birth grandparents my mother was born before my nan married my grandad so realy he is my step grandad my mother took on his name after they married so dont know what her real name was at birth my grandparents married 4yrs after my mother was born so it would of been 1950 and in the ladywood area of b,ham my grandad was called tom or thomas jones and my nan was francis but dont know maiden name very complicated family to say the least any tips would be helpfull best wishes angie

angela- does her birth cert have a fathers name on it_ that would be your next step Jess

havnt got her birth cert she was born in b,ham how do i apply for her cert angie

Hi everyone, I have just spoken to lady at the Childrens society where my adoption file is held and it should be being sent out tomorrow recorded delivery to my social worker. thats my second bit of good news this week,not bad going I don't think. I am starting to get a little excited now as it feels like I am getting somewhere from sue

Christina, if they are on this site then they are looking for relatives like the rest of us, (good or bad news) i think you should go ahead and make contact and Good Luck,MOE!

Christina- tread carefully and with tact and caution. My father had 4 batches of children with 4 different women. He just kept moving on! The oldest son is dead - but HIS son is receptive.The 2nd born doesn't want to know, The 3rd born - have spoken to his wife (and his mother) but not him, and the eldest of the fourth batch of children knows of us and is okay, but doesn't want the others to know(MORE) The 3rd batch was a full sister , who like me was given for adoption.We have traced and are the very best of friends. So really it can go all ways or any ways- I would suggest contacting the eldest initially if you can and just gauge the reaction best of luck, let us know what the outcome is, wont you? jess

Christina, There are no hard and fast rules about contact. I have 2 half sisters one i have a good relationship with, the other I haven't made contact with. I also have a half brother who I have a good relationship with. Both my birth have died, Mum when I was 8 and dad 14 years ago. I did find Grandad (Dad's dad) thru his school's web site purly by chance. I emailed saying that I was looking for information on (name) born (when) from (area) and that I was wondering if they could be related. I didn't state why I wanted to know or who I was. Just my new name (adoptive). Grandad emailed back saying he was his father and to ring him with pleasure as there was much to say about him. Needless to say I rang the following day and all went swimmingly. Moral of the story. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Just send an email and be a little vague about who you are. Just ask if they are related to such a person etc and send it. Wishing you all the best. Jules xx

Unashamedly whacked back to the front!! Jess xx

How did the file opening session go on the 24th Lorraine?

hi Lorraine, how did viewing your file go on the 24th?.I will hopefully get to see mine very soon. From Sue

Hi Jess, Jules, Lorraine and everyone, Back on thread one, which seems ages ago, I said I was looking for my Polish B/M. A new development has been that the kind Polish man in the Isle of Wight, who has been helping me, phoned. He has been in contact with a Polish lady who knew my B/M Krystyna during WW2 in a Signals regiment. This lady, Irena, has given him the phone number of another Polish lady, living in Spain, who also knew my mother. This lady in Spain wants me to phone her, too late last night, so will try early this evening as taking adoptive mother out for her birthday today (Sunday). What is so exciting is that the lady in Spain knew my B/M had had a baby and also that B/M emigrated to Canada after I was born. So the moral is .. NEVER GIVE UP, I have been searching for two years, needle in a haystack at times, but somehow every time I wonder if I will ever find Krystyna, a tiny bit of info turns up. I will let you know what happens. Love to everyone, thinking of those who are finding parents and family. Sue X

Hi Sue I shall hold my breath and keep everything possible crossed for you that this is the breakthrough that you need Lou xxx

Morning Lou, Thanks for your good wishes. The phone call was interesting. Apparently my b/m gave up nursing, as not well paid (ha ha) and worked in a bar to save for her fare to Canada. Toronto or Montreal, she is not sure. She was going there to join her sister!! I did not know she had any other relatives, thought she was an 'only' like me. So now I shall be searching for two rellies, not just one and there may be cousins too. Sadly this lady had no photos, but gave me a good description of b/m. This lady saw my mother on a regular basis, after she had given me up, she said b/m used to cry about this, but there was no way she could keep me due to financial reasons. No mention of b/f and she never asked. She really wants to help me and is writing to her friend in Canada. She had lost touch a long time ago, but is very keen to help me find b/m. Sue

Hi, Had a phone call today from my social worker,she has my adoption file and I have made an appointment to see her next Monday(6th) at 11am. Can't wait Sue

Hi Sues! Good news for both of you, keep us posted on developments. I had another very long phone call with BM over the weekend and we're going to try and arrange to meet up again sometime soon. My eldest son (who's almost 17) wants to meet her and she's keen to see him so we'll try and get something planned. I'm not sure about the little ones at the moment, they're too young to understand what's going on but would hate to confuse my 3 year old and I don't want to have to lie to her about who BM is if she asks. A tricky one! Finally got a letter from younger half brother on Saturday which was good - was beginning to think he wasn't that bothered after all. He apologised for taking so long to write but admitted that he was embarassed about his current situation (he's in prison!) and was worried that I wouldn't want to know him or let him have anything to do with my children because of where he is. I haven't replied yet but I will do sometime this week. Lou

good luck to the two sues lots of changes happening in your lives i had my adoption file about 2yrs ago after waiting about 10 weeks which seemed an eternity my file was well documented lots of info on my birth parents and what happened to me after i was taken away lots of social workers reports and medical info in my file also my school reports were in there actually it was like reading about some one elses life and not mine very wiered feeling but im glad iv got them to keep lots of info i didnt know about i think i read my file every day for the first year i had it now i just get it out now and again cus some of it is a bit destressing but iv learnt to cope with what happened to me and very greatfull i had wonderfull foster parents who picked up the pieces good luck every 1 love angie