Genealogy Chat

I had another trip to my local records office today and found another two youngsters who died very early,the same family as the two i mentioned at the start of the thread. So now i have 5 graves in the next town (4 for children under 8 months plus the mother) and 3 in Lincoln for children under one year old,makes you realise just how lucky we are in this day and age,at least most children (though not all i know) do survive. Glen

i always straighten flowers,tidy up a bit etc whenever i visit any graveyard.As a family we often roam,reading and talking about the graves wherever we visit.Its how my children learn to read and write,tracing letters. They find wild flowers and place them on uncared for graves.. My sister is in a graveyard far away and i'd be delighted whoever placed flowers there.luckily my parents can. if anyone has any in the bangor/bethesda area i'm happy to help.

Hi Merry, I have rellies buried in East Cemetary Bournemouth and hope to go and find them some day soon,is the cemetary huge? would it be difficult to just go and hope I would find where my Grandma and her Sister are buried ? I have been told its a double grave. You might remember me you were very helpful recently on a death and electoral roll lookup in Bournemouth on my behalf. Ellen

maybe we could all adopt a relatives grave!! or if w can't find a rellie just a well forgotten one--you never know it might start a trend and our ancestors might get better cared for !!

Oh Brian that's a good idea! I'll go up tomorow and check all the details for you. I've been meaning to copy them down and to see if there's anyone on the site related to them. Thank you, Helenx

Georgette. If you give me the date and one of the names I may be able to look up the details if they were in Bomber command.

In the cemetery here in my village, I live in France, there are four well tended British and Commonwealth war graves. An allied plane was shot down here near the end of the war and all the crew were killed. On Rememberance Day I took some poppies that my Mother had sent me up to the graves. I felt a bit daft but I was glad that I did it. One grave had flowers but the others were bare and on reading the inscriptions I realised that two of the men were Australian and so unlikely to be visited often. Helenx

Well Phoenix, as you know I lost my darling dad in October a day after his 91st birthday and I miss him so very much. He doesnt have a grave or a stone but I did what he wanted (totally illegally - but sue me!). Half his ashes are in the Thames at Surrey Docks and the other half in Paddock Wood by a row of hops.

Hi, All, I was walking to my Grandson's school with my Daughter and on the way we used a path that cuts through Giants Grave cemetery in Briton Ferry, Neath. I was very sad to see the years of neglect. It was overgrown and some of the headstones were only barely visible amongst the tangle of vegetation. It is such a shame to see, it would be great to see some sort of restoration project. Donna.

Back in 1974, when we buried my beloved Grandma, there were two graves dug in readiness. One was my Gran's. Right next to it was another, but it was boarded over and we were asked to try and avoid it. A week later, I returned to Gran's grave and as expected, the other grave had been used, but there were no flowers or anything. Over the years, of going to the church yard at least once a month, the other grave has NEVER had flowers or a Headstone. As a child I never really thought about it, but being older and more curious now, I wonder who's grave it is. As we lived in a tiny village, everyone knew everyone, but obviously, because of our own grief at the time, we wouldn't have heard about the other death in the village. (Well I didn't - I was only 11). Now I realise that the other grave does belong to someone I would have known, and most likely the very old farmer who lived opposite us ... with only 7 cows that he brought in from the field every night and every morning. I have searched for another grave location for him, but to no avail. For the last 3 years I have taken an extra bunch of flowers and placed them in a pot on the grave, on the anniversary of my Gran's death, as this is when I presume he would have died. I don't know if what I do is the right or wrong thing to do, but no one else seemed to be around to care .. so why shouldn't I. Elaine ;-)

My daughter is buried in a special section for still born and neo natal deaths. A lot of the graves are neglected and it makes me very sad. Before I had my youngest I used to go once a week tiday round and even sweep the paths! I don't get time to do that anymore, but when I go I still have a tidy round and put back stuff that has been blown over or removed by nasty vermin that think it's funny to steal stuff off babies graves. I hate to see graves neglected, I have also been and put pots for my ancestors that have to head stone, I need them to know they are not forgotten Linda

People are so lucky finding graves of rellies - most of mine were coal miners so no graves there. I do know where some of them a burried in Abney Park Cemetery in London (these weren't coalminers) but I don't know if there is a grave stone. The Cemetery has now been turned into a park and a lot of it is overgrown. I am tempted to write to the trust and pay £8.00. For this they search for the buriel and then send you a plan of the cemetery with the grave plots and numbers on. The only problem is that it is £8.00 per buriel, and I have about 10 rellies in there!

In one of the cemertries near home I see alot of unattended grave stone - some modern and condemed - and it pains me to think no-one cares! on top of that there are alot of graves there belonging to my family - heaven know how I'll sort them all out! I take flowers when I visit for friends and family but I'll have to take some secators and get rid of the weed from the family graves at the very least and may be soe seeds to grow too. (I promise to be careful and only prune back the overgrowth from the edges - if it's attached to the stone, it will stay in place!)

Before you all set about tidying up churchyards, please check that you are allowed to do so and please think twice about pulling ivy from a stone. In my innocence, I performed that service for one of my ancestors.... and a large piece of inscription fell from the stone. Now I can't read the stone and nor can anyone else. As for mourning our relatives, we do this in very different ways. My father's ashes are buried in a cemetery he never visited, whose existence he was probably unaware of. Putting flowers on that grave pays lip-service to his memory, but is not the method I would choose. When I go, I don't want a stone, but a large asparagus bed planted in my memory. Lots of hard work for the mourners, but a good supper afterwards!

One of the graves I visited in Ashwell a couple of weeks ago was overgrown with ivy, another had quite a bit round the headstine but I managed to pull that off. It's about 50 miles from home but I must go back with some secateurs and weedkiller ASAP.

Ill do the same if you have Wymondham Norfolk rellies.

So....does any GR member have a rellie in Boscome East Cemetery, Bournemouth or Christchurch Priory graveyard?? If they do, then I would be willing to go and see it and take a photo and give it a hug for them! Then maybe the odd bunch of daffs etc...... Merry

Hi, i think its a good idea about adopting a grave some members on here may not be able to get to their rellies grave as they live to far away, hubbys 3x grt grandad is buried in the cemetary at llanbeblig carnarvon, we would only be able to visit once maybe twice a year. I took a pic of my nans grave and showed my mum to make sure it was the right one, and she couldnt believe how bad it looked, she hasnt been for 15-20 yrs dont know why so didnt press her but i dont mind tending it

I recently found my gt grandfathers grave... only 20 minutes drive away!! Dont expect anyone had been there in years, hubby and I found a lot of the lead letters that had come out of the stone and put them back.... I will be visiting him again to make sure that the gravestone is kept in good condition.

I have a photo of the graves of my 2xg-grandparents which was taken in 1905. I was shocked when we visited the churchyard last summer and the part they are in was completely overgrown with brambles and the stones are all lopsided - in the photo it's like a bowling green lawn! Spoke to the verger later.....he at least looked a bit sheepish! All the rest of the graveyard is still in nice nick. I wondered if they had done their home work and discovered the fact that my 2xg-granddad was very anti the C of E????? Merry