Genealogy Chat

To Everyone Who as replied to Jennifer: Jennifer as asked me to Thank You All for your lovely messages of comfort. Jennifer is unable to answer you due to the loss of her membership and family tree. Jennifer is devastated as she had over a years work on her tree and for some reason she has lost her membership? Do not understand why or how, but it all just disappeared and Jennifer can no longer access Genes Reunited? So Thank You Everyone from Jennifer. Friend Janice x

oh my poor darling you must be so angry and frustrated. take care of yourself love and big hug to you love linda x x

Oh Jennifer, that is terrible,more than that, it's despicable. There are some mindless/heartless people around.They will get their comeuppence eventually, one day their conscience will bother them, + they will have to live with the knowledge of the dreadful thing they have done. I know we should try to understand why they do these things but it is very difficult....Sometimes I think we are just too soft on these vandals. I wish you well in leaving a note for the return of the items. It may well prick the conscience of somebody. I hope it's a small comfort to you to know that there are a lot of people on here who are thinking about you + wishing you well. Take care Regards Ann x

There really are some nasty people around. There has been a spate of this in Gloucester, anything that will sell at a car boot sale was taken, little cherubs, angels etc. And they never seem to catch them. Instead of putting more there for them to take why not have a nice photo of him framed and arrange some little ornaments in front of it especially for him. he will know you have done this and they will be safe in your home. Ann Glos

It is good to hear that there are still people out there that teach their children respect.

A few weeks ago my son took his little boy (only 4) to visit my Mum's grave, - she died earlier this year. My grandson accidently walked across another grassed over grave. Jon very gently told his son off, explaining that it was unacceptable to tread on someone's else resting place. I am so sorry that the thoughtless action of some people, who don't know how to behave, has caused you further pain. But, as you say, your son knows you put them there for him. Take care of yourself Jennifer. Christine

Thanks Anne will try that on Sunday while I am down.

Jennifer, this may sound daft but I am serious. Tell my grandma what happened - she and I are beholden to you and your son now - and if she can she will protect him. Anne

I cannot imagine the cemetary removing them without informing us, as we planted a little tree on Gran's grave, just for her first Christmas and they attached a little note saying you must remove this or we will have to. It was removed by my Son after Christmas and is now growing well in my back garden. But two of my children put creme eggs on Stephen's grave, it made them feel as if they were not leaving him out at Easter, for all he was 34, and they were there for a few weeks and I could not decide if I should remove them or not,but we found the empty wrappers by the grave so somebody ate them, had been on the grave for a while so dread to think what they tasted like. But that did not bother me as much.

I'm so sorry Jennifer. People can be so cruel. Helenxx

Oh sweetie that is so so sad!! xx

You poor thing. I once had a miscarriage and thought that the world had ended and didn't know how I would ever cope. I've since had 2 beautiful boys and realised how much worse life could be. I know that I don't know the extent of your pain but you have my utmost sympathy. I believe that your son is in a wonderful place and will know just how much effort you have gone to for him even though some horrid person/s have removed your efforts. Hopefully one day they will realise the magnitude of what they have done. Toni

I have a friend who lost a child at birth, and for all I helped her and said I understood what she was going through, I did not have a clue, I only now can appreciate the raw pain she must have experienced. People are so cruel and do not realise the added grief and pain they put on other's. I just hope some day they wake up and realise what they do is wrong and soul destroying.

Hi Jennifer, As if you have not been hurt enough, mindless, unfeeling idiots heap more grief upon you. My best friend was taken into hopital two weeks ago with a perforated bowel, when his 12 year old daughter went to school she was met with a barrage of.....'Hear your dads ill in hospital, hope he dies'....and do you know what, he did last Sunday. If only children could understand the pain that child is now going through, my heart is bleeding for her. Kathlyn

I may put a little note by my Son's grave, asking them to return them-you never know, they may have a guilt trip and replace them where they belong.

Oh Jennifer, thats awful. But you can only feel sorry for the sort of people who do these things - they must have so little love in their lives its their way of kicking back. They will not be happy people all their lives.

Sorry to hear that, there just seems to an increasing lack of respect for other people's right and property. The old saying 'The Devil makes work for idle hands' comes to mind.

What a horrible thing to do, Jennifer. If only the people who do these mindless things knew how upsetting it is, perhaps they would think again.

Thank you Sarah-Jennifer.

Oh Jennifer, how awful! It's probably just kids that have no idea what it is to lose someone. Unfortunately it's a sign of the times we live in - and a lack of respect. Your son knows that you are thinking of him, and although the pots are no longer there, your feelings (as signified by them) still are! I wish you all the courage & faith you need during your period of grief. You don't 'get over it' - but you can believe that, with time, you do learn to live with it. Sarah (another who has lost a son)