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Hello,

I am looking for my mother Nicola Ann Sutherland who was born in Gillingham Kent around 1953. She has another son (my half brother) called Lawrence, I last saw her and Lawrence in Whickham (a suburb of Gateshead) in 1990, but she moved to Leeds shortly afterwards.

I have searched the records here and only turned up the marriage record to my father, and Facebook turned up nothing useful; of course this could simply be because she is no longer using the surname Sutherland due to marriage.

If anyone has any useful information I would be very grateful. Many thanks in advance.

I see that your father re-married - so presumably, there was a divorce

Have you looked for a re-marriage for your mother?

https://www.freebmd.org.uk/cgi/search.pl

I see you have your mother in your GR tree - you aren't actually supposed to include living people unless you have their permission

You give info about her birth - but is there isn't a record on freebmd to back that up

Do you know what surname Lawrence was using in 1990?

If anyone was trying to locate you, the fact that you've changed the spelling of your first name might cause them a problem

You might consider putting your registered first name in your tree on here - just in case someone starts looking for you

Ah ok, I didn't realise so have deleted that. I thought it maybe helpful if she was on here searching for me.

She was born in Gillingham Kent (it's on my birth certificate copy) and according to my father she was 18 at the time of my birth in Sept 71 so would have been born in 1953. She was also adopted by a Welsh lady called Gaynor, so perhaps that's why there is no record on freebmd?

Yes there was a divorce, and that would have been prior to 1976 when my father remarried. I have no idea what name Lawrence was using at the time, it would make things a bit easier as it would have already given me another lead.

As she was adopted, there is no way of knowing what her birth name was

When she married, she would have used her adoptive surname.

I'm guessing you don't know what name your mother was using in 1990.

I do know the reasons for the adoption but obviously don't want to splash that all over a public page, so I'm trying the give as much information as I can without revealing anything sensitive. Sorry no I don't know what name she was using back in 1990, and it's quite possible that even though she wasn't married at the time, she still wasn't using Sutherland as she may have kept Lawrence's surname to make things easier for him.

If she is using another surname it's also possible that she's deceased which explains why no such records have revealed themselves to me. Sadly this all makes things rather awkward doesn't it?!

So pleased that you are being discreet - you'd be surprised how many people don't think that way!

I don't think I'd be too happy with people dredging up a dim and distant past on a public forum for the world to see, so I'm being very mindful of this; not least because it could also be detrimental to any future relationship if it were to develop.

Sending you a message Justyn, a possible marriage ? Just to look further at.

Do you know when Lawrence was born?

EDIT: Never mind. Found his birth and surname was then changed to Williams it looks like.

Rose

Rose that would tie in with what I am looking at I think.

there is another birth for same names ,same area in 1980- this is an odd one

Same birth.

Looks like the 1979 registration documentation gave the child Nicola's surname at the time, but also mentioned the real father's surname, so in 1979 the Index lists him twice, once under each name.

Then there's an amended registration in 1980, giving him the surname Williams only.

That one does seem odd, as both names are known to me so do tally with my half brother. What isn't known is the circumstances, but again that's best kept off this page. ;-)

So what name was she using the last time you had contact

She had remarried in 1976

Justyn stated earlier in the thread that he doesn't know what name she was using in 1990

for ref helpers, I have exchanged messages with Justyn, and am still looking for any follow up after marriage to Williams, there are several marriages that could be his after that date, which would seem to support what Justyn knows about her having moved away.