Find Living Relatives

Please can anyone help with trying to find my husbands birth mother, he was born in 1972 We really dont know what is the next step is, so if anyone has any advise or information this would be much appreciated.

Many Thanks

This is copied from the guidance posted by GR

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If you were adopted and want to know who your original parents were, contact the adoption authority of your local Social Services. They will arrange for appropriate counselling and you will be shown your original birth certificate, and your adoption papers, which should explain why you were adopted, and perhaps give some helpful details to help you trace your natural parents. There are also two other websites which can help to bring families looking for each other together - http://www.norcap.org.uk/ and http://www.postadoptioncentre.org.uk/Services/adviceline.php.

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So presumably your OH has already applied for and received his adoption file.

You would need to check BMD (or ask) to find out if his mother has married/changed her name, and (possibly) if she is now deceased.

192.com is a good source for ER from about 2002 to the current year, remembering that it is now possible to withhold your name from on-line ER sites.

Make sure that his birth name and that of his mother's is on your tree on this site.

You could find her birth reg on freebmd and see if she had any siblings and try and contact them in a similar way.

It is strongly advised that you do not approach her directly if you do find her. Her current family may not know of your OH, and she may not want any contact. Even though you may have to pay, use an 'official' 3rd party negotiator.

Thank you very much for all the helpful information and the links, we will start looking into this and luckily we had already thought that maybe her family were unaware of the adoption and needed to be very sensitive to this. But thank you again for taking the time to repond to our post.

Do you have your file or know her name?

Dont post it here, keep the sensitivity you have about it - it will get you much further.

How much do you know about her now? a lot? not a lot? Zilch?
Do you know what sort of age she was? it would help to know. very young suggests one senario, an 'older' mum that perhaps had an affair within a marraige suggests possible others. The detail is what will help us look in the right places to follow it on....hopefully.

You file will ( hopefully) contain some/many/absolutely none of the answers, so get on and apply to see it, if you haven't already.

By the way, it is the adoptee ( and the adoptee only) that can apply for their files. They dont let Partners /wives/children request them, however well intentioned. They do like it straight from the horses mouth.It has to be '' I want to access MY adoption file''

Do NOT put the mother's details on this site - putting living people in a GR should ONLY be done if you have the person's permission. Putting her details in your tree would be a total violation of her right to privacy

Has your husband put himself on the national adoption contact register?

Reggie - while agreeing that a living person's name should not be posted on an open board unless there is a desparate need to contact them, and that in the usual course of events they shouldn't be on a tree without permission, adoption is a special case.

it could be that the mother is also trying to find her adopted child, and would also have that child's birth name and her own on her tree, or one of her other children (If there are any) has added the birth mother's name to their tree.

;-)