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Perkins Brother and Sister Dont know i exist

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Warren

Warren Report 2 Apr 2012 19:42

Hi
My name is now warren oconnell my name was changed by my mother by deed poll, but it was Perkins, i have been told by my father when we met very briefly that i had a brother and sister but they did not know about me, My father is David John Perkins who lives now with his sister Carol near pontesbury shropshire. i am now 50 years 1962 and i know i was older because he was with my mother first he also told me that one of them or maybe both moved to america. My father left when i was two and i only met him for an hour as i found him on the internet and just turned up at his door but that was 5 yrs ago and he will not talk again, very strange, i would love to know more of my brother and sister and i bet they would be surprised at having a brother, any help would really help

Warren

jax

jax Report 2 Apr 2012 20:19

Welcome to the boards Warren

Do you know if your father married their mother? Do you know if your father is in touch with them?

Have you tried the search trees to see if anyone has your father in their tree?

If you do not know their names or who their mother was it could be an impossible task to find them

Click ADD REPLY button - not this link!

Click ADD REPLY button - not this link! Report 2 Apr 2012 20:34

When was your father born? Have you tried Search trees at the top?

Rose

Paul

Paul Report 3 Apr 2012 14:53

PM sent

jax

jax Report 3 Apr 2012 15:26

Of what Paul? was it the marriage in 1971? or the fathers address?

Did you also ask Warren to return to this thread?

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 15:35

is this the correct place to answer everyones questions or direct reply to message from inbox?

Jonesey

Jonesey Report 3 Apr 2012 15:39

Warren,

Always best to answer on the thread. That way anyone who is following the thread is kept up to date.

The exception being if your answer is likely to contain sensitive information E.G Personal details about someone who may still be alive.

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 15:53

I dont have lots of information as i said i have only ever spoke to my father for an hour just the once, he wont talk any more, my mother just wont talk about her past life, she says very little i think embarresed about it, and i find it hard to put more presure to ask. I sure he said that they moved to america or was that so i would not look for them as it would stir up problems for him as they dont know about me. is there a way to look at records abroad?

Click ADD REPLY button - not this link!

Click ADD REPLY button - not this link! Report 3 Apr 2012 16:00

If you tracked him down on the internet you must know more as there are many David J Perkins. Did he marry?

Rose

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 16:09

hi rose yes i did use internet but cant remeber how i did this i know he lives ross on wye croft cottages

Jonesey

Jonesey Report 3 Apr 2012 16:30

Warren,

Regarding the availability of overseas records, even if available without knowing for certain the details of your possible half siblings where and what for would you look?

Whilst I can appreciate your feelings and frustrations about wishing to find out about your possible half siblings you also have to be aware of the feelings of others.

Maybe your half siblings were never told of their fathers past life and for whatever reason your father prefers things to remain that way. That could well explain why apart from your brief conversation with him 5 years ago he no longer wishes to discuss things further with you. If he did say that his children from another relationship/marriage were now abroad then whilst that might be true it might just as easily simply have been a way to try to discourage you from trying to trace and speak to them.

The key is obviously your father. If he is unwilling to explain to you why he does not wish you to have contact with your half siblings then your chances of locating them yourself are not very good. Perhaps a letter to your father expressing exactly why you would like to contact them or alternatively be contacted by them might be a way forward.

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 16:44

Hi Jonesey You say about feelings of others, i have thought about this for so long, my father leaves my family knows of me the whole time and never makes any contact with me he then goes on to start a new family just leaving everything in his past behind just in case it messes up his new life, how can i have any problems worring about his feelings, does he deserve any respect from me, i have tried talking to him on the phone and also mailing him he lives with his sister who seems to protect him, when ever i call he is not in and never calls me. sorry if i sound angry im not just looking to know half brother and sister

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 19:32

I would like to say thank you for all the help i have had on here, i have now found my fathers ex wife and been talking to her on the phone and she is going to pass my details on to her son and daughter, she did know about me but did not know how to contact me with my name being changed by deed poll when i was very young and the fact that she does not even own a televsion i dont think tech was going to help, im so happy and thank you all that has helped, thank you only took 50yrs lol

Penny

Penny Report 3 Apr 2012 20:24

Hope its fruitful Warren, take it slowly, dont put pressure on anyone to be anything they find hard to deal with.

Warren

Warren Report 3 Apr 2012 23:23

If you can beleive in faith playing its part in life then this is a day it has worked for me.