Find Living Relatives

I am glad that GR have reinstated my request for help .

any help to find Steven Lloyd would be much appreciated.

Do you know one of your posts has disappeared Flick?

My point precisely, RR...........I think you failed to grasp it

But as I've said 'Black American' is widely used...on sites dedicated to and run by 'Black Americans' ...who also of course use 'African American' as a description.

The ONLY 'PC' way of putting it would be ( re this person) " of Ethnic Carribean origin'.

But isn't that a bit like me saying I am of 'ethnic british origin' ...and that isn't in the least 'correct' as a description of me...' English, Irish, a bit of Scottish and Canadian...and if you go back a bit maybe French or Italian'...

It's really much quicker and more accurate to say "white'...or 'caucasian'?

Black is a description, as is white, mulatto, caucasian etc :)
I fail to understand how any of those could be considered to be offensive.

I can't remember the exact wording Ice I B, but it didn't seem to me to be phrased offensively just a statement of fact i thought.

Down to GR to decide :-)

Flick, i guess my rationale on that would be that the "illegitimate living person" might not know they were illegitimate, and perhaps born at a time when there was still a stigma attached to it, and so better not to post it publicly...

Whereas in this case the missing person and anyone who knew them would 'know' they were black ( or variation of that colour, eg I am called 'white', but that too is inaccurate as I'm really sort of 'pale worm colour' lol)

It's strange - indeed, amazing - how opinions vary.......

There was a request on here recently asking for help in finding an 'illegitimate' living person, and the poster refused to remove the word............and used as a reason the fact that calling someone illegitimate wasn't an insult, whereas if the request had said the person may be black, it would be an insult.

I think personally that it is acceptable to mention someone's colour, just as it is to say they speak with an Irish accent, have red hair, or a wart on the nose. mentioning someone's colour in this context is an additional 'identifier'... if my son was lost I would obviously say I was looking for a 'white' lad with brown hair...same thing. To ask for it to be removed is to make an issue of his colour, where one does not exist. (imo).

No it doesn't have any bearing on data that can be found...but if someone was looking in who knew him, or the person himself , it might well be relevant.

It has been an emotional journey. I cant say roller coaster as there have not been any ups. I just want to find someone even if its not Steven but maybe a cousin or uncle just so that I have some family and maybe they might be able to tell me something about him.

Thank you for the kind words

I know it's tempting to rush in, but long term you will have a better chance of a good relationship if you go slowly and give everyone a chance to get used to the situation. :-)

Thanks for the advice. I tend to be a bit hot headed! I actually found him in a family tree and so I have sent an email to the owner asking if these details sound familiar.

oh Catherine please DON'T do that, it isn't fair to turn up on someone's doorstep or phone.... a, it might not be him and b, you're not giving him any chance to consider how to react if it is him!

More likely to get a positive reaction by giving him time to think about it, he might not know you exist....imagine a stranger turning up claiming to be related ( and if it is him he'll need time to talk to Stephen!)

Write a letter asking if he is the Errol Lloyd who had a brother Stehen living in Peckham, give your name and say you think there may be a family connection, could he get in touch...add a stamped envelope with your address on it.

I have found the Errol LLoyd on 192 but I have no phone number only an address. I went to his house yesterday but he was not in!

192.com has an Errol Lloyd. in NW 10 of a likely age ( 2002/7), you will need to buy credits for the address, on the chance that it might be him, and might be still there.

Do you have an address for him? (Don't put it here obviously!). If so you can check for it on Friends Reunited. The same goes if you have a school or workplace.
Jan

I am trying to find Steven Lloyd. I think he was born in 1948 so he would be about 63 now but this is a guess. He lived in Peckham/Brockley in 1975. He had an older brother called Errol. He was black and I have been told that he may have been from St Lucia.
If you recognise any of these details please contact me.

Thanks