General Chat

Hello all,

Thanks Ann, but I didn’t drive all the way there and back, we took it in turns.Can’t say I actually liked having to drive so fast all the way back though, even when I was hitting 150 kms. per hour, cars were whizzing past, many hugging our bumper before doing so. Why DO people do this? I wasn’t nervous at all, it made me feel angry.

Liz, it is me who should say ‘mea culpa’ for misunderstanding you. Only dawned on me today that s.i.l could mean son or daughter-in-law…..Will put it down to the high temp. I was running, couldn’t think straight. Have always boasted that I never catch colds or flu since ’83, when one lung was removed (cancer), when people are dropping around me. Now it seems I have picked up some bug or other, which causes the high temp. sore throat, pain in head, but this will pass soon, am sure of that.In all the years I kept getting bronchitis & pneumonia, before the cancer was at last discovered, I never stayed in bed for long, couldn’t afford to with 5 children to look after, so assume this will not hang around for long either.

Another lovely day, would have done some work in the garden if well enough, what a shame.


Eileen

Sorry Eileen, I think I confused you, I meant that your daughter's hubby was home early so could look after your grandson, but maybe that is even more confusing......

Anyway, glad that your daughter and her friend are coming to terms with this man's passing. It's sometimes easy to think if only I had noticed, or done this or that, but I think that fate has a hand in things and hence we aren't 'allowed' to change things.

Que sara.....

Lizxx

Eileen, well done for driving all that way and coping well. What a great boost to your confidence.
I am glad you enjoyed the wedding but am sorry that your daughter had such bad news. well done her for not letting the news spoil the wedding.
It is good that your daughter has come to terms with it, also the poor fellow's partner.
Mary, how sad for Em to have to learn about death so early on in her life. Poor child, only 3 what a nasty disease cancer is. My thoughts go to the little ones family.

cI had just typed a long reply, when I clicked on a wrong key, message vanished.

Mary, Liz and Colin, thank you for your kind words.It is nice to that you support me.
Mary, the death of a child is too terrible to contemplate, the worst thing that can happen to parents.Poor wee mite.How does anyone get over such an awful thing.The parents, friends and your g.daughter Em. Must be devastated.Cancer is a b****r, life can be soooo cruel.
Liz.My s.i.l didn’t take care of the son of daughter F’s friend, but the mother, until F. collected him yesterday to stay at her place until the funeral on monday.My s.i.l died on the birthday of my youngest’s daughter, 23rd, was cremated 29th, we left the next morning.Sad though it was, it was at least a ‘natural’ death.
Colin, thank you for the “welcome back”.
My daughter F, phoned earlier, she just wanted to talk.She now has accepted the suicide, as does the partner, her friend, because there were a lot of things they weren’t aware of, only found out when his letter was discovered. He at least chose a ‘clean way’, not slashed his wrists and throat like my other daughter’s boss.Apparently, a person walking in the woods found him, not a policeman as was first thought.Poor man, he was in shock.
My second eldest g.daughter’s partner suffers from bad depression, it runs in the paternal side of his family.His father hung himself a couple of years ago, then one of his brothers dropped by a couple of days later, behaved normal, but walked inot a river and drowned himself.Their father also hung himself years ago, and now g.daughter’s partner recently found out his grandma killed herself too. G.daughter and all of us are very worried he may do the same.

On a lighter note, it is lovely and warm & sunny here, have two large washings hanging outside.

Once again, I have to say cherish all those you love, you never know what is going to happen tomorrow, life goes by in a blink of the eye.

Eileen

Welcome back Eileen. Sorry to hear about your daughter's shocking news.
I have been thinking about the problem of suicide recently. The problem of youth suicide is getting quite a lot of attantion in this country at the moment.
I have known 3 or 4 people attempt it, including a close relative who died by suicide.
That is why I posted an email link a page or so ago to an article in the Sydney Morning Herald. As I said at the time, the man was a very prominent politician in this state. He survived by sheer chance, I think but the support he has had since has been enormously helpful. to him.
Sharron, of course you can say bah humbug to Easter. I appreciate the four days off, because we get Good Friday and the Monday is also a public holiday.
Mary, so sad for Em, perhaps you can tell her how much we gives hugs and support to each other here.
Hello Lily, I have seen you here before but I don't think we have said hello to each other.
Hugs and where appropriate xx to all. Colin.

Eileen, well done to you for coping so well with the driving and also to your daughter for holding herself together at such sad news. My deepest sympathy for her friend and all this poor chap's family and friends and of course your daughter and her son.
I am glad you got home safely, also glad your s.i.l. was available for his son when he needed him. May the poor man rest in peace, free now of his demons.

I am pleased you had such a lovely time and that the wedding went so well, a shame that it was marred by sad news for your daughter but very glad you felt the effort and stress of the journey was worthwhile and has built up your confidence too.

Take things easy if you can after so much driving and travelling, I am sure your unpacking will get done in time and you will catch up with yourself soon.


Mary, poor Em is learning some sad lessons in life, but with such a strong loving family around her as you all are, she will be ok I'm sure.

Hope everyone will have some better times ahead, so much sadness lately for so many people.

love
Lizxxx

Dear Eileen, we share your grief and that of your daughter. You are SO right that life is too short, one never knows what the next day may bring. My 9 y/o granddaughter learned this last week when her best friend's 3 y/o cousin died of cancer. Short time from diagnosis to death, very sad, and upsetting for the child, who slept here for 2 nights to be with our Em, her friend.
Please let your daughter know that caring thoughts are with her from across the world, and hugs for you,
love, Mqry

Hello all,

Am still a bit dazed from the long trip back from Brittany yesterday. The typical Breton wedding of my g.daughter was lovely, spectacular…but, it was marred for my daughter F.by a phone call from her husband on the wedding morning, to say the hussband of her best friend had committed suicide.Hubby was phoned by the police at 22.00 friday evening, to say he had to collect his son, who was staying over that night with his friend, because F’s hubby was at a Russian party…normally he would be out until the small hours, but had just got in when the police phoned.He had had a strange feeling all evening, that’s why he left so early.I had to really admire my daughter F. for the way she handled herself, even though her heart was breaking, she was wonderful on the special day, didn’t want to spoil it for anyone.We left Brittany yesterday around 11 am, stopped to get some shopping etc.(supermarkets are open until noon Easter)and got back here around 1.30 this morning.We took turns driving, as 1,100 kms. Is a long way to drive in one day.Had to drive very fast, i.e between 120-150 kms per hour, something I haven’t done in a long time, wasn’t in the least nervous, which has boosted my self confidence a lot.F. left at 9 am this morning to be with her friend, help arrange things for the funeral this friday.Such a terrible thing to happen, words fail me.Since the boss of my other daughter committed suicide, then the (natural) death of a s.i.l, I had been waiting for ‘the other shoe to fall’, as it were, being superstitious-wish I wasn’t.
Am happy that we were able to be there for the wedding and see all the g.children, g.g. children, and daugher A.aslo the husbands/partners and all the French friends and family of new hubby of g.daughter M.

Have to unpack still, didn’t have the heart to do anything up until now…..

Take care and cherish all those you love, life is soooo short.

Eileen

huh,it's a bruise,wouldn't you know it/

he is sleeping on the sofa at the moment because he bruised his ribs as well.there is a space of thirty odd square feet for me and the cat to sleep in.so the cat sleeps on my pillow

computer wont do capitals now.we do need a new one soon

Sharron how did the Oh get on at the hospital?

Picked our first pumpkin today and weighted it and it is 16 lbs. So will be eating lots of pumpkin this week, Plus going to make some pumpkin and bacon soup on Thursday, need to go shopping on Wednesday so can get everything I need then. As the weather is really cooling off now though a great time for soup. I usually freeze extra as well, plus a delivery to MIL as she loves home made soup of any kind. MiL has just had her 82 birthday and now recovering from a bout of bronchitis, so glad she is feeling better,

Had a fairly quite Easter, though we did have visitors stay over one night which was great. Easter bunny did not visit, but OH did get me a block of chocolate and a cream bun, We have not been away shopping for a while so difficult to get decent eggs.

Will be great to go shopping this week as need to stock up on a few items, so also need to think what I am going to need for the next couple of months as well. Lots of lists to write, We have to have the dishwasher fixed as is making funny noises, OH said he will take a trip back on Friday and hopefully it will be repaired by then, Lovely living in the country, but a problem when things break down,

Well off to have dinner and a lovely bath later.

Gail

Sharron, hope things are better today for you and your o.h. didn't do anything too nasty.

Had a quiet day on Sunday, I stayed in bed for ages as o.h. went with his son to see his father and I needed some rest, had been busy on Friday and Sat. with vaccing and shopping etc so as the weather wasn't great, stayed in bed and slept and watched tv till I wandered down for the evening. Had 4 different lots of chocs from o.h. for easter so lots to scoff, no cooking for the second evening - well just reheating, as we called at our favourite pizza place on Sat on way back from shopping, all pizzas were £4 each so two of those, two lots of fries and a large pack of salad filled us up on Sat and left enough for Sunday. How easy was that? I added extra sweetcorn and salad for Sunday and it was more than enough and two meals for £12.50 was a bargain. We don't often buy pizzas etc so was a treat and saved me some energy.
Hoping today will be brighter so we can go out somewhere in the afternoon, and then he will be at work Tues am and all back to normal.

Hope everyone is ok and had a nice Easter break

love
Lizxxx

Can you say "Bah,humbug" for Easter.
The old man has gone back to bed and OH is up at the hospital in A&E because his brain can't cope with his feet going fast and he fell over hurting his leg.
So I am stuck here with the cat,the computer and the bloody housework!
Bah Humbug anyway!

Hi Everyone,

A VERY HAPPY EASTER TO YOU ALL.

Lily.

Thank you Colin for the best wishes. Funny thing is I did not want to get married again, been there done that, was not important to me. However, it was to my OH, so I did go through with it on the condition he did not change once that ring was on my finger. He did change though, he was more content and loves me more each day, so I cannot deny him this. Best thing I ever did and have not regretted a day.

What a great article and well formed comments, not finished reading as yet. The trouble is it is such a taboo subject even today. If it was possible to talk about how you are feeling, without being labelled as attention seeking, I am sure there would not be so many suicides. Most people in hind site will say they spotted this sign or that, after the fact. What most people do not realise is that you get very good at hiding your feelings, the signs you see are that the person is just going through a bad patch and it will get better. Most close off close contact, do not want others getting close and do not talk about their problems, if asked it is "I am fine" "I am or will be okay". Sometimes there are no warning signs at all, again because it is so much easier to hide these feelings than to let anyone know that your mood is so so black. Families and close friends tend to blame themselves, this should never happen, it is not and never was their fault. We need to be able to discuss this subject more.

On a lighter note, also pleased with the end of daylight saving. When I was working I also hated those few weeks of getting up and going to work in the dark, too much wildlife still on the roads.

HAPPY EASTER TO EVERYONE.

love and hugs

Gail

Happy wedding anniversary Gail! (bit late but you know what I mean).

Our daylight saving ends this weekend. Hurrah. It's bad enough having to get up in the dark in the middle of winter, without having a couple of weeks in March as well.

On a much more serious note, our of our former prominent politicians wrote candidly in the Sydney Morning Herald about his near-fatal suicide attempt some years ago. His experience may help others. The link is:

http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/suicide-shouldnt-be-a-taboo-subject-20100331-reqr.html

I think anyone who tries to commit suicide is suffering from disordered thinking. It is not shame (this man was about to be dumped as opposition leader by another faction in his party). He just could not think straight. Fortunately (1) he was rescued by chance and (2) found real support among other people who knew what he was going through and (3) found the business community supportive enough to offer him a management position in the commercial world.

Lastly, it's Easter. Four days off work. Hurrah. Cue bunnies, bilbies (aussies will understand) and lots of chocolate. It is scientifically proven that chocolate is a mood lifter and that is not an April fool joke.

:-))) extra chin from all that chocolate, Colin

Claire, I am so sorry to read the news about your Mum, may she rest in peace now, free from all that has troubled her.

I hope you can recall happy times with your sister, as you think about your Mum

Lizx

I have put this on yhe thread about weather.It has been vile here all day,raining,blowing. Nobody went out who didn't have.Apart,of course from him in the wheelchair.He had to go out shopping.

I don't know if he is hard or silly!

Just looked in on facebook, and saw Claires mum died Sunday. Quite a shock
Left a message to say she knows where we all are if she needs to talk.

Hi Liz yes we found the 'lost' jewels!!! Two nice rings, and a bracelet which turned out not to be gold, but plated. They were all on top of a wardrobe in her bedroom. Found money too, all in old notes. I took them to the bank and got it put into my account. From which I can now get Aunt anything she needs or I think she needs, without asking my Uncle for money and having to explain reasons. and have him say she wont want it or she can use the homes.

I have been very tired lately but coping with the problems of this year. I know it's because of the tablets I take. I thought I was ok before and stopped the tablets, I was ok untill my dad was taken ill and down I went fast!! Citalopram is a wonder drug for me. Still taking 40mg a day. To be reviewed after three years. Will not stop the again without the DR. Even though I did it slowly before.

Have a day off work today but working tomorrow.
Had a good lie in this morning, but dont feel good for it!
Love to all xx

Sharron, I need to nudge myself constantly, so must be difficult to have to nudge someone else all the time. I also like to do things for myself. Holidays are hopefully on the coast somewhere and not a full day driving, daughter is 600 klms away so half that would be okay. I have not been fishing for years and would love to do that again, so we are going to get my rods out and see if there is a way to manage fishing for this holiday. OH hates fishing, but is happy to walk along the beach while I fish, so need to work that one out.

OH and I married on the 1 April, so wedding anniversary tomorrow. He had to go away for a meeting today and came home with two beautiful bunches of flowers. Okay got the flowers early, but I had also forgotten about the anniversary. Easter is a difficult time for me as that is when I had my accident. It does not matter that the date is different each year, Easter is the killer. Was in a bit of a panic all day until OH was home safe, so tried to keep my brain busy, thus head in my tree, as sure way to keep me occupied.

Gail