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Depression / Anxiety

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 22 May 2010 04:28

Well my goodness I have had such an evening!! I am absolutely beaming as I write.
About 7pm, miniMary came racing into the back garden where I was doing a bit of weeding. "The WHOLE youth group from the Church is in our driveway" LOL. I thought,it's a bit early for christmas carols, what in the dickens is happening.
Well apparently they were having an all-nighter tonight as they have an 'entertainment fast', so they had to find other things to do besides the usual entertainment.
They turned up at our house, unannounced to ask if there was anything they could do to help us. By 10pm, the entire front porch had a new coat of paint, the wicker settee was painted, the back grass was cut , the veggie patch was turned over and my transplants were planted, the fence surrounding the patch was repaired, and the cedar lawn swing which we were given free, was re-assembled. I didn't count but there were more than a dozen young people on my porch. I am completely stunned. They are coming back in the am to finish the painting.. What a boost to my panic mood, trying to get so many things completed before the dogs arrive. They have no idea how much they have helped me, I have been trying to get the painting done a little at a time, but it's so time-consuming. Now I can focus on other things. One of the boys is a farmer's son and he took charge of the tomato plants, deciding which should be placed where, for maximum growth, best organised my garden has ever beenLOL.
My son is home for a couple of days, so good to see him, I think he's quite happy that there is less lawn to be cut tomorrow!!
Going to put my feet up for a while,
night,all.
Mary

Deanna

Deanna Report 21 May 2010 17:28

A very good idea Mary.... you don't want to freeze, and he doesn't want to FRY!

Joyce... why do you think you must have gone wrong somewhere?
You pass on whatever you think is good for your children, but the are individuals and will make their own mistakes.... not your fault love.

****AND BREAKING NEWS FROM ENGLAND!!!!
Deanna is lovely and WARM TODAY!!!
sun is shinning and the weather is just beautiful.
Long may it last for us.*****

See you all again,
have a peaceful night all.
Deanna XXX

dutch

dutch Report 21 May 2010 12:59

Hello all ,sorry have come on here to moan again remember i put thread up about my son ,well today got another letter asking for 165.80 euro for Golf car our address but another name ,hat to ring Jan as cant cope with this at all he said the name sound english ,i have phone the place up and told them we dont have ahired car but its different Golf to what my son had,anyway there going to look into it as the man said so they have used false address and he said he was going to ring him,but its going to be false phone number is,nt it,and its way down south to were we live,and just like to say thank you to my friend Caz for listerning to me ,as i dont have anyone here i can talk to,sorry to go on again takr care all
and have anice weekend
Dutchxx

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 19 May 2010 18:55

I am warm, sun is shining, the school day is almost over and as yet no phone call to pick up his nibs. YES!!
Gave the front doors another coat of paint this morning and painted a wicker arm chair to set on the front porch. Love the cranberry colour. I am being good to myself, my back hurt so I stopped before starting to paint anything else. Perhaps I should see what Sarah would do with a paint brush!! Judging by what she can do with a bottle of nail varnish, perhaps she should avoid painting LOL.
Deanna if I'm ever tempted to marry again, I must remember to ask if he's hot or cold indoors, could save a lot of battles later. On second thought, I haven't the time to get married and retrain someone all over again. Had enough of that!!
Have a good day all,
Mary

Deanna

Deanna Report 19 May 2010 16:17

Colin, perhaps your Denise and my Allan could change places ?
Allan is always roasting and I am always cold. It is not a new thing, I have always been this way, and my poor husband can barely breath in the heat.
I love him... and mostly ;-0).... he is a gem, but when we argue about the heating......
future news headlines......... *husband found dead in bungalow after putting heating off. Wife helping the police with their enquiries!"

At the minute, he is watering the front garden, and, he has taken the hose from the garden tap at the back and pulled it through the front.... OPEN door!!

Oh and Colin, I am not able anymore so my housework has to be done in small stages.
So if Denise is in a better state than we are, she is welcome to stay ... she would have to sleep in my bed though, as we only have one bed room. Plenty of room , as Allan would be staying with you!
We do the work together, but neither of us is fit so it takes time with rests in between!
I wanted to change the bed today and Allan said... could we leave it until Saturday? I argued to no avail.... that upset me... NOT! ;-0)

Gail, that was lovely of you to sit and wait for your mum.I.L to wake up. Bless her.
When we are in hospital the visits become such a landmark in our days.
I am off. It it so cold here with the front door open!
SO, when are we having the heatwave then?

Love to all,
Deanna XXXX

GranOfOzRubySlippers

GranOfOzRubySlippers Report 19 May 2010 12:27

I so love frangipani and wish it was warm enough here to grow them. There is so much in plants that I would love to grow, jackaranda is another beautiful tree which grows so well in Sydney, I remember a few years ago taking the train to the city and they were flowering everywhere like a lavender cloud.

MIL has been in hospital for a couple of days now, I went to see her today and she was sleeping so spent 2 hours reading beside her bed. Poor love has a chest infection. She eventually woke up and realised I had been there for some time. She was over joyed that I had just sat there while she was sleeping. She looks very tired and has not been getting much sleep due to coughing, with a constant flow of oxygen she has been able to sleep at least, I will not wake a person who is ill as feel they need to sleep as helps with recovery.

I think the change in season is a huge factor in "low times' even for those up north that are coming into spring. I always find it difficult in Autumn knowing winter is near. Have found it difficult this year due to a very hot summer then a sudden drop in temperature does make a difference. Days of 36 then a drop to 16 is huge then nights of minus temps.

Can picture Mary getting her garden ready for planting and wish I could move north for the winter. So glad G had a great day, you must have been so pleased to see the huge change in such a short time.

Colin we used to call the little cakes butterfly cakes, as we would make little wings from the cut out bit. Sometimes my great granny would put a small amount of jam before the cream, sometimes she would put the jam in the centre of the little wings. But those were the days when people sat together and ate their evening meal as well. When everyone is home I always insist the we all eat together. I always made sure when my children were home that the evening meal was everyone, and no TV, music maybe, and loads of talking. At least my lot were tough to cook, but so many young ones today do not have any idea of even putting a basic meal together.

We were in a large fruit and veg shop a couple of week ago and a young lass came up to me asking how to cook different veg, it was nice that she was trying but did not know what half of the veg were, I had great fun explaining and also how to do them differently.

Well off for shower and pj's on and dressing gown and slippers.

Gail

Sydneybloke

Sydneybloke Report 19 May 2010 11:14

Deanna, you may not have done h****w**k but I would not call you a sl**. A grub perhaps, but a tidy house is a sign of an untidy brain. Or something like that.

Sydneybloke

Sydneybloke Report 19 May 2010 11:12

Hello Deanna, Mary, Gail, Liz, Joyce and anyone I've missed, plus our friends who haven't been on the last couple of pages.
Deanna, I think you and my Denise make a good pair. She has some body fat but not a lot, but her refrain at the moment is:
I don't think I will ever be warm again...
It is not particularly cold here, but the sudden drop in temperatures after a prolonged Indian Summer makes it noticeable. Also, her lounge room window is well shaded and once the sun dips behind the building it can be cold.
The shade is from an enormous frangipani tree but it is now, at last, losing its leaves.
Mary, great to see G doing so well. I guess it is hard to manage the dose of the Adderall.
Gail, I understand your thing about layers of clothing. Closer to the coast it is easier, but I had a jumper plus a rain jacket this morning, shirtsleeves at midday and back on with the jumper while waiting for the train-- which was air conditioned.
I am glad to see you a bit more settled Joyce, and like you I wish we could do more for Carole (YCaz) and others who are going through chronic pain. I am a bit of a baby when it comes to pain. I have been getting a bit of sciatic pain when walking so really should lose weight.But my main problem is an inflamed shoulder joint. It is not arthritis, but if I overextend the arm it can be momentarily agonising. But I know it will heal eventually. I hope.
Yes we did our cakes on doilies in the old days. My grandma used to make scones with strawberry jam and cream. And she had what we now call mature onset diabetes. Denise's grandmother used to entertain the younger girl children next door with butterfly cakes. These were cup cakes, a bit scooped out of the top and filled with jam and cream. The bit cut out became a little pair of wings. My mother used to make them, too.
I am also old fashioned. I think thank you is important.
I know that only real insomniacs (and Gail) would be awake at the moment, but I hope you all have a good day.

xx Colin

Deanna

Deanna Report 19 May 2010 10:37

Good morning all, another beautiful day... and Deanna is STILL cold! ;-0)
They say that the fatter you are, the less you feel the cold!!!
They don't come much fatter than me..... and I can tell you all, it is not true!!

Gail the plums come from some foreign climes but are not good.
I actually crave seasonal foods, am I alone in this?

Mary that was a lovely story about your gran, bless her.
When you think of the things kids today take so for granted...
I used to visit my great granny when we came home on leave... and she used to keep us a half-crown/ two and six.Bless her

And didn't we all lay out our cakes on doilies?
Those were the days.... when our family come now, Allan brings in the kitchen roll and the biscuit tin/cake box!
We are such sluts these days.... ha ha ha
The energy has gone so we have to conserve what we have. ;-0)

Anyway... here am again having done nothing yet!!
I told you.... a slut!!

See you all later, have a great day.
Deanna XXXX

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 19 May 2010 00:42

UPDATE: when I got to the school this afternoon, the EA came to the door and said "Let me introduce you to Gareth", who was sitting calmly on the bench waiting for me!!!!! YES!!!. Her words were "he has had the most awesome day". (after a short-lived outburst on arrival when he realised it was not pizza day)
Colleen increased his Adderal this morning and he has been calm all day, speech clearer, actually smiling, even now, when I dropped him off to therapy, his speech was clearer. Usually when you hold his hand there is a sense of resistance, today he held my hand in a relaxed way. He looks more relaxed, could this be a turnaround? Oh I hope so.
I wish chemicals weren't necessary but there we are, we do what we have to do. He cannot learn if he is always frantic.
Thanks for listening to me ramble over this, I have been so upset over him.
Mary

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 18 May 2010 15:56

Oh Gail, me too, I thank everybody and expect my kids and now grandkids to do the same. We are not uncouth individuals, we respect each other, hopefully. We show gratitude, we all need to feel appreciated. I was absolutely livid when I heard E had been reprimanded for politeness. What I couldn't do to that person, I respect the FACT that he is their father but respect ends there, he has just said and done too much rubbish, makes me sick. I adore my grandkids and wish they didn't have to tolerate his nonsense. The kids are finally seeing through his broken promises and lies and frequent cancellation of visits. Life would be smoother without him in the picture.
That's enough Mary, pack away your soap-box.
TTFN

GranOfOzRubySlippers

GranOfOzRubySlippers Report 18 May 2010 15:27

My children were also tough to say Thank You, it is being polite. I thank a waitress for bring me coffee, I thank my doctor after a visit, I thank the lady at the check out, I thank my husband for every little thing he does for me and the list goes on. Good manners cost nothing and makes you a decent human being.

For some people destroying others work is just so easy, obviously the ex has no manners or people skills or is just a pig.

This time of year I dress in layers and either peel them off or put them on, also have an extra cardigan at the back door, usually for about 4 pm when it starts to chill.

Not an eventful day today, which is great as no drama. Have really taken a chill pill today and done nothing except cook tea/dinner and stacked the dish washer. Basically had a me day, which I think we all need from time to time.

Deanna, where did the plums come from? This time of year would be hard to get, so may be they were last years and kept refrigerated, thus tasting nasty.

off to bed

Gail

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 18 May 2010 15:22

Oh Deanna you do give me the giggles . . . you've actually just brought back a lovely memory for me, re 'coffee time'. As a child when I stayed in Finchley,North London, with my Grannie, we had a formal 'elevenses' each morning,sitting in straight-backed chairs,in the big bow window in her dining room. Cafe au lait with biscuits and walnut cake - on doilies of course, oh I loved that cake. Sitting on the sideboard was a Royal Doulton bowl which she kept filled with threepenny bits for our arrival, after elevenses my brother and I headed out with our 3d bit of the day, to the sweet shop. If we bought ice cream we had to keep it for after noon meal - wrapped in newspaper, under the ferns in the back garden for shade. How DID we avoid food poisoning in those days.? Thanks for the warm and fuzzy moment.
Mary

Deanna

Deanna Report 18 May 2010 15:09

Hi folks, I think we are all going through a 'low time' just now.
Joyce, you stick to your guns and do not let him make you feel guilty, as kids often do., the problem is his, and your problem is HIM.
Mary you and your daughter must be heart broken with the problems you have with the children. Then *daddy* takes them out for a one off trip and destroys all your good work! How do they do it??
A gift I think.
You don't have to say thank you to your own people??
WHY?
Are we supposed to take our loved ones for granted? I don't think so.
If I had a wish, I would wish for a pain free life for Carole... and a stress free life for Mary.
For me I would wish for my son to be well again.
Ah well... such is life.

We have a heat wave coming... they say.
But today is cold... as per usual.
It was a beautiful morning, so I washed, and dressed in a summer dress..... eedjit that I am.
It did not last long, the sun left soon after I prepared myself for it!

Coffee time soon so I'm off to my book and have a coffee with my loving husband, who has been a miserable old ***** (choose your own word) since Saturday.
To be fair to him, he is in a lot of pain most of the time... but hey, it's not my fault is it? ;-0)

See you all later.
Liz, I have not forgotten, just waiting for a wee box.

Love Deanna XXXXX

dutch

dutch Report 18 May 2010 07:18

GoodMorning all,Deanna sorry your having some bad days and hope it goes away soon ,not heard anything from the police as yet ,but your right he is in for ashock and im not going to let him try to get me on his side .he did wrong and if he gets punished its know bodys fault only hes to blame,not feeling to good myself in some pain i cant eat im not sleeping
Mary love i do hope things get better for you its not been agood year so far for you ,and you do everything you can for your family
Liz my friend also sorry your having bad days and ive said before text me and i,ll ring you thats what friends are for take care speak to you soon
Y/Caz my friend hope your feeling abit better if i could make awish it would be to take away the pain

Carole ,hope your ok dont see much of you these days ,but no you have alot going on at the moment but still think about you take care talk soon
And for these i have,nt mention may you all have better times ahead
Love Dutchxx
ps off the docters tomorrow as jan is off its his Dads birthday ,so family come to us and we lay flowers on his grave. and then they come back for coffee as church is just round the corner were we live
so jan said see the docter as im off, as the morphine patches are,nt working very well and ive now got server cramp to contend with agani,going to get measure for pair shoes ,as cant walk in normal ones,anyway fokls going back to bed to see if i can get alittle sleepxx

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond

Purple **^*Sparkly*^** Diamond Report 18 May 2010 02:09

Hi all, not feeling great at the mo, altho my counsellor helped when I went yesterday. She says she is beginning to form a real picture of why I hoard etc from the things I have told her from my past, it's taken several weeks but she is really nice and I feel very comfortable talking with her.

Gail, I too am fed up with the way the boards are now, so many people have stopped posting for various reasons, a lot because they are sick of the way others behave, with rows, being patronising, or supercilious etc
At one time there would be 10 pages for me to read through each evening, now I am lucky if there are three per day. I think it got bad when there were so many arguments and people upsetting others and getting bans and such. It scared folk from saying anything.

I have had pms from people who used to post but now just read the threads but don't comment publicly so will pm me with responses sometimes. Such a shame as we used to have a laugh on the threads and now there is little company to be had at times.

Colin, your yellow sofa throws my theory out of the window then lol
I was told at a mind body and spirit fair a few years ago that my aura showed I needed a lot of yellow around me, we have yellow in the curtains in the bedroom and a duvet cover but nowhere else, as it's not my house I cannot go round changing the colour schemes and I tried to get yellow into the bathroom a bit more than the gold/yellow suite which o.h. won't change but am still waiting for him to finish decorating in there, again if I got on with it he wouldn't appreciate it so have to go at his pace, which is slow, slow backward step, slow!

Deanna, I am glad you are seeing a bit of light at the end of the tunnel. I know what you mean about variety in fruit, we seem to have the same old things, bananas - which are great for helping you sleep - and plums, pears and that's about it. We like different things tho, I love pineapples, £1 each in te**o this week, and strawberries, peaches and nectarines, apples if they are stewed, mangos, grapefruit and cherries, and rhubarb too. I do like Kiwi fruits but have to fancy them, don't always, but I also like tinned fruit in juice so keep stocks of that in. O.h. doesn't like tinned fruit, or most of the things I like so doesn't buy them.
I remember when I first knew him, I said I loved avocado pears, which I do, could almost live on them lol One Sunday morning when I had stayed over, he came upstairs with a bowl of fruit for my breakfast in bed - he had bought a tin of grapefruit segments and added strawberries and chunks of avocado pear!!! He thought because it was a pear it was a fruit that you eat with the things he had added lol
He still doesn't eat avocados so I have them when he is on late shift, can indulge in all my favourites on those evenings lol

Mary, so sorry you have had more upset with G. Have you tried sign language of any kind with him ? It's such a shame that he can't communicate so gets frustrated but must be scary for the other children and his teachers, to see him so upset, and of course, it is worrying and sad for you and his Mum and family to see him being brought home from school etc. I hope the doctor can help more than is happening now, or that the dogs can help keep him calmer. Not long now.

take care all, I do think about you often just don't feel much like posting somedays, and earlier today I couldn't even log on, aol was playing silly games again!

Love and hugs
Lizxx

maxiMary

maxiMary Report 17 May 2010 19:42

My goodness I haven't been on here for a while, sorry folks, my chaos caught up with me. Family crisis with my son and his girlfriend splitting, I do hope they can find their way back to each other, we just love her.
And another crisis with my grandson who has had his behaviour spiral out of control, without warning he goes from a sweet,mellow little 8 year-old to a whirling angry beserk dervish. The doctor added a second med to the one he was already on,last week, and some times he has seemed much better. Enter Monday morning. I was called to the school again at 11am today, Gareth completely out of control, had made a shambles of his classroom, sweeping everything off everyone's desk, racing round and round the room, hitting everyone in sight. The instant cure we always hope for has not been found - yet. Apparently they think it started when he was outside for recess, usually will try to interact with his friends, take their hands, or just walk over and touch them. This morning he kept to himself, stayed in one area, VERY quiet. Came back inside and went beserk.
Nobody has the slightest clue as to what triggered this outburst, but obviously something was brewing when he acted atypically outside. I raced to the school to bring him home, the principal was walking him round and round the gym, and eventually Gareth asked to go to the bathroom. When he came out again,he had switched off and they made the decision to try and keep him there, re-establish his routine and see if he would remain calm enough to stay. I stayed at the school for an hour, hidden from him, had a long chat with the principal, who genuinely cares for this child.
Gareth is just so frustrated that we can't understand what he wants, or express what is troubling his memory perhaps. I suspect his frustration has to do, at least in part, with his birth father. When 2 of Gareth's sisters saw their father on friday, they went to a bowling alley for a couple of hours. E thanked her Dad for a drink and he reprimanded her, saying she doesn't need to thank "people in her family, they are supposed to do things for you"!! She came home and asked me if it was wrong to thank me for what I do for her, I told her it was common courtesy, poor child becomes so confused, caught between the opposing attitudes of her parents
Sorry to ramble on, just trying to find a spark that will give Gareth some peace. The service dogs are due to arrive 2 weeks from tomorrow,June 1st., and I have to trust they will help him.
Please don't think I've been ignoring or avoiding you, just haven't the energy for much more than the situation which currently fills my days.
Mary

Deanna

Deanna Report 17 May 2010 09:54

Good morning everyone, how are you all this morning.
I think I am just coming out of another 'low'.
Sometimes I don't even realise that I am in one... is anyone else like that?
Yesterday we were having dinner and I started to tell Allan how I was feeling, which is pretty USELESS!
I did not feel much better for the chat, but this morning I am feeling, not well, but a little better. Ain't life a dragggg sometimes?

Hi Colin, how's yah doin'?
The site was getting a little lonely for a while, but no doubt it was me just feeling off.
We can rarely tell what is wrong when a depression hits can we?
Ah well... a 'brightish' time coming I think.;-0)

Gail I too cannot eat the spicy foods I used to love, and late night eating is a thing of the past.
I had a Kiwi the other evening, I love them, and it upset me so much I had to go and lie down... 7.30... I did feel dreadful. I wouldn't mind, but I had only just 'had a go' at Allan because he seems to think that banana's, oranges,pears and apples are the only fruits in the world!! He is a great man, but still a man and a bit lacking in imagination... oooh feminine nasty coming out there!!!
He said to tell him what I was looking for, so I told him....plums, apricots, nectarines, kiwi's cherries, to name but a few. So he bought me some kiwis, and some plums... along with all the other fruits he usually buys....poor Allan, the plums were horrible and tasteless.. and the first kiwi I ate made me ill!! It's a good job he loves me or I would be in grave danger... GRAVE being the operative word here! ha ha ha

And Gail I now have a wonderful doctor BUT... I too love some of the things said to me by male doctors in the past.
You are so right Gail, it's your weight... it's the weather.... it's your age!!! How helpful is that?

Right everyone, I must go and start.
I have tidied the bathroom.
I have a wash in the machine (two to go) and now I am going to make the bed, and tidy the living room and since I will be in there anyway..... I may as well sit down and read a bit of my book. tee hee

What has happened about the driving fines then Joyce?
See to it that you and Jan get it sorted. Bless you, your son will get an awful shock if this back fires on him. How dare he? AND... he will have a very reasonable reason, and you will be sucked in and feel sorry for him..... DON'T YOU DARE ...... XXX

Have a nice peaceful day every one.
See you later I hope.
Deanna XXXX

dutch

dutch Report 17 May 2010 06:39

Hi Gail,I agree when i first came over here i was,nt as bad as i am now but this arithrits has taken over my body quite alot,but i look at it this way some people are worse of than me so realy should,nt moan ,going to see the docter tonight if jan can get home in time as docters close at 5 oclock and jan gets home 4.50 its only five mins away by car but 30 mins to walk so that lets me out,as we have know transport by were we live ,anyway have anice day,im back to bed now to see if i can sleep
And Good Morning to you all and wish you better days ahead
Dutchxx

GranOfOzRubySlippers

GranOfOzRubySlippers Report 17 May 2010 04:40

Dutch, don't you just hate it when you go to the doctor and they tell you (even with flu) it is part of the aging process. It really get my goat, I already know I am getting older, but docs have been doing this since I turned 40, grrrrrr. So all the injuries I had in my accident are now down to ageing? Some doctors need to get out in the real world.


Gail