General Chat

or Spike Milligan or even

.....find out if Tony is really the long lost son of Marty Feldman....

of Tony's and not his fancy piece. Both Liam and Carla are both staring into Tony's stray right eye ball, waiting for it to pop out. The more angry Tony gets the more the eyeball pops out. Liam is also making sure that his hotpot is nowhere in the vicinity of Tony's eyeball as it may land in it. The pub Rovers regulars are running a book for how long his eye stays in. But Carla gets fed up of staring at Tony and decides to ..........

.....Maria then had an idea, why not take a course in 'how to botox impossible cases' and add this to her C.V......one day Carla might become a client...

Violet thought this was such a good idea - she had always been interested in the fact that Carla's face always looked like a kind of mask and her hair never moved - was she a real person or just a wax figure - did she ever smile - she needed answers to these searching questions and thought that Maria was the one

the woeful Maria. You could then tell her about the fizzing, sexual tension that you have witnessed from behind the bar between the botoxed one and lame Liam

a warm bath, drink of hot chocolate and a cuddle with

you would be better at home with a fish paste sarnie and a nice hot drink but if you dont fancy that you could always have

should really be taking you to a vet I think but on the other hand maybe

given her gut act. By chance Roy had a remedy to cure the cramps, but it not only cured those, Violet started to burp continuously. Roy couldn't believe the reaction Violet was having. Norris was act the bar and grabbed the container the remedy was in, and read the label. The label said to feed only to dogs twice a day for a shiny coat. So an ambulance was called for Violet and when it arrived the Paramedic said.............

twinges - was the spawn of Sean's loins about to make an appearance or had one of Betty's hotpots

to get down the cellar and sort out the mixers. Steve came in with Michelle - she was still looking downcast with over made up eyes and calling Ryaaaaaaan all over the place. Liz had had enough of this and joined Vernon down the cellar. Violet was the only one serving by now and suddenly started to feel

put a plaster on her finger and a big plaster on Vernon's mouth and told him

shove the till where the sun don't shine if he doesn't do something and do it fast. As ever Vernon failed to step up to the mark so she

shut her finger in the till and the drawer was jammed shut.Screaming at Vernon (or Vermin) she told him she was going to

Ignorant as ever Vernon asked "What's boobs got to do with a marathon?" to which Liz replied if you had any you wouldn't be asking such stupid questions. Vernon sat with a puzzled look on his face which soon disappeared when Liz

and i want to run in a marathon for the charity

'HOW MUCH IS THAT GONNA COST'.. If I dont have it done, it'll cost me me back, groaned Liz

When Liz suggested to Vernon that she was thinking of getting a boob reduction he reacted like most men would and said

have thought that she was a patron of the 'Skunk rescue Society'..with that hair!