General Chat

Morning Chris
How you doing?
xx

Two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around B&Q
when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about
that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention
to where I was going."

The young guy says, "That's OK. It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my
wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."

The old guy says, "Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your
wife look like?"

The young guy says, "Well, she is 24 yrs old, tall, with blonde hair,
blue eyes, long legs, big b**bs, and she's wearing tight white shorts,
a halter top and no bra. What does your wife look like?"

The old guy says, "f **k her, let's look for yours

usual apologies no offence intended
xx

A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, "I almost had an affair with another woman."
The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?"
The Irishman said, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped."
The priest said, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say twenty five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, "I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!"
The Irishman replied, "Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that's the same as putting it in!"

usual apologies no offence intended

This ones for you Laura lol

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