General Chat

reading some messages i have to say that i have never ever had any luck of finding my birth mother or anyone that knew her and i do not think i will .i have payed lots of sites to regester me and filled in so many messages i think that it is a load of money making crap if you had loads of money maybe you could pay a private dick but other than that they just make loads of money i really put faith in these people as i needed medical info well never mind it would be nice just once to be able to answer some questions adoped people get asked and just to help you through feeling a little different sometimes oh i will shut up now

Heather, whilst I can understand your disappointment, please bear in mind that those of us who contribute to this site are in the main amatuer geneologists, researching our own families, and not professonals. We help where we can, but please don't get angry with us when we can't. Most of all don't lose faith. You'll get there eventually.

Hello Heather, I can't even begin to know how you are feeling,but please don't give up. Keep posting your messages, keep looking at everything, keep asking and surly before too long you may get some answers, I do hope so ! Kindest regards, Florence.

Heather, I would like to say I understand how you feel. But it would be a lie. I am not adopted and I now who my parents are and wre, my father died a number of years ago. What I would say is do not give up. I think there are a number of sites that help adoptees. Someone onthis site will be able to help you more. You have my sympathy as i can not imagine what it would be like to be in your possition. Just keep trying, please. You know the results will be worth all the effort in the end. Good luck and lots of love Bob

Hi Heather, Just thought I would add a few words,I can half understand how you feel,having tried now for nearly 30years to find my father.Paying for this, paying for that,searching down this route, searching down that,It is endless, but why do we do it,it is not only for medical info,it is because finding that missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle,did they remarry,why did they go, why did they do it.Do we have half brothers or sisters,after a while curiosity just takes over,and we have to find out.Will we really find what we are looking for,I hope so,all I know is that I am a nice person, and I like me,just to let you know you are not alone, I wish you luck,and I wish myself luck.Keep on HUNTING.regards trish

Hi Heather please dont give up i am not adopted so it wasn't quite the same for me but i had searched for my father for years but i finally found him so don't give up hope someone will come along and help you love kath

left message on board for you 4 the feb, mail me., possibly found relative to your birth mum not sure but will pass on info if you like sheila

Heather I know how you feel, I would dearly love to find my dad. But my mum declares she has given me all known info. After contacting Joan at myfolk, I have been told that they don't have enough to go on. So Iguess I'll never know him and he'll never know his granchildren. Do try contacting Joan, she honestly is a lovely woman and was very honest with me and told me I didn't have enough for her to go on. All it cost me was the cost of the telephone call Shelli

Just to give hope to adoptees. I have just come off the phone to an adoptee who was born in the UK. He emailed me on Friday evening to ask if I could help. His mother changed her name by deed poll too. I found her birth but could not connect it to other family names mentioned by the adoptee. I thought I was on the correct trail but couldn't be certain. After ringing the adoptee in America who has had contact with his natural dad, he gave me information that his dad knew about an aunt that also used a different forename. I found the marriage and located her in America. Tonight I made the call to the aunt only to find that the family had been searching for him for years. One very happy adoptee has put his final piece in his jigsaw puzzle tonight. Never give up - there is an answer to every question if you have some facts.

Have e-mailed you direct, but just want to say i really hope everything goes well you deserve it. And to Joan i agree with everything you say i myself made contact with my birth sister yesterday we were both adopted as babies she has been looking for years, but as you say with a few right questions and a lot of luck you can make contact. Have a wonderful day (Heather) With my very best wishes Sheila. P.s. Joans right you should never give up.

Hi Heather, I also cannot say that I know how you feel but I have dealt with number of people in your situation and my heart goes out to you. Don't ever give up. As they say, never say never!Just keep posting those messages. Let me know if you need any site addresses, as there are many out there. I would keep posting in all of them. As Shelli says, for the sake a phone call to Joan Allan she will be very happy to give you any advice. Although Joan at My Folks does charge a fee for doing a full search, it is a small amount compared to many companies out there. I also assist Joan in any Scottish cases. What you have to remember is that there are costs involved. They have to buy all the latest information disks and fiche not to mention the hardware and web sites that you need too. Also if it's Scottish there is a fee to even just get into the records office. We can spend hours and hours on some searches and often with no charge involved. We have to make many telephone calls which are often all over the world. Sometimes after doing hours of work we might find the person that they are looking for and the searcher doesn't get round to sending in the fee. I think that Joan, Debby and myself are truly dedicated in what we do. I really wish you luck in your search Heather. Give My Folks a try, Joan is an amazing woman and will help you if she can. You can see by the many recommendations on this site that is will be worth making that call. Regards Margaret

Margaret, Have you seen Heathers thread Can you help, lets keep our fingers crossed. Sheila. P.s. Just like to say a big thank you to you and your collegues for the work that you do,

Hi Shiela, Sorry, you beat me to it. I was going to send you a message to congratulate you!! Well Done!!! You must both be so thrilled to have found each other. I hope that you are not too far from each other. How long have you been looking? Thank you also for the very kind words. I'm not sure if I have seen her thread, I read so many? Do you know the number of the message? I only do the Scottish side of things as Scottish records are very different to the rest of the UK. She would have to speak to Joan if its not Scotland. Wishing you lots of luck with your new found family. Regards Margaret