General Chat

sorry max lol couldnt resist :0)))))

if vibrators could mow the lawn we wouldnt need men at all :0) sorry just thought i'd put my pennies worth in lol tina xxx

Women: Queen Boudicca, Emily Pankhurst, Joan of Arc, Florence Nightingale, Margaret Thatcher(!!) Men: 'Mine's a pint'

Men, Newton, Einstien, Pastuer,Leonardo,Dickens.Beethoven.... Women, "does my bum look big in this?" Bob

Isn't that a contradiction in itself??!! Sorry that was a bit OT. "Leave the washing up" Really means: If I leave it too she'll end up doing it "I'll only have a quick pint" Really means: I'll be there till chucking out time "I'm just popping next door" Really means: They have Sky Sports, so I'll me watching the match "Don't we have a special day coming up??" Really means: Help I've forgotten when it's your birthday, our anniversary etc "Why don't you treat yourself to something nice" Really means: I'd rather give you money for your birthday as I can't be fagged looking round all the shops "Why don't we ask your mother over" Really means: I'm playing golf that day Lynda

"I did the housework while you were out" (I paid the kids to do it!) Memo to men: Your money buys their help, not their silence!! Rebecca :-)

Darren we've been sussed !

hmmm

Christine :-)

"I don't need to read the instructions." Really means ... "I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help." "What did I do this time?" Really means ... "What did you catch me at?" "I'm going to stop off for a quick one with the guys." Really means ... "I am planning on drinking myself into a vegetative stupor with my chest pounding, mouth breathing, pre-evolutionary companions." "I heard you." Really means ... "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

Sorry john.. it was a moment of madness bought on by lack of achohol due to working on soddin Saturday night..

All right you Impatient lot! I am at work ya know :-(

***start*** When does the footie start ? Where's my dinner ? Fancy a sh*g ? ***goto start ***

Darren mate!! what you giving 'em ammo for???

"Will you marry me?" Really means ... "Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter." "Go ask your mother." Really means ... "I am incapable of making a decision." "You know how bad my memory is." Really means ... "I remember the word to every 'WHO' song, the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the registration Numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday." "I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses." Really means ... "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe." "Football is a man's game." Really means ... "Women are generally too smart to play it." "Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal." Really means ... "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt." "I do help around the house." Really means ... "I once put a dirty towel in the laundry basket." "Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing." Really means ... "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon." "I can't find it." Really means ... "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

Men! Think! Nope I have never heard of that one before.

Blank

Sorry lads......