General Chat

iI write this thread after being constantly annoyed by my own country men and women. I am Welsh and Married and Englishman, our daughter was born in Wales and our son was born in a military hospital in Aldershot in England, i am very proud of my family. We moved back to Wales 10 years ago now and everyday i come across someone with racist comments towards the English. I went for a job interview and was asked if i was Welsh, to then be told this would be good to get your own back at the English through Telesales! well i informed this strange man that my husband and son are English and i would not be requiring his job offer. My son has tollerated racist comments from school friends for a while now, and refused to let me deal with it as it may make it worse, however, this week it extended to physical bullying so my husband contacted the school, who dealt with it and we are grateful for that, but they refuse to agree it was racially motivated,( i can only think because its Welsh versus English and not Asian. Schools obviously think racist is a colour thing.) Today i went to purchase some England mugs from Matalan, as advertised in their brouchure, however i was told because we are in wales they wont be stocking them! I am sick and tired of the bigots i am constantly meeting in Wales. Who do they think they are. We are all the same regardless of where we come from. I am now embarassed to say im welsh and any forms which ask what nationality i am i write British. Does anyone else feel the same

I am Scottish born and bred but moved to England a long time ago (without my family who still live in Soctland) and married an Englishman. The only time i get any remarks are when the football is on. During Euro 2000 I wore a tartan tammy with the red wig (you know the one) when Scotland played and some idiot in the pub siad to my husband "what are you playing at letting her come out looking like that"? Needless to say a riot almost started. Apart from the obvious male chauvenist thing about "letting" me do anything, my husband was incensed that they had the cheek to attack my home when hardly any of them had ever been there let alone know anything about the people or the place. Most of them think Scotland is Glasgow and that's it. I have even had people ask me it I know such and such a person from Glasgow. DUH!!! Apart from that, I always support England at football (maily because Scotland are useless, but I'm allowed to say that!!) Pam

hi juile yes i do feel the same as you i am welsh and married to an english man both my girls where born in wales but it is awful what is said to welsh people by welsh people about english people like you said it is racist. best wishes tracey

Lets face it, humans are tribal. At least the UK form is relatively benign ,except where it has religious overtones. John in Aus

thanks everyone so far for your replys, pam my hubby is from the potteries and his parents are scottish, hubbys very loyal to scots and english, william thanks for apologising but its like you all say its usually a minority, and you shouldnt have to apologise for their behaviour, though it is kind of you. terri i can relate to that my hubby went to a shop other side of Brecon some years ago now, with mates, they were in uniform and thought it amusing that as soon as the staff saw them, started talking in welsh. I just get so angry at that as these were servicemen, people had respect for them at one time. your husbands reaction to the old guy made me laugh, my husband just came to read what amused me. judith do you live near Tenby as it cant be Barry island with lovely beaches!! thanks everyone, i know some parts of wales are lovely but the part im living in at the moment is just so sad, as this seems to be where im finding the the rudeness and arrogance. i agree not everyone just some bad apples.

Hi Julie, Im from Northern Ireland and as such believe that I am both British and Irish,complicated,I know however,whenever I hear people saying that the Irish are thick,I have to retort because Irish people have a tendency to be rated higher in the school league tables and recieve a very good education and many famous intelligent people came from Ireland.It used to bother me when people labelled us because of the old paddy jokes but now I just laugh because I know better.

Fee My wife's family originate from Southern Ireland, her b i l was born in Dublin and my brother's wife is from just outside Belfast. Right little UN, that's my lot.

Going to Aber Uni I've met both sorts- mostly lovely Welsh people, but some who will deliberately speak in welsh to exclude English people, or worse, such as pulling chairs out from underneath english people. What I've found worse is the reaction to coming from near Liverpool- the automatic reaction to my (slight) accent is to make jokes such as 'hold on to your wallet it's a scouser' or the 'Calm down calm down'- which REALLY annoys me. Beka

Julie, I'm sure we have all faced problems regarding the Welsh/English divide at some point. Where I live in Wales, I can honestly say there are as many English families as Welsh, some good, some bad from both. We have some English people who have moved here and go out of their way to cause trouble, throwing up remarks like, they thought all Welsh people lived in caves, all Welsh men s**g sheep, etc., these are the ones who are not made welcome. There are others who move here and make themselves part of things, joining clubs, groups and becoming friendly and very welcomed members of the community. The one time we had trouble with racism, was when my son was being badly bullied at school and the one time he stood up for himself and answered back a girl much bigger than him, who happened to be English, the headmistress contacted me and told me my son would have to apologise to this girl, because her parents was accusing my son of racism and yet all the months she had made my son's life a hell, they didn't want to know. Did we apologise, did we hell, told them to take us on for racism, and they didn't. Not long after the girl was expelled for bullying someone else. M.

I don't think the bullying is necessarily a race thing. Kids (and some people) pick on anyone who is different, and the English accent makes a person stand out from the crowd in Wales. My son (25 years ago) was bullied at school. We were living in a town on the edge of the Forest of Dean and he didn't speak with the forest accent. They said he 'spoke posh'. I think daughter too was picked on but she refused to bite. he hated that school. we moved away to bedfordshire 3 years later and he was never bullied again. I think a few stir the rest up in Wales sadly. We only once came up against prejudice when we were on holiday in North wales and they started talking in welsh when we went into the shop. as I always ignore bad manners that is what I did. Sad though isn't it when we are all one country really. Incidentally I half expected prejudice when we recently went to Scotland but I have to say the people couldn't hacve made us feel more welcome (in Fife). Ann Glos

judith no worries you werent patronising, well i dont think anyone has been, i will say that on the subject of bullys picking up on accents, both our kids have now been in wales for 10 years and they have picked up the accent as its not that strong here in this town, the kids that bullyed our son have been to nursery with him, infants, juniors, play in the local footy team. if the main leader of the bullys spoke out he would admit the reason for the physical bullying was centred around the fact that my boy used to go around town and generally hang round with them in holidays, however when he suddenly started staying in more i asked was something wrong, he only told his grandad (who then told me), that the leader of the above group had been stealing in town and calling him names for not smoking, causing trouble at the towns football team matches. The bully tried to get another lad involved in the attack on my son but this lad walked away when he knew it was my son as he said he was a mate. Pity he hadnt stopped them or got a teacher. These boys are teenagers, they should learn something by now. i know everyone gets racist comments whatever race, but sometimes i just have to let off steam, if i didnt i would be confronting these people big time. Thanks everyone for your comments julie

Hi Julie, Ah, the family feuds of the British Isles (or, perhaps, Celtic Isles, if I'm not to be accused of imperial arrogance! lol! I was born in England of mixed English and Rhodesian parents (now, there's an obvious target for anyone wanting to bring up racial discrimination as a subject!). My grandparents came from Wales, the Scottish highlands, and Tyneside, and I take a pride in them all. I remember being taken along to a meeting of the Huddersfield Welsh Society when I was training there in the late '60s. A little old lady with the archetypical black hat came over and asked me which part of Wales I came from. I replied that I was not Welsh by birth or residence, although of Welsh descent. She then asked me where my family had come from, to which I replied "from the centre, near Aberystwyth. I knew what she was fishing for, as I'd been previously warned. So when she then asked me which part of Wales I preferred, I said that I loved the pretty nature of the North Wales countryside, but I really enjoyed the majesty of the mining valleys of the south. "Oh," she retorted, "I'm a north Walian myself!" And with that, she turned abruptly and departed across the room. Laugh? I nearly fell over!!! In 1966 we were staying in Llangadog just after the famous Carmarthenshire bye-election, when Gwynfor Evans won the seat for the Nationalists. On the Sunday morning, we went to the local (Anglican) church, where the service alternated between English one week, and Welsh the next. We hit the Welsh week, but knew exactly where we were, because all the tunes were exactly the same! In the afternoon we went over to Pantekellin (I'm sure I haven't spelled that right!), where the famous poet William Williams came from. We arrived to look roun the local village church just as the locals were arriving for evensong. All their services were required to be in Welsh, but they persuaded the five of us to join them, because then they could enjoy the luxury of having the service in English for once! On another occasion, we were camping as students in Southern Ireland in 1965, and spent our last night down in Kinsale. We turned up at the local Anglican church for evensong, where we were berated by the minister for 20 minutes in his sermon on the iniquities of Oliver Cromwell and his Parliamentary army of the 1650s! Oh what fun! Philip

Well now look you, Julie Evans it depends on which part of Wales you are living in see. No not really;that is just my bit of fun. I have lived hear in N Wales for fortytwo years and I worked in S,Wales for two years. On tjhe whole I have found that the majority of the people that I have associated with have been very decent people. Some of my best friends are Welsh. However there are bad apples in every barrel and you just have to put it down either a poor and ill informed up bringing or sheer ignorance. It was a lot worse some thirty years ago than it is now. I remember making myself very popular in a local village shop. A certain local lady Very Welsh who made a living doing B&B was going on about the English in Welsh until I asked her Why she had a large B&B sign in her window in ENGLISH, I think that the point hit home, because, that lady gave me a lot of support on a local project that I became involved in. So don't fret yourself, enjoy the love of your husband and son; use two fingers and turn the other cheek. CHEERS Enjoy your life, Ernestxx

that was such a nice thread ernest. it made me smile. and of course you are right i shouldnt fret. my mum, though proud to be welsh would have been so proud of my family, her welsh grandaughter and english grandson, i shall just continue to laugh at these other ignorant people i meet. julie