General Chat

OOch! Dr Legs that hurt! :-((

Doctor Legs, I am feeling much better thank you, that nip of brandy did the trick even if I don't like it. A good nights sleep should work wonders. I am a bit confused as to the chain of command, who is the officer in charge of Kitchen duty or does everything fall under you and the Admiral. Temporary head cook The fat Lady

Are we all agreed that SS Utopia should now move to another thread? I suspect new 'passengers' may be put off by the long and rambling nature of this one now?

ATTENTION! NOW HEAR THIS! ADMIRAL SPEAKING! I am concerned that some of the passengers may have got lost, and cannot find their way back on board. If there are others who wish to join the ship before we sail to the Cape Verde Islands, please join us soon. It is going to be a difficult journey, we shall need people with talent on board, in case of any mishaps! IF NECCESARY, we will delay sailing until tomorrow morning if it is felt that we may miss some of our people.

Evening lazy bugger, how are you, still hanging around the poop deck? have you noticed Weird goings on, besides David trying to get a protection racket going and giving the girls magic mushrooms, someting funny is going on, if you have the energy to keep one eye open I would be obliged.

I'm Still mooching around still no ghostly cockerel, i will get him on the end of my boot them whoosh over board he'll go. Admiral Dorothy i think you start a Chapter two, it'll be easyer to follow. David ( security ) Be Afraid

Thank you Admiral, At your service maa'm!

hi dr legs, loved the anouncement! A nip of scotch if u don't mind...not parcial to brandy myself! It will help to get my blood circulating...

Linda Pace was one of the very first volunteers, as Entertainments Officer. Glad Lindy is now on board. Sorry, your'e feeling so rotten Fat lady, but we'll soon have you better.

Hello! Hello,

My name is FAT LADY.. what happened? why am I in this
horribly smelly bed..gonna be sick again..Yuuk! the smell in
here.. I was suppossed to be joining a ship as assistant cook!
but got lost in the back streets of Lisbon! horrible! horrible!
place. Oooh! full of ladies of the night if we could call them
that..A policeman saved me from been dragged into a Tavern
and when I told him of my plight he called the coast guard to
try and catch the SS UTOPIA. Alas, they were no better and
threw me overboard. Can I help it if I am a FAT LADY and huff!
and puff! Well, how did I came to be in here? I think it is a
sick bay...I feel exhausted and will try and sleep.
Maybe, when I wake up it would have been a horrible dream....
or maybe I will just lie awake and see what happens next!!!

Hi Slutty Jean, I'm back, I just needed to get the cabin boy and my loyal mutt to safety, there is skullduggery afoot not to mention the ghosties and the ghoulies, and I found out today the reason witches don't wear knickers, its so they can get a better grip on the broomstick. boom boom. I,m off now to have a few drinks and start earning!

I thought Linda was the entertaiments officer? Where is she? has she gone AWOL?

Mommylonglegs: I have just received a radio message from Lindy (Asst. Cook) from the rescue boat: she's ready to come aboard again, and feeling rather sorry for herself. Can you get the boat alongside and help her aboard, and talk to her. Glad to hear Revd. is on his way back. We shall need him to bless the ship before we leave for Cape Verde Islands.

Sorry Revd Christopher had to go AWOL - in 'real' life today we visited the crem (it was the anniversary of when my Mum died, and I find it very difficult), and we made an offer on a house that we liked and the offer was accepted. So it's been quite a day! I'll send him back as asap. Joy

ATTENTION, ATTENTION! NOW HEAR THIS! THIS IS THE ADMIRAL SPEAKING! ATTENTION! We shall be setting sail tonight at Midnight! I trust, Madame Purser that all those who went shopping are now on board, or if not that someone is sent into town to bring them back. NOW HEAR THIS! During today, I have been visiting the Portuguese Ambassador, and he has asked us to take a detour via the Cape Verde Islands (west of the North of Africa). These islands are a Portuguese protecterate and he has asked that we deliver a large load of Fishing gear, as Portugal Government wishes to upgrade the fishing industry on the islands. I have not been to Cape Verde before, and as there are some 15 or so islands, navigation may be difficult to find our way to the port of Mondelo, where we shall dock long enough to offload his cargo. The capital, Praia is, I'm told, a beautiful place, and both the port and capital town are good for shopping. We should reach Cape Verde chain of islands by tomorrow night. He also threw some light on our possible ghost in the wine cellar! A pirate who used to do a run from Bermuda to Cornwall with ship loads of Rum is reputed to 'haunt' passing ships on the route, looking for a free passage back to Cornwall to retrieve his stash of Rum. He was killed in a sea battle 200 years ago, and has been 'seen' on several ships ever since. He warned that he can be violent, but if we can capture him, we should throw him overboard, so he can continue to find another ship to hitch a ride on. David, Security Guard, should make every effort to get rid of him! Mommylonglegs! I feel we must have a check on what passengers we now have on our ship! As we are going into unknown waters, we must ensure we have a good crew with us. Daniel has been requested to make sure he has enough materials to build Thatch chalets (as seen in Thailand) on stilts so the water does not lap into the houses. We will set sail for Cape Verde at midnight. Good sailing! Admiral Dorothy

Hello - just dropped in for a chat - been out for a bite! I would have you know Chief Madam, that I tend not to approach laundry staff as they generally smell of bleach and unmentionables!!! Hence, I am not responsible for their disappearance - perhaps they are lying enebriated in a hold somewhere, or perhaps the crocodile has had them - I hope someone on this ship speaks Italian, otherwise we may all be doomed (and it wont do the Security Chap any good shouting "be afraid" unless its in Italian and he has a bloody big gun!!!) Where is the Admiral anyway? - its about time she put in an appearance, if only to keep up the morale of the crew (motley bunch that they are) Also, King Daniel has been conspicuous by his absence!! Offcounting his bricks I suppose - well, he had better watch out as there is nothing nicer than a "young neck" - I'll see you all around - even if you dont see me! Bat Woman Jac

King Dan, I'd like an Art Deco style residence. I will need a large, luxurious bedroom with ensuite bathroom plus a room for the elf. The elf's room needn't be too big as he's happy with a wardrobe at the moment. I will also need a walk in wardrobe with plenty of room for shoes. I don't cook so no need for a kitchen. Gwynne

King Daniel when you build your castle you had better add a big dungeon and a security room and an interrogation room, plus living quarters for the security officers. Are Liz there you are please put down those bottles and get over here we've work to do!!! I'm just going to have a mooch round Be Afraid. David ( security )

Ok I think someone trying to get rid of me Keep on getting locked up - not going to say who with tho. David might need some help getting rid of this thing tho Liz

I'll try not to get too carried away Doc - just give me a bell when she's wheeled in and I'll fly in (I mean, I'll come running) Daniel (the boy king?) my needs are such that a gothic castle built on a hill-side will suffice - failing that, a nice 2-up 2-down will be ok as long as the lavvy in inside and not outside, and I'm no where near the church (church yard yes, church no) Ta - Jac the Mortician