General Chat

Sorry, off to bed with a bottle and a crucifix. See you all in the morning. Viv A.L.

Morning all, Young Nigel and I will be auditioning for most of the day. Legolas has mended all the shoes and is quite happy living in the wardrobe. I'll let him stay now the wailing and elvish songs have stopped. I'm really very concerned about Elaine. I thought Security was going to her cabin? Did he get waylaid by the naughty ladies? Gwynne

Sorry, Manda, Audition will take until this evening. I'm very thorough. Gwynne

I'm on the trail of the man dressed as a cockerel think he's a Spurs supporter, think the only spirits in the cellar are the ones in bottles, so any cockerels or spirits ( not the drinking sort ) i get my hands on will disappear over board PDQ on the end of my boot. Please keep calm we don't want any panic on board, i'll be doing my rounds as soon as i can drag my self away from all these admiring ladies. David ( security ) Be afraid

thanks manda ,back on board and ready to finish my duty to the crew.being a scrubber is hard work you know!!!!!!!!(:

make it a large one chuck....not in to small measures.xx(:

manda seem as your jumping ship around 5.15 i could take over in the bar until 5.30 p.m then they'll have to nominate somebody else.maybe one of the other scrubbers.(might be on monday if not can you look after paul for me.you know how he misses me when i'm not on)no tryin to nick my freebie holidayxxx(:

Ok back much better now. Couldnt sleep for the ache. Have been thinking about this strange man and his seeds. He was dressed a bit odd, sort of like Dick Turpin or Adam Ant with out the paint across his nose, a highway man or a pirate, sort of outfit. I thought he was part of the entertainment. One thing though that I noticed was his eyes, eyes, eyes, e......... Maggie

Admiral, Elaine still hasn't shown up. Shouldn't there be a search party? I'll be very busy tomorrow sorting out the panto so I think we should look for her tonight. Gwynne

Good evening everyone - Jac the Drac here - nice night for it eh? Been very busy today, so had nothing to eat - will be about later looking for a likely candidate (I mean meal....). I'm not sure but I think I met Elaine last night in the Italian Garden (mind you, with all those pyranahs and the crocodile, it was hard to see exactly who was being eaten! Anyone know the Italian for "put down that person you naughty crocodile?") Still no use for my trusty trochar yet - I think it's time the Doctor rounded up some "volunteers" for us to practice on, so that when we are really at need we will be perfick! Hey ho sluts and slappers, have a good night - perhaps see you later? Jac

Any chance I can try my resussitation techniques on the wet cold lady please Doctor - feel like a spare part at the moment! Jac the Mortician

PROPERTY DEVELOPERS MEETING: Admiral Dorothy has sent an envoy to me regarding property when we arrive. As King of the island and the only person who brought building materials, I shall first be building a palace. After that I shall be moving on to residential areas. Please leave a brief description of how you would like your property to be. Your King, Dan

I'll try not to get too carried away Doc - just give me a bell when she's wheeled in and I'll fly in (I mean, I'll come running) Daniel (the boy king?) my needs are such that a gothic castle built on a hill-side will suffice - failing that, a nice 2-up 2-down will be ok as long as the lavvy in inside and not outside, and I'm no where near the church (church yard yes, church no) Ta - Jac the Mortician

Ok I think someone trying to get rid of me Keep on getting locked up - not going to say who with tho. David might need some help getting rid of this thing tho Liz

King Daniel when you build your castle you had better add a big dungeon and a security room and an interrogation room, plus living quarters for the security officers. Are Liz there you are please put down those bottles and get over here we've work to do!!! I'm just going to have a mooch round Be Afraid. David ( security )

King Dan, I'd like an Art Deco style residence. I will need a large, luxurious bedroom with ensuite bathroom plus a room for the elf. The elf's room needn't be too big as he's happy with a wardrobe at the moment. I will also need a walk in wardrobe with plenty of room for shoes. I don't cook so no need for a kitchen. Gwynne

Hello - just dropped in for a chat - been out for a bite! I would have you know Chief Madam, that I tend not to approach laundry staff as they generally smell of bleach and unmentionables!!! Hence, I am not responsible for their disappearance - perhaps they are lying enebriated in a hold somewhere, or perhaps the crocodile has had them - I hope someone on this ship speaks Italian, otherwise we may all be doomed (and it wont do the Security Chap any good shouting "be afraid" unless its in Italian and he has a bloody big gun!!!) Where is the Admiral anyway? - its about time she put in an appearance, if only to keep up the morale of the crew (motley bunch that they are) Also, King Daniel has been conspicuous by his absence!! Offcounting his bricks I suppose - well, he had better watch out as there is nothing nicer than a "young neck" - I'll see you all around - even if you dont see me! Bat Woman Jac

ATTENTION, ATTENTION! NOW HEAR THIS! THIS IS THE ADMIRAL SPEAKING! ATTENTION! We shall be setting sail tonight at Midnight! I trust, Madame Purser that all those who went shopping are now on board, or if not that someone is sent into town to bring them back. NOW HEAR THIS! During today, I have been visiting the Portuguese Ambassador, and he has asked us to take a detour via the Cape Verde Islands (west of the North of Africa). These islands are a Portuguese protecterate and he has asked that we deliver a large load of Fishing gear, as Portugal Government wishes to upgrade the fishing industry on the islands. I have not been to Cape Verde before, and as there are some 15 or so islands, navigation may be difficult to find our way to the port of Mondelo, where we shall dock long enough to offload his cargo. The capital, Praia is, I'm told, a beautiful place, and both the port and capital town are good for shopping. We should reach Cape Verde chain of islands by tomorrow night. He also threw some light on our possible ghost in the wine cellar! A pirate who used to do a run from Bermuda to Cornwall with ship loads of Rum is reputed to 'haunt' passing ships on the route, looking for a free passage back to Cornwall to retrieve his stash of Rum. He was killed in a sea battle 200 years ago, and has been 'seen' on several ships ever since. He warned that he can be violent, but if we can capture him, we should throw him overboard, so he can continue to find another ship to hitch a ride on. David, Security Guard, should make every effort to get rid of him! Mommylonglegs! I feel we must have a check on what passengers we now have on our ship! As we are going into unknown waters, we must ensure we have a good crew with us. Daniel has been requested to make sure he has enough materials to build Thatch chalets (as seen in Thailand) on stilts so the water does not lap into the houses. We will set sail for Cape Verde at midnight. Good sailing! Admiral Dorothy

Sorry Revd Christopher had to go AWOL - in 'real' life today we visited the crem (it was the anniversary of when my Mum died, and I find it very difficult), and we made an offer on a house that we liked and the offer was accepted. So it's been quite a day! I'll send him back as asap. Joy

Mommylonglegs: I have just received a radio message from Lindy (Asst. Cook) from the rescue boat: she's ready to come aboard again, and feeling rather sorry for herself. Can you get the boat alongside and help her aboard, and talk to her. Glad to hear Revd. is on his way back. We shall need him to bless the ship before we leave for Cape Verde Islands.