General Chat

feel really sad and tearful today after hearing the news about gaynor on here yesterday and have just left my job after 15years with the majority of people i worked with back then.just got back after saying goodbye and feel a little worse for wear on my second bottle of vino and it's only 3.20p.m.lynda can you tell us a few jokes to cheer me up alittle as i'm not smiling at the moment.got my kleenexes with me.wheres all my other pals.speak to me i need cheering upxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

yes i might just do that.thanks manda.take carexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

How about this one: Two priests decided to go to Hawaiian vacation. They were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed, they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc. The next morning they went to the beach dressed in their "tourist" garb. They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a "drop dead gorgeous" topless blonde in a thong bikini came walking straight toward them. They couldn't help but stare. As the blonde passed them, she smiled and said, "Good Morning, Father. Good Morning, Father, " nodding and addressing each of them individually. Then she passed on by. They were both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests? Determined to remain anonymous, they went back to the store the next day and bought even more outrageous outfits. These were so loud you could hear them before you even saw them. Once again, in their new attire, they settled on the beach in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine. After a while, the same gorgeous topless blonde, wearing a string, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them. Again she nodded at each of them, said, "Good morning, Father. Good morning, Father," and started to walk away. One of the priests couldn't stand the mystery any longer and called out, "Just a minute, young lady." "Yes, Father?" "We are priests and proud of it, but I have to know: how in the world did you know we are priests, dressed as we are?" "Father, it's me, Sister Angela." she replied.

thanks lorr.i'll be alright i think it's all got too much for mexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

brian that was brilliant.a few more of those and i'll be smiling againxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

OK: Sharing,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,!! A little old couple walked slowly into a McDonalds one cold winter's evening. They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating there that night. Some of the customers looked admiringly at them. You could tell what the admirers were thinking. - "Look, there is a couple who has been through a lot together, probably for 60 years or more!" The little old man walked up to the cash register, placed his order with no hesitation and then paid for their meal. The couple took a table near the back wall and started taking food off of the tray. There was one hamburger, one order of French fries and one drink. The little old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half. He placed one half in front of his wife. Then he carefully counted out the French fries, divided them in two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, and then his wife took a sip as the man began to eat his few bites. Again, you could tell what people around the old couple were thinking. "That poor old couple." As the man began to eat his French fries, one young man stood and came over to the old couples' table. He politely offered to buy another meal. The old man replied that they were just fine. They were used to sharing everything. Then the crowd noticed that the little old lady hadn't eaten a thing. She just sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally sipped some of the drink. Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy them something to eat. This time, the lady explained that no, they were used to sharing. As the little old man finished eating and was wiping his face neatly with a napkin, the young man could stand it no longer and asked again. After being politely refused again, he finally asked the little old lady, "Ma'am, why aren't you eating. You said that you share everything. What is it that you are waiting for?" She answered, . . . . [This is great - scroll down!] "The teeth!!!"

Lynda I won't bother to post the other 310 then.

i was cheering up until i read pauls thread about leaving.i'm even more depressed now.starting to like the old fella.PLEASE PAUL DON"T GO I'LL MISS YOU AND OUR LITTLE CHATSxxxxxxxxxxxxxx