General Chat

There is a place I am not sure but at time I got help it was called THE FAMILY FUND you have to write maybe if you search on web ferret or google I only got for eldest but they gave me money every year for a holiday or days out,beds,bedding and delivered a new washing machine and tumble drier your child has to be bad but not sure how bad now as didn't get for middle son could be worth checking. Tickle Pink can the hospital get on to Social Services for more help that would be worth try

Your welcome Valerie, there have been some really nice people on here that have given me support and it's really nice to be able to give something back. Nicola xx

Thank you very much will look up sites after my dinner it is good to know this site is here and people do help with advice when they can and we can give each other support even with just a few words means more. Nicola we should never doubt ourselves as long as we know we tried to me thats all that matters val

Valerie Yes they don't listen to us parents, all they do is Criticise us parents to the point when we start to doubt ourselves. Nicola xx

By Linda take care and chin up, I will always be hear to listen if you would like to offload. Nicola xx Valerie there are some great sites out there for parents, one of them that is good is the cheeky monkeys at: http://cheekymonkeys.netfirms.com/ the other is adders http://www.adders.org/ Hope this helps Nicola xx

I agree with everything said I had to fight for help since my oldest boy was born I have not had respite or anything. I wish they would listien to us mothers we know when there is something wrong

HI Nicola It would be nice to see somebody to get angry with there is nobody, got to go now my timne is up in the public library Linda P

Oooh Linda All I can do is sympathise with you, I know how hard it is having a child with special needs myself. It makes me so angry that all these professionals dish out all this advice, without having a clue what it's like telling us what we need to do. Then they just pack us off and just expect us to get on with it, without any help what so ever. I took a drastic step last year and self referred myself to Social Services because I couldn't cope. That was a big step for me having a bad experience of being in care myself and being let down. They said that they couldn't do much for me as my son hasn't got a firm diagnosis of Aspergers and even if he had I don't think much would have been done to help us. I'm not a violent person, but sometimes I just want to punch these professionals because of their attitude towards us as parents. One of them said to me, why do you feel the need to know what is wrong with your child and then she said, well there won't be much different in the help your child would get. I told her that there would be a lot of difference, as teaching a child on the Autistic Spectrum is different to teaching a child with ADHD. I'm not knocking all professionals because most of them do a fantastic job considering they are under so much pressure. But when you get the ones that can't even be bothered to listen to what we are saying, that's what annoys me the most. Nicola

HI Sue Iknow what you mean abour professionals backing off, I had great support until my son was 18 (he has severe learning difficulties) including respite etc, and then it all disappeared, no social worker, no respite carer, nothing, If I want him to go into a social services daycentre it will cost me £11 a day and that is without a cooked meal, just a packed lunch from home, If I want respite it will cost £10 a night, I'm on benefits how can I afford this. Linda P

Hi Sue I am so sorry that Social Services let you down, I'm afraid to say that unless you pay for something professionals don't seem to listen to what us parents say. I have been battling the system since my boy was 18 mths old, at first they seem to listen and that was only because they thought he might have epilepsy, after that not much happened. My boy is now 8 1/2 and I am now having to got private to get the diagnosis that my son needs. I'm hoping we will at least get some results from the assessments. Nicola xx

my 3 boys all have ADHD and survived to make it to 16,19 and 22 my youngest also has dyspraxia and is dyslexic. I am pleased to say my daughter age 20 is fine. As my youngest was leaving school and the so called professionals started to back off i decided to go private and have an assessment on myself as a psychotherapist for the boys suggested i might have it.As the psychotherapist is the only professional i believe in and trust i thought a lot about my past and how scatty my father was-- maybe he had it.This then started my family history search!!! my assessment proved i had it and was the best money ever spent....i only wished social services looked into my family history a bit more before taking my children into care.

hi maz i have little girl with down syndrome and a boy with dyspraxia and no one has ever offered info on these spacial needs always had to find out for myself. i look at thread board all the time so its nice to see a thread for special needs. sam: )

THANKS MAZ FOR INFORMATION WILL CHECK OUT LATER. At least with your thread people know there are not alone cheers VAL

I have to say that I think that it would be a good idea if everyone kept nudging this thread to the top. As some of you know, I have a son who has ADHD and a question mark hanging over whether he has Aspergers. There are times, well most days really, when things become very difficult for us to handle at home. I believe that there are more people out there that have the same problems and just want someone to talk to or ask for advice. It's so much easier talking to someone who know's exactly what we are all going through, rather than talking to someone who dosen't. Could I make a suggestion that everyone deletes their nudges so that this thread hasn't just got nudge on it. Nicola xx

Valerie - its spelt Dyspraxia - if you google it you should find a lot of info! Maz. XX

This is such an important topic I make no apologies for nudging it Rose

I have 3 boys 1 of my boys is 18yrs old now he has ADHD, METHYMALONICACIDURIA and HYPOGLYCEMIA my middle boy is 12 yrs old he has ADHD, speech problems has not long been STATEMENTED only because I pushed it as my eldest didn't get help did test when he was 15yrs and 6months reading and writing ten yr old had more help when went to college and my youngest who is 6yrs old has DYSPRACCSIA not sure of spelling he has problems writing and falls over when walking and might be DYSLEXSIC as well he can't eat food with knife and fork uses hands as they hurt though he is very bright

Can I assure you all that there is light at the end of the tunnel. A friend of mine's son has what I believe to be mild Autism. He has never been diagnosed as such but seems to have all the textbook symptoms (speaking as someone who trained in child care and development.) He has been through the education system and after leaving school went to college. Well, though he was unemployed for over a year he has now got himself a job. It's not the best job in the world but it is in a field that he finds interesting and his parents have had glowing reports about his performance.

my eldest was statemented a few years ago,the trouble i had getting help was terrible.they kept saying he was naughty.eventually they listened after alot of shouting that he did have a problem.he is dyslexic and did have delayed speach.he has an lsw 4 days a week and is doing really well.my 4th started school this time.what fun!she has delayed speach and suffers from adhd.she too was classed as a naughty child until diagnosed.she hates supermarkets,last visit ended up with me charging out in a temper as some old bag decided to give her opinion,believe me if she had been 20 years younger i would have knocked her block off!!both have settled into school really well.i think people are too quick to judge kids.mine are very good most of the time.come off it we all have bad days!

Thanks for the nudge, As I said my son is a trainee teacher, this afternoon his session was about inclusive education. I just thought it would be good for him to see this, from parents' perspective. Thanks Suex