General Chat

I'm probably being thick but I don't see how upgrading from non member to paid member suddenly stops someone being an information seeking psycopath. If a non member wants to stalk someone on here I doubt whether a cost of £9.50 will put them off. Does it necessarily follow that all paid members are really nice altruistic people that would never be nasty to another person ?

I used to go by my real name on here, with near disastrous results. Ok, it was mostly my own fault for putting personal information on here. But my 'problem' came, as far as I'm aware, from a non-member who could read the board. I will never use my real name on here again - I'm still nervous of this site even without my real name up. But when I see so many of you happily reeling off where you live, what you do for a job and even putting your childrens' names up, I want to scream! This is a really stupid thing to do and I don't care who is offended by this or who thinks I'm paranoid. Believe me, I KNOW what can happen! I would love the management to remove all 'where do you live' and 'what do you do' threads that encourage the exchange of personal info. These threads are dangerous. Bev

Wow, I did open a can of worms here. The general consensus seems to be that we would all be happy having an'Identity' which doesn't change, is accessible to members, and need not be our real name. It also seems to be the consensus of opinion that certain Boards, General & Chat, should have limited access for members only. Is this a fair summation? Jim

Having been a member since November and having read the posts regarding the use of real names I would like to make the following comments. 1 Even if real names are used (which God forbid if the experience I've had is anything to go by) there is nothing to stop any barred person signing on in another ficticous name. I beleive that this is not only possible but may have been done. 2 Surely the Management know the real names where a non de plume is used and surely the number of the member will be known to them irrespective of the name being shown. If it is not there is something radically wrong with the security system. 3 I have now experienced 3 major upsets on this site and if there is one thing in my life that i have been taught and I stand by it is injustice to any one.. Being neutral from the word go, I have seen who the real trouble makers are not by downright offensive threads and posts but by intimidation. 4I wrote to GR at the request of a thread put on the boards last week and requested a personal reply and one that could be put on the board for all to see . Neither happened. 5 As I have said my experience of using birth names wold not allow me to continue on any site. If I have upset anyone by this post I apologise but I will not be intimidated into giving my real name (suname really) simply because people will not take the trouble to read between the lines on certain threads and either ignore or report it. If GR were to do what I suggested named and shamed should answer the problem to som e degree. Not perfect but what in this world of ours is? Rupert Bear.

Sally..I posted earlier and thought I was being clever by adding my real name..anyway when Ive read the rest of the postings I realised how silly I was being..I ve deleated the bit with my name in.. Anita :)

Lol Sally!

For personal reasons there is no way I would agree to my real name being put on these boards. I think it would be highly inadviseable. BC

Alough the General board and chat should be totally inaccesable to non members The genealogical boards ie; Tips/Records office/ success board Should all be availiable to read to non members, as this encourages interest in the site and its purpose. Also I agree that we keep our board names, but at the very least our correct First name & number should be visable when we click on a name, for security purposes. And our surname should be avaliabe for Gr to see only. (if we make that choice) Elaine x

I started off on this thread by saying that I had no problem with Jim's idea, but having read some of the replies on here I am now seriously quite worried - and obviously very niave! I would never dream of collecting info about others but I can now see that not everybody is as stupid as me Jeanette x

Gwynne, Yes - and if we all did that, it would completely destroy the purpose of the exercise Jim has suggested, but nobody could stop us doing it - which suggests it would be futile to instigate any change. CB >|<

If my private emails are anything to go by I think a lot of people will leave if they are forced to use their real names. I'm made of sterner stuff. I'll leave then join again under a fake name or my dad's name or my husband's. I refuse to be googled by complete strangers. Or tracked down via any other websites. Gwynne

In theory it's a great idea Jim but as several people have raised the issue of security I don't think you could get it to work. I don't use my real name because there are so many Sue's on these boards but I think most people who need to know, do know exactly who I am. I do agree with Pat that non-members should not have access to the boards and I constantly forget that anyone can dip in and gather information about any of us. I think I'll have to watch my rather over-informative postings from now on! Daisy

Will we have to produce birth or marriage certificates to prove our identities when we join?

MY board name is obviously just that. I don't use my proper name on here becasue i don't want to be too obvious to others as i am researching an adoptive route. However If i find a match on a name board or email someone who 'needs to know' or just that I 'want to know' i sign off with my proper christian name. Until i have positive response from someone i still do not include my surname. It is so easy to compile personal profiles of people and it-has happened on here not so long ago. All the info was there to be read......was read...and used with malice. Sorry not going there! Birthday greetings are lovely....but i won't get one.Its not June the poster that is the problem is anyone else that sits and reads it. jess jess

Well, I don't care what anyone else says, having very distinctive real names makes it very easy for people to track down somebody. Having had previous problems with 'undesirable attentions', I don't necessarily want the world, his wife et al to know who or where I am. I'll happily impart that information to anyone who I feel needs to know it, but I'm not being railroaded into using my maiden name or my married name, and if it comes to that, then I shall be leaving GR and FR for good. I've NEVER done anyone any harm to anyone on these Boards, under my own name or any others I've adopted from time to time for whatever reason, I just don't like my given names and have had to endure lifelong 'funny' remarks about my names, which are sickeningly boring, to say the least. Why don't you all get GR to remove the bullies and troublemakers from the site - THAT would solve the problems! Just, please, leave us cowards in peace. CB >|< (for the duration of my membership)

I have to say Elaine Im in agreement with you on that one... Anita

good idea and also for non members NOT to be allowed to view the non genealogical general board. AND CHAT (to stop trouble) Elaine x

First - I agree with Gerri and Maz on their points of view. Second - I did NOT appreciate that the boards could be viewed by non-members - this is not ON! Third - some of us have private lives that we don't want aired to someone who might have a connection with us, if we put our own names up instead of aliases. I really enjoy reading everyone's POV on such varied subjects and have picked up some good tips/laughs, in the short time I've been a member. Lily

Hi Pink Diana, I wasn't meaning you - I know who you are, I think all regular posters do. I was listening to the Moodies when I typed. The names I'm thinking of don't have colours in them. Gwynne

I have nothing to hide and would happily have my real name available for look up..... it's Diana Hennis if you don't know already!! Pink xx