General Chat

I knew it was going to be hard but I wasn't prepared for all the paperwork. My daughter took on a lot of the responsibility because I was overwhelmed.

I finally managed to tell the last of our friends about 3 weeks following his passing. I felt that the order I informed people was very important, family then close friends, authorities then the awful trickle down of news.

I have been in shielding measures since day one but that went to pot as I needed people around me.

Last week I spent two nights at my daughter's house just to get away from home. It was approved by my GP surgery, they have been monitoring me and the benefit far outweighed the risk. As the children are not at school we all felt that the risk would be low. In all honesty I really needed two days of what passed for 'normal'.

My neighbours have been wonderful and have tried to help me in every way. The support from FB and GR friends has kept me going some nights.

My son is stuck in Guatemala and obviously friends still can't come and stay with me. The virus has meant that grieving has been a lonely affair.

Now I'm ready to start planning my future, I have to face it and not become insular (which is just not me). I have to admit though that it's really scary.

Thanks to everyone who sent me private messages, each one meant an awful lot.

Sue x

Death never comes at a good time but this has happened to you at the worst time possible.

Well done for taking an enormous step and thinking about the future - it is a good start.

So very hard for you Sue and I do think of you a lot, particularly in the Lockdown situation. It is difficult to avoid putting oneself into the same awful situation after a long happy marriage. I think to us you have coped well. But we don't see you on the bad days. I am glad that you have good neighbours and are blessed by having family reasonably near. I really don't know how I would cope.

I am sure you will go on coping and will gradually rebuild a future, not what you have planned but being you, you will do it and it will be a good one.

I will go on thinking of you and wishing you well. <3 <3 <3

Sue <3 <3

You have done amazingly well in the circumstances and hopefully as the lockdown eases and you can be with more people you will gradually find a new life for you.

Thinking of you <3

Florene in the hebrides

<3 <3Sis <3 <3

<3 <3

Sue

It will be hard but can only say go with what suits you


Decide when you are ready to get out and about and maybe join local groups

I found the U3A and they have branches all over the U.K. and local groups may have coffee mornings etc

I also joined a luncheon club sponsored by our local council who have a lunch ever month at a local hotel and do outings too

It’s doing what is comfortable for you when you are ready


I was lost at first after hubby passed especially as I was his carer and my world was looking after him.To then think it’s just me now was a big adjustment


Look after yourself

<3 <3

Oh Sue, I really feel for you having to deal with your sudden loss during such a difficult time.
There always seems to be yet another piece of paper or information to deal with, but slowly it gets done and you rebuild your life into what is right for you.

How lovely to stay with your family and spend time with your grandchildren. I bet they were so pleased when you did that.

Family and good friends are such a great help, but only you will know what is the right way forward for you.

Sending a ((hug))
<3 <3

Sue take care <3 <3 <3

*hugs* <3 <3 <3

Thank you for the kind words of support, I know I will cope, as some of you have it’s just the acceptance of a totally different future I find difficult.

Hubby was my carer so we are looking into help around the house and garden. We had help when the children were little but that was our choice totally different to being forced to admit I’m struggling. Although I do manage the most bizarre tasks - changing the drive belt on my vacuum!!! Shame I can’t bend down and clean the bath!

Thanks again

Sue x

Sue ....

You are doing amazingly well after such a shocking change in your life.

I'm in awe of you!

Take life as it comes, goes at your own speed, and pay no attention to anyone who says that you should do this or that right now.

Take care xx

Thanks Sylvia,

Some days I do need encouragement to get on with tasks, it would be all to easy to sink into more severe depression.

X

<3 <3 Sue <3 <3 Take Care lovely Lady ((((((((hug)))))))) xx Barbara x

Thanks x

Thinking of you Sue. Don't worry about the things you are unable to do at the moment. Most thinns can wait, and wait, and wait......

When I have had difficult days I just try to make sure that I have adequate food each day.
The other job I consider important is putting the rubbish out each week.


I don't use the bath anymore Have now got a walk-in shower. Much easier to use and clean.

perhaps you can treat yourself when Lockdown is over.

i don't know if grants are available.


Meanwhile take care and remember that you have friends and family longing to help you.

Tess, I do have a separate shower but it's easier to use my powered bath lift. We installed a disabled friendly bathroom a couple of years ago.

It's the cleaning of the bath I can't manage :-(

I keep looking at the house maintenance which was due to be continued this year by hubby. Even at 70 years old he thought nothing of clambering over the roof. Up and down his tower scaffolding and ladders!

The chap that installed the bathroom has offered to help with anything I need but I'll have to prioritise the jobs (and costs) once he has inspected the long list lol

Sue x

Sue ...... are there any grants available for maintenance for the disabled and to help you stay in your house?

It might be worth investigating

I am so sorry to hear your sad new its a bit late to say, but I don't come on here much these days.
Sending you love and hugs <3 <3 <3