General Chat

Sounding Brass

Corinthians

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

Corinthians

This Irish fellow saw a small mirror for sale in a shop window. He was greatly impressed saying to himself “That’s a lovely picture of my deceased father” & so he bought it.

He didn’t tell his wife about the purchase & kept it in his trouser pocket because he knew she didn’t particularly like the old fellow.

During that long winter’s evening, he regularly took out the mirror to admire the lovely picture. But as all wives are, she didn’t miss much.

When eventually the husband went to bed, she searched through his pockets & retrieved the small object.

Looking at it, she exclaimed with a shock: “Ah so - he has started carrying on with another woman - and she doesn’t look much to me”.

She sent for the Parish Priest & instructed him to have some stern words of advice with her wayward husband.

“Show me the picture” said the Parish Priest.

“Ah Mrs - your eyesight must be bad. That’s not a picture of another woman. Sure, isn’t that the Parish Priest who was here before me.” :-D :-D

If we had a grumpy face, we were told to stop it or we would make the milk turn sour.

I remember being in infant school and a girl told me that you shouldn't look into a mirror in a darkened room or the reflection would jump out and chase you...... That worried me for years.

Shirley I did that with a dinner and got the same :-D :-D :-D. If I had a grumpy face my Dad would say if it's frosty you'll stay like that. :-D :-D. Also if I was being silly jumping about he would say "If you break your leg don't come running to me "

Never heard that one Namelessone. If my Dad asked me to do an errand and I complained he’d say “What’s the matter? Got a bone in your leg?”, and if I came in a bit grubby from playing outside I was, apparently, “as black as Newgate’s knocker”.

When we had a runny nose my dad always said (there are actions with this - work them out)

See that soldier over there with the red stripe down his trousers.

Go out with wet hair and catch pneumonia.

Sit on a cold step and get piles.

:-D :-D

My Dad told me that my Nan on mum side married a Mr Fremantle in Australia, no she lived in Fremantle in Australia.

My Dad said 'Do what you want but keep your nose clean.'

I did and I did. :-D

He also told me that the surname we used was not our real one ... and he was right. :-D

My mum used to donate our clothes which were to small to Oxfam and we wondered how they knew who were the same size as us.

If you dawdled over eating something.usually cos you didn’t like it , then mum would say eat up the starving children in Africa would love that

Got a clip round the ear one time , after a look of astonishment, when I cheekily said well send it to em then

When carrying a lot of things and I complained my mum would say Donkeys go best well loaded, my mother in law would tell hubby that it is a lazy mans load.