General Chat

You'd think not.....but.....first problem Allan has a svelte body not Santa like at all (you're welcome Allan :-D)......so once at the Mall Allan sought out the nearest fast food joint and he stumbled upon......

Not a lot I'd just have to sit and look jolly and be nice to all the little darlings who've come to see Santa, can't be that hard ,can it?....

"Blimey," thought Allan "that random thought was the most random of them all!"

Allan went off looking for a Mall in need of a Santa as he already said what could go wrong with that plan......

apart from Sundays' wailing in the local parish church trying to avoid divine discontent or worse even.

Avoid the secular society for the next few weeks & refrain from speaking to any local protean politicians.

Just remember that to an optimist, falling down is the first step to getting up again whereas a pessimist complains about the noise when opportunity knocks loudly on his/her front door.

"I know" he declared loudly "I'll be Santa down at the Mall".....now what could go wrong with that plan......

"Set him a task," replied Doc.

"He obviously is a man on a mission, so would do well with a purposeful cause to be involved in."

Allan thought about this and decided...........

With a time delay of a few weeks in his random memories for some unknown reason. Allan decided it was all of the above.
So how to deal with the situation "Doc what is the easiest way to deal with my demented little Irish man personality?"....

The sleeplessness was caused by some confusion.

He had spent many years believing he had emigrated to Australia, but now it seems he has been living in the USA all the time,

None of those events - but the appalling battle seen on TV over the US Supreme Court verses Brett Kavanaugh showed how close the nation is to total collapse.

Allan is very worried about his dose of sleeplessness.

Or is when I kissed the Blarney Stone and fell on my head, or that I drink too much Guinness ?

:-D :-D

"How about we work on the demented Irishman first," Allan said "Before he rolls into someone even worse.....the woman can wait"...not a fact Allan thought he would ever state..."So why do I morph into him is it because I love potatoes so much? or is it because OH tends to call me a Leprechaun due to my height?"

Allan slowly came out of the deep hypnosis that the Psychiatrist had induce in him

“Wow!” he exclaimed, “I did think that coming to see me about your anxiety relating to your forthcoming holiday was a bit extreme, but I now appreciate just how badly you are suffering.

It’s almost as though you are suffering from a form of Multiple Personality Disorder. I got the distinct impression that the majority of these ‘entities’ are women, although, and I may need treatment myself,” he said, laughing nervously, “At one point I thought that I could discern a demented Irishman.

All these personalities seem to have their own narrative and want to influence your psyche as to how your trip should progress”

“Is there any cure?” queried Allan.

“I’m in two minds,” responded the worthy doctor

“You’re lucky,” replied Allan, “From what you’ve told me, I’ve got at least five to choose from!”

“I need to think about this. Make six appointments for next week”

“Six?” shrieked Allan, “Will it take that long?”

“No” said the doctor, with a smirk, “But that’s one for you, and one each for your other guests”

Allan had to rub his eyes to make sure he was seeing right.....his wonderful OH AND the lady with the lovely bunch of coconuts....paradise....but this being a story about Allan and his travel woes we all know that couldn't last don't we.......

In a hammock being fanned by the young women with the lovely bunch of coconuts...

Allan laughed "It's always the stranger that gets asked directions no matter where you go hey lads?".....having established all were hungry they looked for more crabs to eat. Later as Allan entertained them with his travel woes, OH was to be found......

Was left to face the returning natives,and brave warrior that he was he met the boat coming ashore and asked is there a MacDonalds nearby ?.........

.... they all looked very hungry. Allan turned to talk to his oh but found he alone.......

OH looked confused....then embarrassed....then annoyed.....when Allan finally awoke he assumed OH must have knocked him for six....he swears the crab was laughing at him...or was it the big frilly knickers OH was waving in the air right now??...."hang on those aren't hers" thought Allan....."they're mine!!"

Eventually a small boat arrived from the ship, it seemed to be full of laughing sailors all pointing at Allan for some reason.......then he realized why......

Towards a cruise ship appearing on the horizon , how do we let it know we're here thought Allan, we need something big to wave, he turned to OH and said " off with the Bridget Jones " ........

OH jumped in between them like a woman on a mission. At that point the crab decided to latch onto OH....Allan knew he should rescue her but he just felt more drawn towards....