General Chat

Oh gawd some of us don't and can't be bothered to Google :-D

dear readers we all know what happened next poor Allan caught his foot in the net and ended up eating a mouthful of grass (lawn tennis I hope??). As he brushed himself down a round of applause erupted from the crowd....wow thought Allan they love me...then he turned to see they were in fact cheering Brian as he bounded to Allan rescue.......

He wandered across the green, past the box hedges and into the Tennis Court.

Might as well have a quick knock up while I am here. Work up a sweat so that I look windswept and interesting.

Allan had attracted a great crowd outside the windows, and when he knocked the last ball over the net, he thought he would vault over it...…

(I know these Palaces too... ;-) ;-))

.. where she was getting completely lost and Brian busy with the Marquis of Granby (For goodness sakes! That's the pub at the Scilly Isles!!! :-|)

Allan found he had time on his hands so...…….

Oh. Doi have to?

Well the maze is at Hampton Court. If you leave by the front entrance and turn right you should end up in Kingston but if you turn left you end up at the Sicily Isles. A double round about. No idea why it is called that.

To continue:

Allan has sent his OH into the maze....

I'm sure it does....please tell...... :-S :-)

Brian thought he might as well nip into Kingston todo some shopping in the sales. But once again he got onto the wrong bus and ended up at the Scilly Isles - which is a whole different story.






(A little local knowledge works a treat here) ;-)

Really we're doing corny jokes now....oh Maze gotcha.....

Allan was in a very small group of people that truly understood the rules of cricket....something about being out to be in....so maybe a maze with OH wasn't such a bad idea so where was she.......and where was the suddenly oh so quiet Brian....

Oh Twickers thought Allan. I thought they said something else.

I hope there is a game on just don't tell the OH there is another Royal Palace in the area. Mind you her getting lost in the maze...…...

Nature intended it is then thought Allan as he struck his best Fabio pose hair all flowing in the breeze and nothing but pure cotton on....his tank top being a poly mix just wasn't good enough......
Now if any of you had more childish/gutter dwelling nature intended thoughts.........

get my portrait painted, but how to pose......in my tank top or as Nature intended....

Eel Pie Island.

They,d only gone and got on a bus going the wrong way.

Never mind, thought Allan I,ll still...

.....But where to buy these delicacies?

When in London, do what Londoners do and head off to the Pie and Mash shop.

So 'Brian' marched them out of the Tower, ordered them on to the top deck of a tourist bus, - open top of course and they headed off, much to the delight of a group of foreign tourists,who thought this charade was part of the entertainment.

They passed many famous landmarks, with much camera clicking and then reached.......

"With her tendencies for visiting the bathroom to use the white telephone......jellied eels.....are you mad?"....yelled Allan...."Me, on the other hand, would love it"...he said as he jumped into Brian arms pushing OH to the side....

"Pork Pie" boomed the blessed Brian.

"What this young lady needs is a plate of Pie and Mash with Green gravy with Jellied Eels for starters."

"Now come on my dear woman you know you want a nice pork pie and a pint so let's get going sweetie"......as it turns out might not have been the wisest thing for Allan to say right then......so he did of course......and.....

Allan wondered just what OH had been telling this Brian lookalike.

Surely she wouldn't have had time to list ALL his failings. No, it must be those most fresh in her mind, which irked the most.

Somewhat intimidated by the foghorn voice, Allan tried to plead that he had had really good intentions, when they'd set off, but fate had overtaken them and OH had perhaps not been happy at how things turned out.
Allan decided now was not the time to list any of OH's own short comings because he didn't think Beefy Brian would listen.

OH seemed to be enjoying having the upper hand and followed demurely when 'Brian' suggested they go to get something to eat. He led her away to the staff private quarters. Meanwhile Allan was left wondering on his own next move.

Should he leave OH to be treated like royalty or insist she come with him on his pork pie mission?

Brian Blessed no less

and like Brian he had a booming voice...."Allan what's this hear you're not treating this sweet woman like a Queen....why not?"


He actually made the walls shake.....

In the arms of a beefy Beefeater who bore an uncanny resemblance to

Allan suddenly remembered that in a previous life he had indeed been a beefeater hence the uniform felt so normal...anyways....the beefeater hands were full of coconuts....and he was explaining to the nice young lady who it wasn't safe to be here at night time....Allan snug by while he was busy....and found OH........

It seemed to Allan that another personality had taken up residence in his head.

This was the only explanation as to why he knew his way around the Tower of London.

Although passing through London whilst travelling to Ash Vale, he had only once visited the Capital, spending a day there, but not to do the tourist thing.

Of course another explanation could be that there was a guiding spirit helping him, but the only spirits he was aware of were those imprisoned in glass containers until he decided to release them.

Still, to look on the bright side, at least he knew where his wife was and he was very tempted to leave her there.