General Chat

Allan, who would rather chew his own arms off rather than eat pizza, hoped that the good Captain might at least have some finger food of the fish variety.

He (Allan) was also getting a bit frustrated with messing about on boats. He certainly did not share the Water Rat's view of them as Allan preferred to arrive at a destination; in his case Fremantle, Western Australia, from where it was but two train rides, and the flash of a pass (seniors free travel card) to Bunbury

They followed the smell of pizza coming from the hut and hoped captain Birdseye would be willing to share a slice and a boat

Caerphilly they looked around the area until they saw what looked like a fisherman's hut, - well at least it was tall and covered with large-mesh nets.

Would they find a chap to lend them a boat, or would they just have to flounder around until their luck changed?

They tramped over the shingle towards the hut.

Allan took the two fishes out of his ears, which he had been using (the fish, not his ears) as herring aids.

Both he and his wife were beginning to flounder and felt as though they were mere prawns in a larger game of celestial chess.

Yesterday they were cheesed off, now they were chessed off.

Having not satisfied his craving for cheese Allan was developing a craving for a bit of Dover sole

Allan did not even question why he was back in Somerset, he just was!

Somerset, south coat of England, surely there must be sea around. If there was sea, then there must be boats. If there were boats, then they could sail.

Never say die! They headed for the coast.....





again!

Cheddar and gorge.

They are back in England :-D

Allan decided to write about his trials and tribulations.

Thus he commenced, 'Once upun a time ( ;-))…..'

His OH however was beginning to feel a bit cheesed off, quite blue in fact.

Hard cheese, thought Allan, displaying that lack of sympathy and empathy for which he was well known within the family circle.

Now, if only he could find a nice bit of Cheddar he could really gorge himself.

Allan needed a drink with his cheese, so he found a small stream and had a pint of beer.

That was a Steinbeck.

Did he have a copy of mice and men?

Allan of course held this knowledge as he was very fond of cheese and the more he thought of it the more he wanted it!

So OH copious bag had neither cheese nor mouse trap.....what to do....he deserved some cheese after all he'd been Gouda for at least five mins....

'I know there has been a Mousetrap in the West End for over 50 years' said Allan, but that is a mystery in itself.

OH was amazed, how did Allan have this mine of information?

... not to worry, sad his OH. I,m sure there is mousetrap in there........

Well OH bag was known to be copious if nothing else :-)

Seeing all these mice right there, made Allan hanker after some cheese surely he could find something to nibble on....

It would have to have been to run up his wife's leg!

However, she is made of stern stuff and taking a carving knife swiftly cut of it's tail.

The actual deed was recorded by Chaucer (who was in his cups) in the section of his epic poem, known as the Mouse's Tale

Whilst this might seem to be an anachronism, OH's bag seems to be very Tardis like on occasions.

....it was one of three visually impaired mice.

Their little clogs did indeed make a racket! (Thank goodness we know what we are talking about!!) :-D

OH took one look at the rodents and let out one mighty shriek. Unfortunately that made them scatter, and one ran up OH's leg....

At first, he couldn't work out where they were, but then OH noticed the mice and said, "There they are, there on the stair right there.........."

and sure enough they were and not only that, they were dancing too and making a terrific racket on the wooden stairs.

Carefully tip toeing through them, so as not to crush the blooms. Allan headed for the windmill in the distance.

On arriving, he opened the door to hear mice singing......

All this talking in tongues was too much for Allan....he looked into OH copious bag and found his ruby shoes. Putting them clicking his heels and said "I wish I was anywhere but here".....with a flash of lightning Allan found he was suddenly in the Netherlands knee deep in Tulips.