General Chat

:-D :-D

It seems before he does anything else Allan needed a Dickanary or to go to another thread :-D

Allan looked for the nearest book store...but no one seemed to know what that was....does no one read these days....

Allan look up and down the street, and yes indeed, there was that famous chain of book shops LiquidPebbles.

'Ah ha!' though Allan 'I shall have a saunter around the black bookshelves to see if I can find inspiration for my next plan. I am starting to get homesick, I have no fresh clothes, and I am getting hungry again. Perhaps I can find something on the shelf labelled Travel.'

Allan spied a book entitled Lonely Planet 'Nothing like stating the obvious' thought Allan.

Allan selected the section entitled The Antipodes, and stifled a sob...…..

.. at all the pretty pictures of

Ants.

Was he recalling that termite hill that was an itchy memory earlier on in his travels?

Oh.... there's a book on architecture

'Explore the Archipelago'.... That should be a safe read.

"...Oh look...Bermuda I've always wanted to go there and so does OH wonder where she is??"......as if by magic who should stumble past the shop window right then...none other than.....

Archie Peligough and OH. Allan stumbled to the door of the bookshop and called to them. They turned.

'Oh man up Allan.' snorted Archie, don't tell me you have a bit of dirt in your eye, I wont believe it. You were the same when you feel into that termite hill. Then tried to pretend you were Gregory Peck in that filum.

'I have made a decision you two. We are heading south-east!' Allan retorted, and stormed off in a huff, what could possibly go wrong?

Oh good. Thought Allan’s OH. Much as I fancied going to Bermuda I didn’t,t want to end up in that triangle thing. Strange things happen there.

Or maybe Allan doesn't know his East from his West...well he spends so long upside down it gets confusing...and he still did want to go to Bermuda....and maybe the triangle wouldn't show it's face in his travel tales....or maybe it will.... :-D ;-)

Poor Allan. He might get carted off in a padded wagon.

He is so confused that even his alternate personalities are not sure where he is.
;-)

Well, he hadn't the shorts to go to Bermuda and the only triangle he had known was the one belonging to the school band.

Mind you it was very suspicious that all the band instruments were placed in a cupboard after one day's performance and the following day only the triangle was to be found, looking very smug and somehow more rounded, giving off the occasional belch.

By now, Allan could fully empathise with these lyrics:

He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody

Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?

Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command

He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere Man can you see me at all?

Nowhere Man, don't worry
Take your time, don't hurry
Leave it all till somebody else lends you a hand

Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?

Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command

He's a real Nowhere Man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody

Fear not because just as all seemed to be lost......

Allan decided to make a decision as already noted....

On storming off in a huff OH saw him in a different light and liked what she saw.

Before you could say

" Funny, reely," he said. "You spend your whole life goin' to school and learnin' stuff, and they never tell you about stuff like the Bermuda Triangle and UFOs and all these Old Masters running around the inside of the Earth. Why do we have to learn boring stuff when there's all this brilliant stuff we could be learnin', that's what I want to know."
(Terry Pratchett)

Allan and OH were on a cruise ship already sailing to Bermuda. She liked this new Allan and didn't question where all the new clothes came from nor how Allan was affording it all.

But then just as they were almost at the Island........

Allan jumped overboard

forgetting he couldn't swim :-P :-D

He can swim, not very well, but that doesn't matter.

Allan had, in fact, arranged with the submarine skipper from umpteen pages ago to rendezvous with him at these precise co-ordinates :-P

Allan was treading water with a lifebuoy ring around his middle. He imagined he looked a little like Leonardo de Caprio. The wet shirt could also be attributed to a certain Mr Darcy.


Allan heard a familiar whoop whoop sound of the submarine horn as it began to surface. Allan was tossed around in the sea as it came to the top of the water.


The lid popped up, and the captain appeared, bearing a striking resemblance to Sean Connery......

Allan was now worried...he'd seen the movie many years ago The hunt for Red October...yes the sub got to America safely...in the end... but he wasn't sure his and OH stomachs could put up with evasive action should it be required.....

But nothing will go wrong will it if they go aboard......

Allan and OH decided it would be prudent to board the sub. Down they went, OH was pleased she was wearing trousers.

It was gloomy inside the sub, with lots of knobs and dials.

'Crikey, this looks like a set from a 50's filum,' thought Allan. 'I am expecting to see Johnny Mills, Dickie Attenborough and Bryan Forbes.'

Suddenly the lights began to flash, a siren wailed, and the tannoy repeated
'Dive, dive, dive'...…….

By eco, thought Allan, I hope someone remembered to close the hatch!

Fortunately someone had done so, ...it's the training , you know.

Their quick descent did nothing for their physical well-being and OH started to look very queasy.

"Oh no", said Allan, remembering her delicate digestive system."We haven't got that to contend with in a confined space, have we?"

It wasn't long before the rapid descent eased to a more gentle pace and OH's face took on a more natural colour.

Allan meanwhile............

was standing behind one of the sailors watching him studying the sonar, twiddling knobs and being very efficient.

One red button caught Allan's eye (and threw it back) it literally winked at Allan, daring him to press it.

'What is this one for?' Allan could resist no more. His finger was itching to press the button.

Naval Rating No 1, looked aghast. 'Never, ever press that button....'

Could Allan resist?