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Oh for a big burly trawler man from Grimsby woed Allan.he cod put everything right.




:-D

:-D

Allan could see that his wife was trying to shout something to him, but it was all a little indistinct.

He immediately put his hand in the water, caught a fish and stuck it in his ear.

That's better, thought Allan, adjusting his new herring aid :-P :-D

:-D :-D

Now Allan could hear her screeching clearly, a fact he regretted immediately.

What was she screeching about a well, wasn't there enough water here already.....

Suddenly it got very dark.....and he felt claustrophobic for some reason....

"This is not the plaice to be.". he thought, but what to do? How could he get OH away so that they could continue their travels?

Looking around, Allan noticed a possible opportunity, there on the horizon was...........

Zaphod Beeblebrox

Allan kept looking for an answer hoping it wasn’t,...
42

But of course it wasn't there were no dolphins and he hadn't technically hitchhiked...no he was in a Whale so that's what OH was screeching.....

On the horizon were the Whales lips! Allan needed more light so he lit a match....didn't do much good...then as luck would have it he found an old fashioned torch which he lit....it made a lot of stinky smoke which irritated the Whale no end.....spitting him out Allan caught up in a wave managed to grab OH who was waiting frantically outside...they rode off on the crest of the wave until......

they reached a Scouts' Jamboree, where everyone was singing, or mutilating, that good old scout song. " We're Riding Along on the Crest of a Wave"

That was also the anthem for hordes of surfers in Margaret River, and Allan knew that he and his wife were finally back home in WA

So as everyone knows as soon as you get home from a holiday you feel like you need a holiday......so OH opened the computer at 50 fun trips you should take before you get too old to remember them and what should be first on the list but..............

Poor Allan. There he was, thinking he was safely back home - able to get on with -- whatever he gets on with!

Oh you don't want to know it involves rolled up trousers legs and winking....

anyway first on the list was feel good send a friend on an adventure of a lifetime....now who to send thought Allan.........

He was certain that Rick would enjoy being the first person on Mars. He could set up the tents for the rest of the intrepid space travellers arrived a few years later.

Allan immediately contacted NASA and then went to enjoy many of the liquid fruits of Margaret River.

At least he was only ninety kilometres from home.

Ooooo. A lot can happen in 90 kilometres. Especially if you,be been imbibing in Margaret river water.

It did occur to Allan in one of his more lucid moments that Rick hadn't actually yet set off on his journey, just that his name had been put forward.

Surely there would be no hitch would there?

In the meantime Allan made merry.

and if Allan makes Merry then everyone knows all about it...in fact it was all across the front page the next day no less.
Allan started a Gufundme to raise the money to pay for Rick trip, and generously added $5 to start it all off.
To everyone surprise after only 12 hours they'd raised.......

$5.00 plus a few comments such as "Why should we pay for your vivid imagination?" and "Why does Rick always bounce back?"

It was obvious to Allan that of all his daft ideas perhaps this one was the daftest.

He headed, in rather an erratic way, to the next winery to ponder on what to do now.

His head was full of thoughts, but which were his own? He had no way of telling but his were definitely in the minority

As the crowd funding hadn’t worked Allan refunded himself the $5. Now he could afford a black coffee whilst he worked out what .......

That weird noise and smell were.........

It seemed to be coming from the direction of the clump of trees near the river.

It didn't smell very pleasant...or natural.. Had someone started a home-brew enterprise or perhaps they were trying out a new aerosol.?

What was it?

They were Coolibah trees and a Old Timer was washing his unmentionables in the billabong.

He told Allan..........