General Chat

Pat rishhh aaaaaaaaaa, no that it not a suitable item of clothing for a woman of your age to go out in. Put it back at once, it's FTEs favourite dress.


Tutting like mad and a little flustered looking for the missing lamp.

Teresa :-|

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ to Susan !

Ah what would we do without the hypocracies of council policies to keep us on our toes. I had a fight with the county council highways authority a couple of years back.

Many moons ago, we paid the local council a large sum of money to create a runway from our frontyard to the blacktop, so we could drive in and out of our frontage with ease (people park by the kerb opposite, you see, which restricts manouvering, its not all that wide a street).

The highways authority came along and resurfaced the sidewalk, and in doing so "stole" some of our runway. MFH went into his usual "lets wait and see" lazybones mode. I went into my Lets Get Some Action mode. First I told the navvies where our runway should extend to. They said it was more than their job was worth to make any changes without permission from the highways authority.

I phoned the council, and explained the situation, and asked if they still had paperwork relating to our application. They didnt, but they did have a list of applications placed in date order, including ours, although it didnt show the finer details or what we had paid, and offered to send us the bit relevant to our home; and I said that will do nicely thank you.

Now - I had just discovered Google Maps, and had an image or two of the sidewalk outside our house, showing the extent of the runway.

I then phoned the highways authority, who told me to phone the council. I told them I had already phoned the council, who were sending me paperwork to prove we had paid for a runway which was now considerably shorter due to the resurfacing works, furthermore I had photographic evidence of what we had paid for, and I demanded that the surveyor or whoever was responsible for this come to visit me because I wanted my runway back.

The guy turned up a couple of hours later, looked at my photos, looked at the sidewalk, and told the navvie "do what the lady says".

I guess its neither practical nor affordable for you to switch to oil fired or gas fired central heating? Now, in the UK, both gas and electric systems are very expensive to run and too many people have to make the decision to Eat or Heat, but I remember a time when gas fired was cheaper. We have a gas fired central heating system which provides the hot water, but I wont cook with gas, I have an electric oven.

CC

*still sulking, with pouting lips and downcast eyes*

And another Blooooberriiieee call. I suspect Mrs Berry has been telling tales behind my back but dear Petunia had the grace to phone again to make excuses about her tirade .... errr ..... to say she was only teasing me, so I suppose thats all right then.

Petunia ignores people she doesnt like - I stick pins into effigies of them!!! ;-) :-D *cackles quietly*

I was most concerned to learn that Pat rish aaaah has now become a Flower Child. I thought that this fad went out of style with the demise of the Hippies and the flower-painted Volksvagens, but its true that what goes around comes around. For example, I have a photograph of my mother holding me as a baby, and the style of skirt Mama was wearing was once again In Vogue in the 1970s ..... I know, because I purchased one. In the original photograph one can hardly see anything, as the photo is about one inch by one inch. However, I have Photosuite and I know how to use it !!! I scanned that ancient photograph, ran it through Photosuite and enlarged and cleaned the image, and hey presto, all the finer details were revealed..

There was another ancient photograph, of my dear Parents, standing in the street outside our family home. Mama was expecting me at the time, so there were really three people in that marriage. Anyway, two other people (a maternal aunt and her husband) can be seen in the background, standing in the doorway of our house. This picture too was put through the magical influence of Photosuite, and Abracadabra Alacazam, a third person was revealed standing there, a small girl, who is my stepcousin and came with my aunt and uncle (she was niece to the uncle).

The reason she was my stepcousin, is because when Aunt married Uncle, widowed GrandMama met widowed father of the Groom, and they got married. Ergo, Mama's new brother in law become her stepbrother. And if one wishes to take it a STEP further (pun intended) .... this meant that Uncle and Aunt were not just husband and wife, they became step brother and step sister - which made Mama a Sister in Law to her Sister who was the wife of Mama's Step Brother.

This is where I start singing ..... "I'm My Own Grandpaw". Which version would you like - Ray Stevens, or Phil Harris??

But I digress. I really cannot envisage Pat rish aaah leaping around wicker baskets hanging over fires, but am now concerned she may return home with a tribe of long haired young men whose main conversational topics are beer and Karma bells, interspersed with Yeah Man. Only time will tell .....

*prepares oneself for the next Bloooberrriiieee call*
CC

Hello Petunia,

I was wondering how you went on with the Ouzo :-D..... Perhaps you are made of stern stuff and it didn't affect you?

Ooh, lovely Spanish dancing, even their horses can dance ;-). Do have fun, hope you have a suitable swishy skirt to dance in? If not, buy one.

It is a very heavy frost here this morning but the sun is shining brightly so that makes a welcome change... I am back to my thermals. :-|.

I am going to wag work this afternoon and accompany my fruit on a jaunt out of town. Hooray :-).

Our local council is trying to outlaw certain types of woodburners.... Yep, I think ours is one of them. I shall not go cold without a fight though. They gave us a ruddy permit in the first place, some years ago mind. But still, we are not amused..

I had better get my skates on and get to work on time if I am to make an early get away. Lucky for me I am good terms with the boss ;-).

Toodle

Susan

#soft coaxing voice#

Cherry.....................Cherry dear.....................Can you hear me dear? Come, come dear, you know I was only chiding you in jest.

One knows if someone truly likes them if they josh with them. If you do not like that person..............you ignore them.

Come on dear, talk to Auntie Petunia, come on, I'll send you something nice, come on, be a pal....................

I trust you and Mrs Berry are in a perfect partnership dear, she makes the cakes and pies, and you give them the benefit of your tasting. Phew, that was tactful!!!!

One has had a missive informing me of Pat-trish-aaaaah, telling me that she has come a Flower Child. Oh dear, oh dear. One has visions of the Wicker Man when those lithesome young lasses were leaping over the flames................or worse still dancing like Brick Teckland in the bedroom. Shudders.

No news of Ruby and Smarmie so hopefully they have departed back to Uncle Sam.

We are all at sea again, and heading back to Espana. I can just imagine the fiery Latino's with their coal black hair, flashing eyes, and snake hips. And that is only the ladies! I cannot wait to have a clack of their castinets.

Ole
Auntie Petunia

As I told dear Petunia, I really resent being accused of not paying attention to Pat rish aaaaah, and as for the accusation that I fawned all over Ruby and her husband ..... well !!! I hardly call it fawning, to point them in the direction of the local Estate Agent, Holmes & Ruwin. When Petunia gets home I shall have a few words to say. And it wont be .... "did you have a nice holiday dear?"

Anyway I dont have to ask if she had a nice holiday. She keeps calling us from her Bloooberrrrieeee and telling us all about it "as she goes".

If Pat rish aaaah rubbed that lamp and coereced that geni into taking her to Teresa's home in order to attend the Wild Flower Festival, its hardly my fault.

off now to fawn over Mrs Berry ..... at least someone appreciates me.

*sniffing*
CC

Myyyyyy gooooodness! Did I every have any idea that there were so many ruins in Greece? No, I did not!!!

We must have covered every square inch of the mainland, and then we caught the ferry over to Cyprus. Oh how pretty! The little white cottages, and the pretty red flowers in the gardens.

We wandered into one of the towns, and sat and had tea [no milk!] and watched the world go by. We then visited the local shops and bought more trinklets to bring home. I have bought you all 'worry beads', so if you feel any sort of stress, just jangle them and count them around. Sending them down the cyber hatch...................NOW. Oooops sorry Cherry!

Now I am a little worried that Pat-trish-aaaaah has gone AWOL and you did not tell me Cherry. She is my own flesh and blood after all. If you paid as much attention to dear Pat-trish-aaaaah as you have been rubbing lamps and fawning around Ruby and Smarmie, we might get somewhere.

You know how easily led she is, and now that she is off with dear Teresa's fruits on the festival trail, I know it will end in tears! Remember the last time? Bovver boots, skinny minis and shaved heads with tattooos? Did I not tell you to keep her on a short leash?

Teresa dear, I hope you good works are not in the home for Fallen Women? If it is dear, then make sure you pick them up. Titters into a lace edged hankerchief.

We will be heading back to the Ship later on this evening, where there is to be a Magic show with a very well know, miniscule magician. We are told we will like it, but not a lot!! How do they know that? We may like it a great deal. I do so dislike presumptious people.

I wonder if I can get Beatrice up on stage to be sawn in half? She really is turning out to be a right 'know all'.................

We are going to purchase local delicacies before we head back, we are having some heavenly honey soaked cakes, and bottles of the local cordial. I think it is called Ouzo.......................

Pip Pip
Auntie Petunia

Haloooo where are you all. I'm orff to do good works but will be back :-D

must say .. I did enjoy The Scapegoat, screened last night. What a brilliant story, and what a nice ending.

I vaguely recall seeing a movie many years ago where a young married man had a doppelganger who was quaaiiite psychotic, and the doppel wanted the young man's life and wife. Eventually there was a fight between them and I never did work out if it was the nice husband or his evil counterpart who won.

I have a double somewhere. She was seen drinking in a pub on a night when I was at home with MFH, so I know it wasnt me.

CC

I am sooooo sorry Petunia dear, I seem to have used up the three wishes that came with the genie and the lamp, but I didnt mean to do it on purpose. You know how accident prone I can be.

Perhaps I should get Pat rish aaaaaah to rub the lamp next, to see if the geni appears and does to her ... errrr....... does for her what it did for me. I must say it was quite an experience to materialise in Teresa's kitchen and see all the work in progress. Well, you know what "they say" about if you want something done then ask a busy person acos these people are busy getting everything done.

PAT RISH AAAAH !!! where are youuuu ????? oh dear she is no where to be seen. OMG - the lamp is missing too.

CC

The chook was a little underdone Auntie dear but we are all here to tell the tale ;-)


Teresa

Tutty tut :-S :-|

What is Pat ris haaaa doing in the spare room. She fell on top of the pile of stuff that FTE is taking on her journeys. What a mess that washing liquid has made :-| :-| :-| :-|

I suppose she is here for the extended leaving dos that Fruit has planned. Never mind. We will keep an eye on her this time, no raving at the local venues for P this time. I have many chores for P including a bit of clearing up in the spare room and getting her hands round the u bends.

Yours tutting

Teresa :-S

Oooooh my aching feet! I have walked and walked and walked!

We have been perusing the Acropolis, and got into a very heated discussion about some marbles. The young man said they should be returned, and I told him I havent played marbles since I was a young gel. I particular liked the milky coloured ones, I was a real dab hand as flicking them.

Oh Teresa dear, I was really disappointed to learn that you did not eat a real dinosaur. Never mind, I believe that birds were descended from dinosaurs, so you got there in a roundabout sort of way. I hope the chooook was cooked properly.

Susan dear, I think you have blown the rain clouds our way. I do believe it is starting to drizzle over Motie Towers.

Cherry dear, what the heck did you do that for? Please dear, I think there are only a certain amount of wishes to be gained from one lamp.

Oooooh a thought has occurred to me........................you could wish that you know who would disappear...............please dear......................just for me!

Pleading
Auntie Petunia

*looks around in bemusement*

well that takes care of my second wish I suppose ..... serves me right for wishing I'd had some of dear Teresa's cake*

how do I get back to Motie Towers, I wonder. I wish I knew.

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!! and there she was gone.

Ladies, the BBQ was a little lacking. Drink was flowing and very little else, not even a small dinosaur. I was driving and so you can only imagine what I had to deal with. The only sober ones of the party were FTY and I. I washed up, ferried various family members here and there, tutted and tutted some more and then............................................... ate a lot of the cake in desperation and hunger.

I will get FTE to bake a new batch of cake and will distribute them tomorrow.

I have no hangover today and have been at paid toil without the effects of the demon drink :0)

I did miss a very strange event ladies, one which happens only once in a blue moon. The devils football season has started and FTEs team played in all that heat and won, 8-2. Now make sure you have the smelling salts out for you must be as shocked as I was !

I am orff now to put out the washing as it is very warm still and it may get dry.

"Cherrrry what are you doing in my kitchen and how did you get there and who is that strange little man with you clutching a lamp. If your not careful my dear husband wil be flogging it on gumtree."

Yours feeling this day cannot get any more odd.

Teresa


~~~~~~ to Lesley who will be in the mosh pit waiting for Sir Tom as we speak :0)

hello Susan, I cannot begin to imagine how terrified plane passengers must be when severe weather conditions affect the flying. I hope everyone landed safely in the end. I dont like high winds blowing around the house, for the obvious reasons.

swap ya some of our heat, for some of your rain?

CC

ps I will indeed be careful what I wish for ...... because I might just get it.

CC,

I suggest you bring the little man 'around' immediately, a bit of grovelling on your part and you may still have two wishes... However, if the little man goes into a sulk. forget your wishes and bang him on the head once more.....

I wouldn't like to imagine what revenge the little man may bring upon your person....

Remember : be very careful what you wish for :-D.

Well we survived yesterdays elements, my word, the heavens did open and the wind tore through town like a madman ( or genie) on the loose...
Today the sun shone, for five minutes and now the sky has darkened again.
Wellington suffered very high winds yesterday, some flights were unable to land and were returned from where they had come from, passengers were screaming with fear :-D... Roll on Summer, please :-S.

Teresa, hope the BBQ was enjoyable. Like Petunia, I have never eaten dinosaur, though some of the offerings that come off our bbq could well have been a dinosaur in an earlier life... We don't tend to use our bbq very often, don't quite know why that is.

I have just taken a couple of chickens out of the freezer, and yes they were err, dead, when they went into said freezer.... Must say they don't look very appetising at the moment. Only that the packet was labelled 'chicken - corn fed', could I tell what they are, could be baby dinosaurs?

The rain is back :-|. My OH will not be able to attend to all the outdoor chores I have lined up for him. Never mind, I shall find him some indoor chores. Can't have him getting wet now can I... :-D

Better move myself and get on with the day. Enjoy your lovely sunshine, lucky ducks.

Susan

*groans*

oh dear, I do wish that dear Petunia had contacted me first to tell me not to rub that wretched lamp, before all those items came through the cyber hatch. The lamp was rather dull and I thought I would give it a good polish, so I got the yellow dusters and started rub-a-dub-dubbing ......... and suddenly a strange little man, wearing ancient Arabic robes and with a funny hat on his head, materialised out of thin air and offered me three wishes.

My immediate reaction was to respond with two little words, and he tried to, so I hit him on the head with the brass poker. Now I have a body on the Aubusson rug in front of the marble fireplace in the dining room.

I wish Petunia was here to advise me .................... *brightens up* ..... but I still have two wishes left :-D

CC

Good evening dear Ladies,

We are all at sea again. We left Turkey behind us and we are heading towards Greece.

Beatrice is getting out all the brochures, and we are being drilled on the attractions on the mainline.

As the Olympics are still very much uppermost in everyones mind, we are to visit Mount Olympus. I can picture it very well from Jason and the Argonauts. I wonder if we shall see Honor Blackman there.

No dancing for us tonight, nor bingo. We may be old biddies dear, but it bored us stupid. I fancy the entertainment tonight of a show. All those syncopated dances from leggy lasses and handsome young men. I wonder if they mingle when they are not dancing for their supper. Octavia snorted and sad something about chalk and cheese, but I cannot see what that has to do with the price of fish.

Do not worry Cherry dear, I shall take Pat-trish-aaaaah in hand when I return. Did you get the things I send down the hatch. Please unroll the hand knotted carpet and put it in my bedroom. The hubble bubble pipe can be left in the parlour as a 'talking point', the lamp too can be put on the sideboard. One word of caution dear, do not rub it....................I shall say no more. The various necklaces, I will sort out when I return home.

Dear Upsidedown Susan, I can sympathise with you and your wet weather, we usually have the same in England. But the heat here is unbearable, my parasol has not been down since we left Southampton. Please to hear puppy is bearing up. I am missing little Trickey, but she will be all the more pleased to see me when I collect her.

Teresa, I trust the BBQ went well. Tell me dear, what does dinosaur actually taste like? I have eaten the normal meats, including venison, but is the hide a little tough? I fear it would break my teeth. I still have my own dear, and would like to keep it that way.

Oooooh the lights are going down, and the leggy lovlies are high kicking their way across the stage. Yes indeed gels, Give them the Old Razzle Dazzle!

Humming merrily
Auntie Petunia

Hi Susan, please can you send some of your lashings of rain over here, I am getting very tired of having trek around with the hose pipe to keep my shrubs alive. But, please dont blame my hosepipe for your lashings of rain. Its not my water leaking through the planet, its to do with cloud formations over New Zealand.

For the last two days I have been visiting my favourite garden centre, buying colour packs, small potted plants, and garden ornaments. I have redone my hanging baskets, created two display tubs, overhauled a pot, and its all cost so much I dare not show My First Husband the till receipts. I spent so much money yesterday, that the checkout girl remembered me when I went again today! At least .... I hope that is why she remembered me, because the garden centre is very busy when they have one of their Discount Events. It was very tiring work but my new hip held out, and I am happy with the results. All I have to do now is ..... keep it all alive in this heat. When I had finished getting my fingers dirty, I went back in the house and collapsed with a sigh of relief on to the sofa. One's First Husband stood up and without any hints on the part of myself, offered to make me a cup of tea.

Oh my word. Your cheesecake sounds like Heaven On A Plate. Instead of eggs and cream, try lemon curd (spread over the crushed biscuit base) and Total 0% yogurt with blueberries mixed into the yogurt. Chill well, cut into slices, and eat !!!

Now, I had no idea bingo was for old ladies. That must be why I dont play it. I always thought I didnt play because I cannot afford to risk my food budget. Our local council holds tea dances for pensioners. I dont attend those either. I'm the kind of OAP who is growing old disgracefully - its much more fun :-D And, it annoys my Oldest Offspring.

Glad to learn the puppy is ok now. Our part time House Cat came in this morning, gave herself a bath on my bed, and left a bloodstain behind; she keeps chewing at her paw and I think a dewie claw is bothering her. But can we catch her to check it ??????? answers on a post card please.

CC