General Chat

I hang on your every word Petunia dear. It wasnt my fault you didnt wait for me to return to the WI meeting to tuk-tuk you back home again. Mind you my poor feet and ankles needed a rest from all that pedalling, look at me, feet and legs like elephants trunks. But, it was a very long walk for me as I had not taken my handbag and had no money for the fare back to Motie Towers.

My little Whimsies are not scratchy and have been removed.

I am afraid that I was not impressed by any of those WI ladies. They all seemed rather cliquey, and when you visited the Little Girls Room they were rather ... ahem .... "chatty" about you. Not that I would repeat what was said, I am too much of a lady, which is why I much prefer your delightful bone china tea service to earthenware. Dont worry about the Jammy Bodgers, dear, or Nice Rich Tea bikkies. Try one of these All Butter Shortbreads, they are sooo Melt In The Mouth you will wonder how you ever lived without them.

As for the WI Calendar - I hope Mrs Bateson, Mrs Farquarson, and Mrs Hibbert, all have the sense to put a huge sunflower in front of their faces, one would not wish the camera lens to crack!!

CC

21st Century Fox
or ... Fox Tails
or ... Mrs Dale's Diatribe

I believe the date was Friday 11th June - but don’t ask me which year because I wasn’t watching the North Star (or the Space Station) that night. We foxes do not set much store by numbers or dates. In our world, the moon rises and sets, and the sun rises and sets. We eat, or we go hungry; and the two legged creatures come and go around us.

On that Friday in June, there I was sitting in a garden enjoying the sunshine, when a Two Legs saw me from behind the glass panel that separates her world from my world. She rapped on the glass and I glanced her way but ignored her. Then she opened a door and stepped out into my world. I was gone in a flash, over a fence, to somewhere more peaceful.

We used to live in the open countryside but the Two Legs encroached into our territory, first with traps and guns, and creatures with two heads and six legs and a tail. One head would shout TALLYHO ! and the other head would reply with a NEIGH. We were chased by hunting dogs, until there was nowhere left to run. Secondly, the Two Legs began to build dwellings all over the countryside, and they called these areas Suburbia.

Some of us packed our bags and moved into Suburbia, denning in parks and untended rear gardens. We learned quickly that food in Suburbia is easier to scavenge for. We foxes dine well in suburbia. There are always small rodents to catch and sometimes a plump pigeon. But best of all is the High Street where the many varieties of Two Legs go to dwellings called The Take Away. The Two Legs drop their Take Away everywhere, and we snack on pizza, or Chinese, or Indian, or Fish n Chips.

We are also very proficient at knocking the lids off dustbins, or ripping open bin bags, for food scraps. That always gets the Two Legs hopping, so we do it even more, although the pickings are not as good as they are along the High Street. Our country cousins are still raiding the chicken coops and pigeon lofts. This gives us Townies a bad name.

The garden I was sunbathing in, on that Friday, is not untended, but I like to visit it anyway. I can move faster than the Two Legs who lives in the dwelling attached to that garden.

The following Sunday, I was minding my own business, perching on a shed roof, when a crow began dive-bombing me. It made several passes over my head (it must have thought it was a silly Fokker). I yapped a warning to the crow, but decided to leap over the fence and into the garden of the Two Legs who had disturbed me on the Friday. Again, she chased me off - but I have my escape routes so I won the race.

On 23rd June, dawn had just broken when I followed my usual garden route. Normally the unwelcoming Two Legs is not around at that time, and I have great fun knocking over her garden gnomes, leaving my huge paw prints all over her precious gravel path that she likes to keep smoothed, and scuffing up the slate chips. It’s good exercise for the Two Legs to smooth my disturbances down. I also rampage through her shrubs, breaking twigs off. We never know when we might need to chew on a twig to sharpen our teeth. I look at it this way - my activities are my exercise. And, cleaning up after me gives the Two Legs plenty of exercise and lots of fresh air.

But I digress …..21st June. Yes, as I padded along I was amazed to be disturbed by the female Two Legs who was sitting on a chair at the open back door, which is normally locked at 4.15 in the morning. She jumped up from the chair and hollered at me, and clapped her hands, and I vaulted over the fence. I should have won a gold medal for that leap. I tried visiting the garden again in the evening but she saw me. I will not be deterred and if Two Legs keeps chasing me off I will leave some unpleasant little parcels for her to clean up on a regular basis, and scent-mark all over the place. That will teach her whose garden it is. I’ve already deposited a few free samples on her gravel path. It was very popular with the flies!!

I hear that some Suburbia foxes have tamed some carefully selected Two Legs and get given three meals a day. I would have said “three square meals” but the dog food is served in round bowls. I am determined to wear my Two Legs out, until she starts feeling sorry for me, and stops chasing me away. As a species, we have survived for a very long time, and we will outlive and outfox the Two Legs.

When we foxes were hunted down, long ago before the Royal Society for the Protection of Animals came into existence, our paws and tails were cut off for souvenirs. Sometimes, our tails were used to trim hats.

I have learned that the Alpha Female of all the Two Legs is called The Queen, and she is mated with a Duck (from Edinburgh), who thinks he is the Two Legs Alpha Male. One day the Queen was going on an Official Visit and asked the Duck what hat she should wear for the occasion. The Duck wanted to know where the Queen was going. “To [insert town of your choice]”, she replied. The Duck said “[town of choice]? Wear the fox hat”.

You are correct in your thinking Auntie Petunia tis the London Hospital that receives royalties from Peter Pan :-) it isn't so much the red mark that is a concern but the speed and size of the growth the small strawberry/beauty spot has grown, it has now reached E's bottom eyelid :-(

Removal of ones liberty bodice in January in the UK might not be a very good idea CC ;-) would you reconsider your choice of month you could maybe opt for flaming June :-)
I am a two legged creature that would chase a fox out my garden, not that I have ever seen a fox in my garden but often see where they have left there calling card on my gravel :-|

I hope you have time for some retail therapy Susan and that you find your perfect MOB outfit :-)

~~~~~~~~~~~~Hello Teresa

hi Lesley, to be honest, foxes have a bad press. I know they can be a pest in the countryside, killing chickens etc, but they have to eat, just like any of us. If it wasnt for the scenting and fouling, I wouldnt chase them out of my garden.

Hoho, liberty bodices. Mama bought me one when they first appeared - and I promptly developed pneumonia. Unfortunately, flaming June, scorching July and steamy August, are the months when I have to cover up, not divest. I dont tan - I burn.

CC

Oh dear, we have woken to a beastly day, a short sharp storm is to pass by today... I do feel for the bride at the venue today...

CC, Large sunflowers in front of faces, what the 'eck will the ladies in question use to cover their, err, lady bits? Larger sunflowers? I must admit, I did enjoy the movie, very funny indeed.

I think there is a local WI group here where I live, though I shant be joining. I have no wish to get me jugs out....

Last night, as my OH arrived home from work, we happened to catch a segment on a travel channel about the New Forest and the Beaulieu River. We visited Beaulieu in May, as OH's grandfather left from there(1897) for NZ with his family, we also drove through some of the forest area.... Lovely to catch the segment. We had a devil of a job finding Ginn's Farm where the family lived. Find it we did, though I think we went down a private driveway :-D.

My youngest sister arrives home today from a three week visit to the UK. As I only received one email in that time, I will presume everything went well. :-)

I had better get me skates on and ready myself for todays outing. Fruit went out last night so I hope she has woken in a perky mood :-S..

Have a pleasant weekend, keep warm and safe.

toodle pip

Susan

Petunia, I quite like the sound of the fancy pudding :-)

Oh my aching eyes!!!!!! Your recollections of Foxes was fascinating Cherry, but the print has gone awful small on this site dear, and I was squinting to read the words.

As you know there a family of foxes in the back garden during the Summer. Mama Fox had 4 little cubs, and they used to lay on the top of the shed, warming in the sun. A few of the kitties went walkabout when they were exploring. I tend to think they just kept out of the way.................come September they had all gone. One also needs to make sure the lids are on the dustbins, or else the contents of the black bins are strewn all over the pavements. One does not want the World and his Wife to see that one eats from M & S, F & M, and Harolds!!!!!

Now Cherry dear, have you been making the sachets for the sensory herbs and spices as I asked you dear? I left a yard of Liberty cotton for the purpose, arranged over the top of the Singer. Is it the treadle that is flummoxing you dear? It is quite simple dear, put your feet on the plate and push, then retract, and push, then retract. Imagine you are pulling a tooth dear!

Lesley dear, I suspected it was the Peter Pan Hospital. I visited that hospital myself as a child. I too had a little mark, on my arm. Mama was reassured it would fade as I grew, and it did.

Liberty bodices are a wonder dear. I always wear one from September to the end of March. Not the same one of course. I have three, one to wear, one in the wash and one spare. Mine are the type that is pulled over the head, not the one with rubber buttons. I believe they perish in the wash. I must keep my kiddlies warm dears. It makes sense.

Oooooh dear Upsidedown Susan, how very exciting. You must be getting things organised and ordered by now. How warm will it be when you are MOB? Will you be in a light wool, or chiffon? I hope you will copy our dear Kate and wear nude heels. It elongates the legs, and matches any colour you might like to wear. I should have like to meet your skin and blister dear, did you not suggest that she came aknocking on the door of Motie Towers? She could have had afternoon tea with us. In fine bone china, witha gipsy cream to follow.

By the by, maybe the said puds could be ordered over the tinternet. On the official site of course, not inflated prices on Hebay.

Good night dears, I am having an early night as it has been such a hectic week.

Climbing into bed, puffing my pillows, candle out.

Auntie Petunia

Petunia dear, I will have you know that Papa had a Singer Sewing Machine, treadle operated, so I am not unfamiliar with the machine. However - actually using one successfully is another matter entirely. My two left feet do not comprehend synchronicity. I did not inherit Papa's tailoring skills, so there will be no pedal to the metal on the Singer tonight..

Why make the sachets - they can be bought on H'Amazon, nice little lavender ones, fully fragrant, and Post Free. I have ordered you two large packs. Think of all the time and effort I have saved.

Oddly enough I have just been perusing HeBay, idly looking at brown glass Pyrex casserole dishes of yesteryear, and Carltonware. The Pyrex dishes can be sent from the USA, for a small fortune in postage, and the Carltonware pieces I was interested in are owned by a company in New Zealand ....... but I was able to get two Nick Pope books (hardcover), now out of print, from H'Amazon.

There is a story to tell, as to why I am interested in these items. One gave one's Offspring some things for posterity and she decided she didnt want them so gave them away, instead of giving them back to me. My philosophy is : what is in the family, stays in the family. Alas I shall never see the Carltonware again and it was a family heirloom. To say one is heartbroken, would be an understatement. There were also some old 45s, but one was able to buy these back from the charity shop. However, everything else has long gone, but I feel obliged to replace them where I can; excluding the casserole dishes, and the Carltonware, which shall remain in America and New Zealand, respectively.

I think I too shall be shy and retiring and settle for an early night - as soon as I've tidied the kitchen and warmed some milk. sweet dreams to all,
CC

Thank you for the laugh Susan.

:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D
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Good Early Evening dears.

What a lovely day it has been. Bright, if a little chilly, but the sun shone bravely through the clouds.

We have been to Kenwood today dears. It truly is Autumn, and the leaves are falling from the trees. Various shades of green, yellow, orange and red. As you know I am an accomplished artist, and I did indeed take my water colours with me.

There now........................what do you think? A good likeness of the Iveagh Bequest? I think so. Since it has had its facelift, it really is like new. I think I saw some of the fairies that Cherry was talking about. I definitely think I felt people or fairies, looking over my shoulder as I was painting. And when I looked around, there was no-one there.

The gels and I decided to get a bit of air, and all went up there in Georges' car. Octavia and Georgianna went for a look around the House, I painted, and Beatrice [who seems to latch herself onto us at every occasion] went snapping with her camera. It really does have so many knobs and dials. I have my own little digitalis, but this has a great lens that she attaches and snaps away. She seems to find most of her subjects in the bushes. I cannot imagine what she finds there, slugs? Anyway, every time she emerged from the bushes, she declared That Will Do For the Sun. Whatever can she mean? We could see the sun, and she was in the shade........................

Now Susan, something I did not ask you about, what with you becoming MOB in the forseeable future. Why would you be getting your jugs out? Will you not be having caterers at the Do? Will they not be supplying the chinaware. If you are doing self catering dear, I can offer you a couple of cow-creamers for the dessert. Perhaps you mean water jugs for those who are tee-total. #delicately scratches head#

Now Cherry dear, I am sorry dear, but I think you have missed the point of the chiffon purses. It now seems I am to take possession of lavender sachets. Empty out the lavender, wash them, or at least get Pat-trish-aaaah to wash them, and then fill them with the herbs and spices!!!!!! As you have tailoring skills dear......................use them!

Lesley, I do hope you have recovered from your attack of the giggles dear, remember at our age dear, the tears run down our legs!

Orft to watch that lovely dancing show that is on soon.

Sings. Waltzing, waltzing High In the Clouds.................

Auntie Petunia

good evening all. I collected MFH this morning, so he could drive me to Harlow and other places. We had errands to run, and shopping to do. I was hoping to force the GOG into purchasing a new cardigan or two, the thick ones that can be worn as jackets. No, he saw nothing he liked. The colours are wrong. The styles are wrong. As we did not spend any money on him, I spent it on me. Whilst in BHS, I found a new bustenhalter in a colour I did not have. I also found a new dress, and two pairs of jimjams - the silky slinky ones, but one of the pairs is toooo good to sleep in, I shall wear it as a "lounging around" outfit when the summer comes back. I also found two CDs, Russell Watson singing Anthems, and Military Wives. This accomplished, I suggested to the GOG we treat ourselves to lunch at a nearby Carvery, since it was lunch time. On the way home, we stopped off at SainsCo for some grocery shopping, then went to visit MIL. And, such was my day ..... sigh ... nothing has been done in the house. Ah well, the sun will still rise tomorrow.

Well Petunia I am quite amazed at your painting. What can I say. I had no idea you were such an accomplished artist. I had no idea that it was de rigeur for toes to have square eyes attached to them. Are you sure that tree trunks should be that colour? The fairies are everywhere, doncha know. Ask Arthur Conan Doyle .......... ;-) BTW, you didnt add a Where's Wally to your picture ...... or a Kilroy Woz Here.

Beatrice would have been searching for rakes in the shrubbery. I often go into my shrubbery with a rake. I think she meant a certain Red Top, when she referred to the sun, and is aiming to get a photograph published on Page Three. It is said that our eyesight can be damaged by staring at the sun, but MFH has stared at Page Three every day for many years and his eyesight is just fine - apart from the artificial lenses because he developed cataracts.

Uh - no - *stamps foot with a firm hand*. I will not swap the lavender for herbs and spices. I am not unstitching all those little bags to throw out perfectly good lavender. However I will work all night to provide you with the herb and spice sachets you have set your heart on. They will be ready in time for breakfast.

No, I dont have any tailoring skills, dear, you misheard me. I did not inherit any of Papa's tailoring skills at all.

Now, you must let me go home so you can come and visit me and chose a Chinese Fan Palm in a pot. Shall we say some time in November?

CC

*thinks* I really cannot understand it. I have spent much time packing up my meagre possessions into my portmanteaux, bandboxes, hatboxes, and cases, and everything is back in the wardrobes again. Petunia is busy turning me into another Pat rish aaaaah, and I want to go home. There is no place like home, there is no place like home. And who pinched my ruby red slippers?

Come and sit by me Cherry dear. We are about to eat dinner, and I know you like to relax on a full stomach. I have all your favourites dear, and I think this will be out Last Supper.............

I feel I have been very selfish dear, and kept you away long enough from your loved ones, and the delightful town in which you live. These bright lights and heady company will wear you out dear.

Come and eat dear, and while you are relaxing I shall get Pat-trish-aaaah to pack your things up for you. I have asked George to hire a small van for the morning, and he will take you, your suitcases and boxes full of the things you ordered from Hamazon back to your own dear little home.

Have a good nights sleep dear, and I shall leave early in the morning for Church, and then the WI meeting afterwards.

I hate goodbyes, and a prolonged one will do neither of us any good. I toast your good health and wish you a safe journey..................

Sniffs, and dabs a tear away with the corner of a lace edged hankerchief...............


Auntie Petunia
[sobs gently]

Dont be sad, Petunia dear. Just think of how many rooms in Motie Towers you will regain, once my possessions are removed.

Naturally, to avoid insulting your notions of hospitality, I will be with you for Sunday luncheon. And, I will stay until I have partaken of Sunday tea!! Tinned salmon sandwiches, washed down with tea. Followed by a Victoria sponge, and another cup of tea. Not forgetting the Elizabeth Shaw mint crisps, and another cup of tea. Aaaaah. I am SO looking forward to it !!

Now, do make an entry in your Filofax that you are visiting me, in my little corner of Norf-London-on-the-Lea, to collect a palm tree in a pot. They are real, you know, not plastic, and I must find a good home for them all.

And so to bed ....... sweet dreams :-D
CC

No, no have another slice of cake dear Cherry. No, if you cannot manage it now, take it home with you.......................no of course you are not being greedy, you can share it with your nearest and dearest.

You have done what? Got Mrs Berry to make up a basket of food for you to take home with you? No of course I dont mind!!!! Perish the thought!!!!!!

I shall be along for the plant next week. Now give me you full address. Yes of course I understand you dont want to give it to me when others are present. You will post it to me. Of course dear I understand...............................

Slowly losing my patience
Auntie Petunia

of course you need my address, Petunia dear

I live at : Hacienda View, 99 Letsby Avenue, Loose Chippings, near Blind Summit.

should you not be able to program this address into the tuktuk's sat nav, just head for Blind Summit and when you get there call me. my phone number is : 6345789.

Aaah I shall so enjoy this final evening at Motie Towers. Dinner, Downton Abbey on TV, supper ... and then George can drive me back to Loose Chippings. All my worldly possesions are packed into the van but I will add the basket of food that Mrs Berry so thoughtfully put together for me, last of all.

I hope you will not miss me too much, dear. After all, I have made myself quite indispensible, have I not? All the dusting and polishing I have done, and helping Mrs Berry in the kitchen and all the menial work that entails.

Still, you must look on the bright side. You may be losing a house guest, but you will regain a Tower.

Now, dont cry dear. I shall come and stay with you again :-D

CC

Good Evening from a sunny but chilly Essex, well it was earlier now it's nearly dark :-)

This afternoon dears myself, MOG and our youngest went for a public house lunch, well dears MOG and youngest chose something with chips:-( myself I thought I would have a simple roast beef dinner, now I quite like my vegetable's on the firm side but firm/hard roast potatoes...............no no no never:-( :-( crosses that hostelry off my list.

Auntie Petunia can you spare a piece of cake please :-) I am still hungry :-(

Bon Voyage FTE I hope you enjoy every moment of your new adventure :-)

Good morning ladies,

Well what a weekend weather wise, ye gads. We were assaulted by very high winds and heavy rains.. Consequently, no MOB shopping was done. We did manage to check out the venue and I am pleased to tell you Petunia, I shant have to get me jugs out :-).

Back to the weather, my brother, who lives very near me, had his hot water overflow pipe, snapped off the roof by the winds and his direct neighbour had there garden furniture 'rerarranged' by the wind. We think a mini tornado may have swept through. Fruit and I had a wild but safe drive home from our outing, her OH came across trees down over the main road. We passed him on the road so must have been just minutes ahead of the falling timbers :-D.

CC, I trust you are safely setteld back at your own abode?. Your FH must be pleased to have his skiv, errr, wife back :-D. Enjoy your hamper...

Lesley, did you complain about your tatties?. We went to luncheon yesterday and had lovely meals, however the service was a bit slack. A tad annoying when one is charged a small fortune :-|. I politely pointed out a spelling msitake on the menu :-S

Hugs to Teresa as she farewells FTE <3. Safe travels to your fruit.

Tis Monday again so time to ready myself for work. I need the rain to go away so I can paint our new fence.... I have given up on the grass seed until the fence is painted and I can try and beat the birdies at their own game...

Toodle pip
Susan

Oh dear, only me today?

I too am not here, off to ready for work.

Tatty bye,

Susan

OH MY GOD

I AM STILL HERE AT MOTIE TOWERS

WHAT HAS HAPPENED? WHAT WENT WRONG?

After supper last night, dear Petunia escorted me out of the front door, with one of her strange little dances.

George packed me into the car along with all my boxes, portmanteaux, and hatboxes. It was a bit of a tight fit. Well we turned on to the North Circular Road and all seemed to be going well. Then, he handed me a hip flask and asked if I wanted a drink. So I had a drink. Then ... all went dark.

And I now find myself back at Motie Towers, and all my clothes are hanging in the wardrobe in the Green Room, and my shoes are neatly stored at the bottom, and Tricki Woo is subjecting me to a staring competition.

Where is Petunia? Where is Pat rish aaaah? Why am I still here?

SSSSCCCCRRRREEEEAAAAMMMM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CC

Hi Lesley, its probably no consolation to know that London-on-the-Lea is also decidedly chilly and we have more rain tonight.

Hi Susan, I hope your weather is settling down, I would have thought you'd be enjoying balmy spring days by now. Mini tornadoes seem to be on the increase, the UK has seen a few of them over the last few years.

Sorry to hear that both you ladies were not totally satisfied with your pub lunches. Get your respective OHs to take you out again, to remedy the situation .... it'll only cost money :-D

I expect Teresa is feeling sorrowful at the moment, but hope that FTE's von voyage went well and as I said before, I wish her every success in her new career. She will build up a wonderful storehouse of memories.

CC

Good Evening

No I didn't complain Susan :-( many other people were so I just let them get on with it :-D

CC please don't send the rain this way:-( anymore and my MOG wont be able to get on with his toil:-( and that means no dosh for a retrospective meal:-( worse than that he will be under my feet all day:-( Nooooooooooooooo rescue me :-D

~~~~~~~~~~~~To Petunia and Teresa I hope you are both well.