General Chat

arrived just in time to see Eldrick being carted off by some odd looking "ladies"in white coats going towards

He had to get some support for his onions.

So, gathering a crowd he got them all to chant "Eldrick's onions, Eldrick's onions Oi Oi Oi!" several times.

This gathering and the ritual chanting soon attracted the attention of the boys in blue who

she was big and buxom and her very large red bloomers rather put him off,
he was very worried about his onions,they were looking very windswept and dangling by a thread,,he knew what he had to do next-----

He started singing you take the high rd, IL`L take the low rd An IL`L be in scotland afore yee .me
& my true friend will never meet again on






Its a braw breck moonlight neght toneght ;o)

Tailor...he wanted them to be tailor maid. So pleasant when it came to his inside leg measurement but

what about my onions he thought,cant have them flapping in the wind like this must get a new pair of pants,he was off as quickly as he could towards the direction of the------

neeps, to prevent any further damage

looked down & thought better be carefull here .i will keep my hand on my

hand, which was to make his way with the utmost speed to Scotland. However, he still had to evade capture by the Sisterhood of Perpetual Naggers as well as the demented monks who were trying to change his daily habit.

Descending the oak tree he was suprised to find a squirrel nibbling its nuts.

That's vert athletic, thought Eldrick as he

he made his escape up the nearest great oak from where he could scan the horizon and make plans to return to the task in

that caused him to flee in the opposite direction at the speed of a lobomized snail ,they soon caught up to him and

where they put their brooms. It was such a hot, sunny day, there was optimism in the air that

the sisterhood of perpetual naggers ,and they have been on the roads for
months looking for

the sound of the crowd. " Eee look" cried the hairy one" is that Phill Oakey and the Human League singing over the hill"

"ooo ek "cried our hero, "its our Phill alright but I dont remember the backing singers looking so rough"

"ee up" thought the hairy one, they are not the backing singers, its

around the corner came the Hairy Biker with his side car firmly attached.

"hop in meladdo" yelled the Hairy one, so he did and they raced away in to the distance to the sound of

outrun the voracious pack when

As I might be legging it fast if any of my Large (Really Large ) Harem come sniffing around (The Neeps and onions were by this time giving off a bit of a Pong) he went in and discovered that they could accomodate him for a short time (No Overnighters) however having no cash he had to pay in kind and (See you Jimmy) was at hand to make sure he did, he was just about to do the Highland Fling when there was a sound of the Hounds (Of Baskerville Fame) howling and baying on his trail ,they had found him so he had to tie up his breeches and try to

The most beautifull woman he had ever seen .but when he looked closer it had at least a days growth of beard .omg he turned round &

banged the knocker on the door several times. 'I should get some succour here', he thought to himself. The door opened and there stood

well it wont matter I'm allowd to keep me boots on , its my onions I'm worried about The red lamp was still flickering so he