General Chat

my heart goes out to you both xx
be strong Brenda

Brenda - I have only just discovered your thread and have read it through from the first post. I see so much of what I went through with my OH and I can sympathise with you.
I'm not qualified to give advice, although I'm sure others here may be - but I agree with them that you must look after yourself so that you will be able to visit Dan and spend time with him. If he is on morphine, he should not be feeling any pain.
By all means have your say to the people who think they know best - but don't let it hastle you. Take care of yourself. You need all your strength.
God bless - we are all thinking of you.

So very sorry for you both Brenda.

today's update.
Had more grandchildren to see him,tiring me out,but at the same time trying to be normal.s.i.l.is staying with me tonight as daughter and others have gone home.At least Mick will do a few jobs around the house and he is very quiet.
DAn was a bit feisty today when we went,but talking some rubbish and then lucid moments.did manage to get rhubarb and custard and quite a lot of drinks and some fruit salad tonight,but nothing substantial to get his sugar levels down.At least he is getting some fluids.
Will see what tomorrow brings.
Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers...much appreciated

Brenda, thinking of you and you husband,
wow what a wife you have been, you have done everything possible for Dan and l'm sure he is so proud of you,
now you take care, x

Hello Brenda,

So sorry to read your update. Sending a big hug to you at this difficult time,

Susan

Thinking of you, Brenda. BC XX

My thoughts are with you and Dan, Brenda, you have both been through so much and I can only hope Dan will be peaceful and painfree. You will have time to tell him how much he means to you all and he knows how well you have cared for him and fought his corner.

It must hurt you to know that he has been through so much more of late, with all the indignity and such but you can deal with that later as long as he is being cared for well now and you can spend time with him.

Take care of yourself too, altho it's hard to be selfish at such a time, you must get some rest when you can as whatever happens your road ahead is not going to be easy.

love and hugs,

Lizxx

Sorry to hear this Brenda. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
You take care too
Love Mary xx

I am sorry to hear that Brenda. Please know that we are all here for you, to listen to and to lean on. Nobody could have done more for Dan than you have and I am sure that he knows that. He has been ill for so long that he is probably just tired and ready to let go. Please don't worry that there is more you could have done, you couldn't. Maybe he would have been ready even if he had not had the recent hassle, the body can only stand so much.

Bless him and I hope the morphine is keeping him pain free.

Brenda, am so sorry to hear that. You need to hang in there for a little while longer to be there for him, then you need to take a long rest, knowing that you couldnt have done more yourself. Take care now.

So Sorry to hear that Brenda, sending love and prayers to you and the family.
Take Care xo
Ingrid

I am sorry to hear that Brenda.

Best wishes.

Huia.

Not been on here as had family.Sorry to say Dan is giving up and we don't think he has long.He is refusing medication,food and is now on morphine and not always lucid.We can hardly make out what he says,and believe me he was always loud.I thought he was saying side yesterday,meaning his side was hurting,but it was fine as had been his stock saying to everyone all through his illness.
friends and family are being fantastic,but I am so tired as can't sleep much.Think it's just a waiting game that's been hastened on by his bad treatmentand being pushed from here to there.

Not been on here as had family.Sorry to say Dan is giving up and we don't think he has long.He is refusing medication,food and is now on morphine and not always lucid.We can hardly make out what he says,and believe me he was always loud.I thought he was saying side yesterday,meaning his side was hurting,but it was fine as had been his stock saying to everyone all through his illness.
friends and family are being fantastic,but I am so tired as can't sleep much.Think it's just a waiting game that's been hastened on by his bad treatmentand being pushed from here to there.

Thanks Huia.

Brenda I hope you have managed to get some rest this weekend so far so you have had a chance to gather your thoughts for the meeting.

Take care,

Lizxx

I am a nurse livung in wales and ive neverheard anything like it.here in wales ,we have one of the best homecare services around.(this is not a n.h.s.problem,but one for your local council)homecare services do provide overnight care when its needed,andalso provide carers to come out and help you with toileting,putting to bed and washing.but like i said in my previous post,they arenot allowedto lift very heavy patients incase of injury to themselves andto the patient.x

brenda, at last you may get your chance to have your say. you are the only one to be able to stand up for your OH and yourself. Try not to lose your temper but be Very certain that they are going to have to listen and be sure of your facts. I have to stand up for my OH as he will not complain, but i wont have him treated badly. You should be able to get support from the police federation too. Health authorities do not see the smaller picture of how their decisions affect peoples lives and they need reminding that people are not counters to be moved about as they please. My thoughts will be with you on Monday and hope you get what you need.

Dear Brenda
My heart goes out to you re the treatment that you and your husband have endured. I trained as a nurse in the 1960s and believe me we would have been dismissed if we had reacted as you have told us on here.

Please please do not allow your husband to be placed anywhere until YOU have
a) visited the home, rehab or any other place
b) send me a personal message if you need help with what to look at and see.
c) telephone the local authority and ask and ask for the latest Inspection Report of ant home before you visit it.

You also should receive support, so if there is anything else I can help you with just send me a message.

On a fantastic note I have just realised who Izzy is!! So am saying hello to Izzy as well. My son is still in the Army and doing well. Going back you know where early next year.
Hope you remember me, Izzy

Bridget in Spain
13.58 hrs
Sun shining after twelve hours of torrential rain and thunderstorms
:-) :-)

So sorry to hear of your problems, have you tried contacting the Police Welfare Dept., perhaps they could help,
All good wishes,
Liz