General Chat

Hi everyone,

Rita, re 'what sir name will the child have' .
Good question, as I'm not sure who is the actual father, Elton or David. Nothing has been said as far as I know. Maybe it will be Dwight (Elton's name before he changed it.)!!!!!!!!!! (only joking).
Also, they seem to have retained their own sir names. You never hear of Elton Furnish or David John. Will have to wait and see I guess.

rita, call me old fashioned but i agree with you. the reason they didnt adopt someone in this country is because they are both too old. not sure what the limit is around 40 or maybe younger not sure.

even in this modern world, children at school can still be cruel. so when a child asks what does your mum do? and he says i dont have a mum but 2 dads, can u imagine what other kids will say to that. i know a lady whos husband was 10 years older than her and at the xmas concert one child said to her son, why isnt your dad here only your grandad. he then said actually he is my dad and the child laughed and said god he is ancient. the child was really upset by that remark.

so i feel sorry for this child when he goes to school. of course seeing as his dad is nearly a millionaire, it will be a private school or more obvious being tutored privately at home.

i doubt very much if he will have a "normal" upbringing like the rest of us.
even those of us brought up by our grandparents still had a mother figure in our lives.

florence

Zachary Jackson Levon Furnish-John

that's the name...I imagine if he can live with that, he shouldn't have any trouble living with telling people he has two dads............

removes tongue from cheek...

Dear All

Hello

Hope you are okay.

I am very glad that a new life has arrived safely in the world and will be much loved and wanted.

Take gentle care
Very best wishes
xx

They have not become parents.

They have bought a child.

Oh Uggers you put what my thoughts are,

over indulgence celeb power money buying.--

but I think David will make the better parent.

but feel it was all planned in time as a christmas gift for them both...

Apparently, according to TV news, they were intending to adopt an orphan from Ukraine, a child with aids. But because they are not a heterosexual (sp) couple the Hungarian Government would not allow it.

edit I said Hungary because that is what OH thought he heard on the news but he got it wrong, sorry.

"Last year the couple tried to adopt a 14-month-old HIV positive boy from Ukraine named Lev.

However, Ukrainian officials said Sir Elton, 63, was too old and his civil partnership with Mr Furnish, 48, would not be recognised as a marriage by Kiev.

In December, Mr Furnish told the BBC that they were working to ensure Lev and his brother "have the best health care, education and family options available to them".

"dont think it is nice for a child to grow up without a mother by two males."

Why not Rita ?? - There are plenty of kids being brought up by a single Heterosexual father with no close female role model. Do you find it distasteful too ? Or are you just homophobic ?

As for genes & answers, I'm sure The Furnish-John family know everything there is to know about the birth mother, who no doubt has had every test under the sun prior to pregnancy. They also have her personal details as well for future reference.

Uggers
"My instinct is that they're too old and self indulgent. I also feel it's a shame that they didn't take on a child already in this world and in need of parenting"

They tried to adopt a child but was declined as same sex marriages wasn't recognised in the country. Their age will go against them in this country I suspect as well

................................. ................
I wish them well with their new family. I only had 14 years with my mum who was only 38. People can die anytime, but its the quality of love & life that child has whilst he does have his parents, and supportive extended family & close friends which is important.

"Yuk. Not natural."

Ronald - What a bigoted offensive remark !
----------------------------

"They have not become parents.

They have bought a child"

No Brian, they have become parents in one of the only options left open to them. Most registered surrogates only get paid expenses anyhow. That is, loss of earnings whilst pregnant, medical care esp USA) & reasonable living expenses. If they give the biological mother more money its their choice. Its her choice & the majority of surrogates do it as they want to help childless people & they get a deep satisfaction doing so

I may be mistaken but I thought age was usually only a barrier to adopting babies rather than children?

No Idea Uggers x

Maybe like most couples they feel a baby will fit in as their own child easier than an older child who may find the transition more difficult & who may find it harder to accept them as parents.

This applies to all would be parents regardless of sexuality.

I think it takes a special couple / person to adopt an older child / child with disabilities.. Its better they realise what age children they can parent with a happy outcome from the start, but I do feel sad for those who dont get adopted x

Sue~~~David Furish is 48 according to the Daily Mail....!?

Rita-~~~ Baby's surmame as Sue mentioned in first post is Furnish - John.

Sandie.x

How do we know whether the surrogate mother will be a discreet part of this little one's life? We don't and may never know.

Little Zac will be loved and cared for and whether a Nanny does a lot of the practical caring or David and Elton do, why should it matter? There are many children who have high flying parents in business who seldom see their children, they are often sent away to school so the staff there more or less bring them up except in holidays, should they not have children?

I understand Elton has retired from songwriting and more now so will be around a lot, and even if they go partying, it will be while the baby is asleep and with a babysitter or such so he won't really be affected till he is much older and by then he will be used to that way of life and maybe Elton and David won't even want to go partying much.

It's great that they are helping to provide for little Lev and his brother and it's possible they will form a bond and relationship with those children too, even if not allowed to adopt them or have them living with them.

I am not so sure any council or country would let them adopt, even in England so if this is the way they want to feel fulfilled and have a child of their own, then good for them.

I saw a programme a while back about the two gay men who had several children with surrogate mothers, and they were the nicest children, polite, pleasant, all different in their characters and ability but happy, well rounded and a sight better behaved than some kids I have seen and met over the years, one or two of them children of dear friends of mine who have been over indulged and spoiled by parents who haven't an iota of the money Elton John has.

Good luck to Elton, David and Zachary.

Lizx

well said Liz x

But they arent adopting as such by media reports,

"""Elton has become a father at age 63""".

the child will brought up by a natural parent in the household,,,Elton .lots of single dads world wide.

Dad and David.

but their ages will be a let down in some togetherness active areas later on.

I know a child who spends time with her dad and partner alll 3 have a lovely relationship..

I do have a few concerns about their ages but that is my only concern.

Thousands of children are living in homes with same sex parents and studies show they differ not a scrap from children raised by heterosexual couples. I'm sure little Zac will find different names for his 2 dads as I did for my 2 grandfathers.

All children get teased in school - kids will always find something that marks a child as different - if it turns to bullying I'm sure their teachers will deal with it.

Children are given letter to be signed by a parent or guardian no teacher specifies an individual who has to sign it. Many children live in homes with other than those with 2 natural parents, it's not a rarity. There are fostered children, one parent familes and step families - difficult to define what is "normal".

As long as they are shielded from the ignorance of others and have issues explained as they arise they will be fine. If they have 2 parents who love them then they have a lot more than some children.

Gwynne

I admit to being old fashioned, but if asked to jump one way, I'd say it's fundamentally wrong.
I know the child will have many benefits, but it opens the door to others and I think it is yet another step in what I see as a downward spiral. in society.

Happy days

Harry, the door is already open surely?

I can't see that it is in any way a 'downward spiral' to have two parents who wish to raise a child , with love presumably, and have reached that decision and had to think about it and actively 'work at it', as opposed to the 'old fashioned way' of a man and woman who may not want a child but want the bit that goes before conception with heedless abandon lol.

There are so many children of the conventional family...mother and father...who lead miserable lives, some do not survive. That is the 'downward spiral' in society, it began long before surrogacy was an option that's for sure...it's fueled by selfishness and greed, ignorance and anger at the real or perceived injustices of life maybe.

I have to agree with you Harry.
Old parents can be brilliant, but I know how I felt that my mother had me late in life. What it was to be brought up with no-one of a similar age in the family. Don't get me wrong I loved my mum and when I had my own children she became a different person in my eyes because we finally had something to bond us. I remember a neighbours child where her father was quite ancient and the child used to ask him to drop her off before she got to school because she didn't want her schoolfriends seeing her retired father. This was before she went to grammar school so she wasn't even eleven. I also have same sex friends with a child and know that they have been subjected to harrassment from older children because of their situation and a nicer couple you couldn't wish to meet. There are many problems in this world which we all have to deal with as they arrive but possibly creating one is the dilemma. .....When I see a bird making a nest prior to having its young I always feel that as humans we could all learn lessons.-jl