General Chat

I honestly hadn't thought of 'smoothly' in that detail, Janey and I'm rather wishing you hadn't :)

Let's just say my mind is growing wonderfully focused, Uggers. I will be seeing toilet humour just about anywhere for the next few days, methinks. ;)

What a strange thread and having got to this point there seems to be no point in voting 'cos I've read enough about it already:-))

I wish you luck - but I can't say I'll be thinking of you because that brings up a "visual" I'd rather not have;-)))

S x

what are you all doing? i was trying to keep her talking about breakfast, you've got her talking about after effects and toilet movements.....my god what is wrong with you people?


oh actually I told her to go ahead.....it was a moment of madness. sorry

Rose....I thought you had left GR?


JC made me look on here

x

That's the problem, Sue Maid.

You can't vote without being properly informed!

I mean, lots of people do, every election. But I know you wouldn't want to. ;)


We could go back to our favourite egg salad recipes. What is it you call it? Egg mayonnaise.

Or tuna. An American walks into a restaurant and orders a tuna fish sandwich. A Canadian orders a tuna sandwich and just assumes it will be fish.

Rose is supposed to be making herself useful, now that she's still here and all. And doing a not too good job of it, that I've seen so far. ;)

Archetypal, RR, archetypal!

So let me get this straight JC. You want us to vote on whether we want any info before and after the procedure but to make sure we make an informed vote you are going to give us the details anyway. As I said - a very strange thread:-))

I do take it that you will not be reporting *during* the procedure.

S x

Oh, if only I had one of those little modern gadgets I could send text from, from anywhere ...

Round about when I had my first cataract done -- I think it was afterward -- I read somebody's first-person account of the whole thing. Not like mine at all, unfortunately. He was happy and watching the light show. I was miserable and all tensed up and in pain.

I'll just have to make sure I remember all the salient details. ;)



Cereally, folks. There are a lot of people older than me here, who should have been getting this done or be doing it sometime soon. I remember reading about the NHS sending out invitations a while back.

We have ad campaigns here.

Watch one here:

http://www.ccsif.ca/blushingbottomad.htm

"Don't die of embarrassment"

http://www.ccsif.ca/ads.htm#dontdie

The public service announcements starting in 2001 "were the first naked bums ever to be approved for a television audience". In a commercial, I guess. ;)

tsk well I did come up with 'epitome' which I thought was quite good....

and don't forget ladies, while we're on a medical theme self-examination of the 'chest' area on a regular basis ...if not I can recommend an elderly but extremely thorough Doctor...

yes I am still here.... though...had I known we were to be treated to an episode of 'Carry on up the Canuck'...I might have considered that spending my £9.95 could have waited a bit ;)

((((hugs))) Janey xx

If it is for bowel cancer Janey (calling a spade a spade) we have tests sent out in the post which we then return, but not colonoscopy unless (I think) those tests prove positive.

yes I am still here.... though...had I known we were to be treated to an episode of 'Carry on up the Canuck'...I might have considered that spending my £9.95 could have waited a bit ;)

Sorry that has to be the funniest line on GR I've seen in a long time Rose lol

Ann - here in Aus. we also have the tests sent out by post when you turn 50. A great government initiative.

S x

My OH has had it done. He also had an endoscopy (camera and tube down the top end). His first comment was that he hoped they weren't using a box brownie. lol The second was that he hoped they weren't using the same tube!! lol He was so heavily sedated he remembered nothing. Hope it all goes well for you.

I like my threads. People say wonderfully bizarre things in them.

That's right, it was the poop sample tests you guys got there. I've never done that. Straight to the big deal for me. Genetics.


Here's what google tells me.

http://www.colorectal-cancer.ca/en/screening/screening-tests/


Clearly, being screened as part of a regular physical exam has the potential to save lives and patients who are experiencing symptoms related to colorectal cancer should not delay accessing a screening test nor should patients who are at higher risk of developing the cancer. Briefly, the risk factors for colorectal cancer are:

Age: the older you are, the more likely you are to develop colorectal cancer.
Heredity: you are more likely to develop colorectal cancer if someone in your family, especially a first degree relative (child, sibling, parent) has been diagnosed with it
Diet: a diet high in red meat and low in fruits and vegetables may increase you risk
Weight: obesity and a lack of physical activity increase the risk
Alcohol Consumption: alcohol, especially beer, may increase the risk. Lower rates of colorectal cancer have been found in those who drink no alcohol
Smoking: smoking also increases the risk of developing colorectal cancer


But of course. Smoking and sitting around.

This is me:

Individuals with a family history of either colorectal cancer or colorectal adenomas diagnosed in a first-degree relative (i.e. parent, sibling, child) before age 60 years [my sister was 42]

"The preferred and more frequently administered screening test for increased risk adults is colonoscopy to begin at age 40 years or ten years earlier than the youngest diagnosis of colorectal cancer or polyps in the family. "

Well, I was well past 40 when my sister was diagnosed. ;)

I think it's saying age 60 for normal people -- but I have to sign off. A huge storm has very suddenly kicked up, maybe our bit of Earl, and I think I'd better disconnect!

Poor Janey, my OH had this done a few months ago & spent about 12 hours hovering around outside the toilet, dashing in & out like a startled rabbit. You have to be quick, so you'd best get in a bit of training this weekend. If you're not so quick on your feet it might be as well to take a book & a blanket into the loo & set up camp. Hope the journey to the "place of procedure" isn't too far. I'm sure you'll be fine. The rest of it's a doddle.
Good luck. x

Well, despite being so lazy and thus at increased risk, I'm very quick on my feet, so I think I'll handle that part okay! We eat a pretty high-fibre diet here, so we're no strangers to that dash. ;)

Of course, I'll have to try to avoid catching my toe in my pyjama leg and landing facedown on the rug (or worse) again. Extra care will be taken!

The journey to the torture chamber is a fairly quick taxi ride. It's mid-afternoon the day after I start the regimen, so things had better be all settled down by then, I would hope! As the cab driver undoubtedly would too.


I'm hoping that all those mentioning they've had this done came out with good results, by the way. I'm fully expecting to myself, it's just one of those cautious-doctor things in my case.

My sister, on the other hand, had had actual symptoms -- the bloody stool. The doctor doing the procedure reassured her heartily: at her age and in her good health, certainly it would be haemmorhoids. He had put on a different face when he re-emerged, the one that said 7-cm tumour.

Anyhow, my plan, just like the last eye surgery, is to start demanding Adavan before I give them my health card at the desk ...

Time for Coronation Street on tape and din here now! The storm died as fast as it rose. Words of wisdom, or bad jokes, will be read tomorrow afternoon your time. ;)

Colonoscopies are no joke , but these comments during the exam were quite
humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments
made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their
colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!

10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

12. "Boy, now I know why I am not gay."

And the best one of all...

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up
there?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aw, BC, you googled it for me! And such useful results. ;)

Yes, I like No. 13. Conversely, when No.1's time comes, I could write a note for the doc to ask him to look for his. ;)

*blushes....afraid I DID Google it Janey....well lets face it there aren't many jokes going round about colonoscopies...and I didn't want you to get back here tomorrow and find nothing humorous...lol.....BC