General Chat

Hi Bob, long time no speak..., hello Jean, and hi again Huia.

I love the way you bring humour to your problems - I have to say having been a cleaner for several elderly neighbours until nearly 3 years ago, they certainly didn't have a problem watching me vacuum their carpets and clean their loos! I always swore I wouldn't be a cleaner but needs must when I had to earn some extra cash and I could be fairly flexible and go when I felt well enough. I also found they were very glad of the company those of them that lived alone and loved having someone to chat with as I worked and they sat!
Now of course, I struggle to clean this house of o.h's but as he doesn't do it, I have to make the effort if it's his birthday, my birthday, Christmas or visitors threaten to call. it is made harder by all my things stuck around as he never really made room for me and there are no bookshelves or decent sized wardrobes so too much stuff about and not in a 'home' Can you believe someone would take all the trouble to make built in wardrobes with sliding mirror doors but not measure the depth of coat hangers so everything has to be pushed at a slant to close the doors, and as he is ham fisted, lots of my things get ripped at the shoulders when he gets the hangers wrong and they get stuck in the doors.

Jean, I would think about asking around to see if anyone knows a good cleaner, you could ask her to start by doing the bathrooms and kitchen, and vacuuming the carpets or cleaning the floors while you dust your ornaments and such so that they were not around for long and did the bulk of the work, or did whatever you find hardest.

You could also think about having those bought in meals and getting enough for half the week - that way you could cook sometimes when you felt able and fancied something special and the other days you could use the bought in meals. If you do the transition gradually you won't feel quite so redundant and will free up time and energy for yourself, so you can do what you please without feeling you are neglecting things badly.

Anyway folks, take care

I must get to bed, it's daylight outside and still raining!!!

Haven't seen Sharron for a while, hope she is ok

Love
Lizxxx

Wot Flies!

Surprisingly, Epsom flies are not high-fliers as are some of the people who live here. They can't make to the first floor. That's the flies I mean!
Now with all those racing stables in Epsom UK that might be a different matter.

Bob, I am shocked that you should even suggest making those poor defenceless little spiders homeless. Think of the good they do catching all those flies.

Huia.

I started this but before I got a word down had to take one daughter and grandchild to airport after their visit for Mother's Day. So here we go again.
Being an pseudo-farmer I have seen those things used around the cowshed and while in the spring the yards do have green carpets all the keen farmers hate them so badly they brush all evidence away after each milking before the dairy inspector calls (that is if they still do that), It is quite funny that the yards gets re-carpeted twice each day so I think that using them is an excercise in futility. They are quite useful for getting those cobwebs down but those of us who shall be nameless and have "blind eyes" do not see any of those things in their homes do they?
The carpet on our floors now belong to the landlord so we do have some responsibility but be assured they get the same infrequent treatment as they got when they were ours. Not having cats or dogs does help.
I know I could get help (even "Down-Under" here in NZ) if I asked, but there is something soul-destroying to be sitting down and watching and hearing someone else doing one's "H***E-W**K". I would find it hard to hold back the tears (perhaps from laughter). I have heard that it is good exercise as well not like wasting that energy in a gym (more tears of laughter at such a sight).
I love our slow-cooker and the stews and soups that it produces and the surplus can be used for days when I feel even lazier than doing poached eggs.

Bob, I have something in what we call the broom cupboard that is shaped like a T but the stem is rather longer and the cross piece has a lot of whiskers on it. Would that be a broom? If so, what is it for? As for ironing, well I rarely do any. Just a couple of my summer skirts which tend to get creased badly.

Huia (who doesnt have carpet so rarely uses her vaccuum cleaner and tells people she only sweeps the floor if she is expecting visitors or if her head is bumping the ceiling).

Jean

If you are in the UK you can always ask for a carers assessment. This will help determine what help you need and what is available for you.

There is no obligation on your part to accept the help, but at least it will give you peace of mind

A Very Happy Mother's Day to All

I have always had a very high regard for mothers. Since becoming a carer I have felt that they need a medal although some hardly get a "Thank You". I notice how easily the plates accumulate in the sink as if they are planted and are growing like the flourishing garden I used to have. I do not even feel like putting them in the dishwasher, so that has to be pretty lazy. When some one asked about vacuuming I respond with amazement "Are you supposed to do that, I am learning all the time". I try to hang things on the rack in the gas hot water cylinder room so that ironing is minimised and generally only slacks and shirts are done. A widow friend told me that her husband always liked the towels ironed and though he has been dead for about fifteen years she still irons the towels. I like the feel of a crisp towel after a shower. That's my excuse and I am sticking to it.
I must admit that getting weight off is not easy. But with a good breakfast of porridge bran and wheatmeal raw sugar and trim milk sets me up for the day and I can eat some fruit for lunch and miss out morning and afternoon snacks. We generally have fish or one of my stews for dinner and if I am lazy (poached or scrambled eggs). Having kept fowls in the early part of our marriage I always would say to anyone who thought that eggs were dear (in those days we got 6/- a dozen in the winter) no one would sit down and eat a dozen eggs but would happily eat the same value in a piece of steak.

I tried hard and got down to 76 kilos about a year ago but now average around 80. Even though that is down 5 kilos from my topweight it would still probably be regarded as mildly obese. Once you have avoided the biscuit tin for a few days you do not miss it.

Happy day tomorrow

Bob

Jean, I can still cook for myself, but then I dont do fancy cooking. As for h****w**k, I am too lazy to do it, likewise gardening. I pay somebody to mow the lawns and that is it. I dont know when you should seek help, I am afraid.

Huia.

Can I ask everybody, at what stage of health do you feel justified in asking for help? I can take care of personal things, but I feel that I am not caring for the home as I used to, and cooking is becoming a real chore. O.H. cant understand the change in me who could do so much.

Jean, I need to lose several stone :((((

I have found in the past that I can lose about half a stone and then the body says 'famine' and calls a halt to the weight loss. Not fair. Some people can eat all sorts of junk food and not put on any weight.

Huia.

Huia, my sympathy. I could do with losing a stone, but cant think what I can cut out to do it. Dont eat anything with sugar in anyway. Upping my thyroxine lost me 7lbs and then it stopped.

Well I am still here, have been keeping busy. I bought myself some new bathroom scales last week as I was horrified when I stepped onto the old ones. I hadnt weighed myself for about 18 months. Ooooh, I cant weigh that much can I? The trouble is, the last year or so that Phil was at home, every time we went shopping when we went through the checkout he would want to buy chew bars of one sort or another. He always insisted on getting 2, one for him and one for me. He was like a small child. Wouldnt take no for an answer. He never put weight on, but I did. Now I have to work very hard to try to get it off. And I have to give up some of the things I like.

:(((((

Huia.

Haven't been on this this site for a while, just hope everyone is OK.
Please update.
Thanks

Thats a brilliant book Bob and it does leave you thinking.

What a great find, your gggg grandfathers letters. Think they will be interesting.

Hugs to all carers.

Hi All

Well I have finished "Tuesdays with Morrie" and am so pleased my neighbour lent it to me. However briefly, the author Mitch Albom was certainly at the coal face when he was there. While reading, carers would certainly feel as though they were in the writer's shoes.

Regards now sounds too aloof so with love

Bob

Wow, Bob, I wish somebody would send me something like that. It would be great to read them. Now if it was about my Taylor side, it might tell me where my gt gt granddad was born. Unfortunately I cannot find him on the 1841 census and he died before the 1851 census :-(((

Huia.

Hi All
Wot twice in one day?
Seeing it is a genealogical site I thought I should share that I received an pleasant email this morning. My GGGG grandfather was a carver and gilder. I have just received 76 pages of transcriptions of letters he wrote to his employer between 1778 and 1808. If any thought that I was verbose, then perhaps it comes down both sides of the family.
Regards
Bob
PS Now that is a dilemma! Will I continue reading "Tuesdays with Morrie" where after about three pages I have just learned that Morrie had Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis, also know as Motor Neurone disease, which was the condition that killed my best friend 30 years ago. As my neighbour lent me the book in exchange for my lending him the one by the same author "Have a Little Faith".
Grandad's letters have been waiting for over two hundred years so I suppose he won't mind another few days before I read them.

I seem to have lost interest in TV, Bob. I cant be bothered with any programme longer than 30 mins - except for Coro St! and the news. I cant get any stations except TV1 now, used to get 2 and 3 but they didnt excite me. And even 1 is not good reception. I think our aerial has been turning itself around. I must remember next time son comes up to get him to turn it while I watch the screen to see if it improves. I must also remember to get him to check that I put the smoke detector back properly when I changed the battery a month ago. It was d****d difficult to put it back up, and I forgot to ask him when he was up a couple of weeks ago. He is tall so should have no trouble sorting it out.

Off out today to visit Phil again and have a meeting with the principal staff members in his hospital to discuss his management. And ask questions if I remember.

My love to all.

Huia.

Bob, Waiting for God is one of the best programmes on the tele about older people and shows theres life in the old dogs yet. Basil the stud amuses me. I've met some like that!
The pair of us look after each other at the moment and its quite funny sometimes, with us both trying to do housework and both bending rather too much in the middle where we cant stand up straight.

Hi All

Yes I am unaccustomed to being so quiet but thought I should do something about it, having had a swift "kick in the pants" . I hope I was not the only one singled out. If my warped humour is missed, there is always Channel 6 with the English programmes to bring a smile. What about "Waiting for God" that seems very appropriate for someone of my age.

Golf and everything else is going reasonably smoothly (showering excepted, though I can still manage mine fine). My cooking must be doing the trick even though each evening one is still the worst meal ever. Some slacks no longer fit and the others need a little tension to do them up. I know that later elastic tops are required when in full-time care, but call me old-fashioned (like I have never worn jeans in my life) but I have never liked BH in the proverbial track suits that were the rage some years back. Sorry, always thought they looked sloppy even though they may have been comfortable. On the farm I did rough and ragged (barbed-wire fences) but never sloppy. Did favourite hand spun (even some of my own) holey jumpers. Quaint, yes, bizarre, almost certainly, but once again never sloppy. Spinning and weaving our own various coloured wools was our fascinating hobby. On a rainy day it was always nice to sit. card and spin some yarn which was later knitted into plain or fair-isle jumpers. BH wove many cushion covers which we still use.

Hope all is well with others

Bob
PS Maybe it's the jelly and ice cream dessert.