Genealogy Chat

why is it that when people contact you and you allow them access to your tree they dont then allow you access to theirs i am sure some do but so far only one of my contacts have if someone has looke d at your tree and found no link it would be nice if they said so then you can stop hoping for a link and remove the contact. moan over thanks sandra

I have the same moan Sandra! I don't understand why this happens either. I allow whoever to look at my tree ~ I don't mind if they want to look, go right ahead! There may be something there that can help! Sonja

I only allow access to my tree when I am sure of a connection. If they haven't replied to you just cancel their access. The genuine links are usually as keen as yourself to exchange information. Marion

I only allow access to my tree when the person has showed they have done some work on the family. I have one contact that has only put her mother in law on her tree, my aunty. She still has all her brothers and sisters living except one and doesen't show her parents. I feel i would be doing all the work for her as my tree holds 3500 people.

sorry you feel like this george I thought that the idea of this site was to share information and help each other I am quite prepared to do a lot of work and my family think that I have been surgicaly attached to the computor and yes I do realise that I have to go out into the big wide world and will do during the school holidays as and i have sent off for certificates but I am a sharing caring person and replies dont cost anything sandra

I agree with George. When you have spent years and money compiling your tree it is galling when someone who you have been happy to share with, which I have done of lots of occasions, passes all of your hard work onto others as there own. I sent one contact (not a link from this site) loads of info and a few weeks later I had a visit from a guy who showed me this beautiful family tree his brother had done. It was all of my work and I wasn't even acknowledged. I am happy to share but this works both ways. Information is a two way street. Margaret Burton on Trent, Staffs

I can understand your reluctance, but people dont reply even, do you think then that I should not give access to my tree until they reply? I suppose perhaps I am a bit nieve(cant spell either) I will have to just hope someone replys , at least we can rely on this board for some help will sign off now sandra

I have had access to other peoples trees, but I have found that if they have a lot of names it can takes sometime to load and to find the connection. I have not allowed anyone access to my tree over this site, but if a connection is confirmed the I send them a PDF copy of the relevant information, it saves them having to trawl through dozens of names that are not connected to them. Yes it is about sharing, but it does have to work both ways, and when someone has spent years researching they might feel disinclined to hand all that information over to someone who has only just started. Ros

Ros Quite agree, I do the same as you, send a file from my genealogy program. That way they only have to look at the names that are relevent (is that spelt right?) I also like to find recent info, so if they have nothing from days gone by I ask for their details etc so that I can connect with my tree. Some people though do not want to give anything away just want to take. This is what makes me hesitate sometimes before sending anything. Margaret

Would it be possible for the site to record when people who are given access have actually used the access, then the person who has granted it would at least know if the permission had been used. If people then dont make contact with the tree `owner' it will be reasonable to asume that they have not recognised a valid link, and the permission to view can be withdrawn? Sharing information should certainly be a two way street. It can cost £30 to get a full set of certificates(BMD) for an individual, thus circa £1000 for 32 ancestors, not to mention the costs involved in collecting the references in the first place, so why should those who have paid hand out the information to others free of charge and with no other return?

It Did take a long time to learn this lesson.Time and again i would send my tree to people who were definately connected, only to hear nothing back from them. Three of my lines have even turned up on the mormon site all baptised into their church, after i have sent the origianl information. George

I only allow access to my tree if there is a definate link,otherwise you can have a lot of peoples trees on your homepage to view,then find you can't delete them if there is no relevance to yours.

I am selective about the people I show as part of my interlinked families. Where I make contact with someone who can show the line and possibly continue it I am usually delighted to share: I am aware of pirates who will take everything and give little or, probably, nothing in return. This has happened and that makes me very cautious: an attitude I hope others share. I usually send a 'book' which I make up on my computer at home as my tree here is very confusing when someone is looking for a connection. There are links but I haven't put on the 18,000 or so entities on the on site tree that I keep in my files at home. People who put their details on the site and then don't bother to reply to questions make me wonder what they are doing here. Some people put living persons on here and, against site policy, have obviously not asked permission. Ask a question and get the reply along the lines that: it is my aunt's third cousin by her first marriage but I don't really know her. Such people are also apparently unaware of identity theft. There are gripes with what is a good contact site: 1. Putting the same person on twice because you can't link a cousin marrying a cousin or a brother and sister marrying a brother and sister. 2. Trying to identify a female contact who appears with her maiden name as a 'contact' and married name as a correspondent (or vice versa). I have been on this site several years and built up a long list of 'contacts.' 3. Having to untick the 'access to tree' box when making a new contact. A poor move has been made by the management in reintroducing this 'service.' How useful are message boards like this? This is my third year of being a member and today is the first day I have looked at them.

I agree with most of you, not only do you spent you hard earned money on certificates, but there is the time looking as well. In my case lots of trips to London before 1837 came on line. I still go sometimes as it a different feeling to look in the books. Then when you get back there are the parish records. That means trip to the Records office, if its to far then its B & B. It all adds up. I do enjoy it otherwise I wouldn't do it. Then it look ups for people who can't make the trip. I have found lots of rellies sent them information as I don't mind but I don't sent all as I think this will spoil their enjoyment. That's something Gene's has forgotton. The buzz you get from finding the person you have been looking for for ages. Like my Arthur Hinton born abt 1848. Nobody found him for me so its my buzz and it took 4 years. Going to London looking on the Censuses, but his name was not Arthur but Ebenezer Arthur. Even found his death now. It seems now that a lot of people don't want to spend their money but they don't mind if others do for them. At least I make sure I do know who I am sending my information to. If they are serious about family history then they won't mind waiting and making sure. Irene

John makes reference to identity theft - a very important consideration. But before getting too paranoid, and I know that a number of contributors are concerned, it does need to be kept in perspective. Usually proof falls into two categories firstly something to identify who you are. A passport or driving licence are the most common - both of these in themeselves require you going through some sort of verification process before they are issued, and also carry a photograph. The second item of documentation concerns proof of where you live. Therfore a utility Bill or Bank Statement with your name and address on is often required. The need to produce two different types of document dramatically reduces, but will never altogether eliminate, fraudulent ID&V. On this basis it is unlikely that a member of G Reu would glean enough from simply a name on a family tree. Turning to other sources of information. The Electoral Roll - or more precisely some of the information contained in it - is in the public domain. However because the Data Protection Act has introduced new rules about using personal information for direct marketing, the rules regarding the use of it's infomation have been tightened up. Secondly the telephone directory. By agreeing to have your name and address in the directory you have effectively made it available to the world. At one time you could go to any public library and have access to evey name and address in the country listed in the directory. Now with the Internet, all you need to do is to go to www.bt*com. Click on Directory enquiries 'find a person' Enter your surname and town, or even first part of your postcode and you might be surprised what you see. It is as easy as that, and all perfectly legal. Peter

On the question of allowing someone to use my information in their own tree, I do not have a problem conceptually. If someone is genuinely releated I am happy for them to add my details in the same way as I would add theirs. What I would object to is quoting addresses emails or other such information. If on the other hand a person has no right to my information then I wouldn't let then see it in the first place, or if I was unhappy with how they used it, then I would ask them to remove it. I have never had the need to do this. Just once did I have an email asking me to remove information (not this site I might add and not even living persons) which I did and received a nice letter of thanks from the person concerned thanking me. Every one is entitled to their own view on this and I think we should respect peoples individual feelings. It would be just as wrong for G Reu to automatically blank all living persons as this would upset the 50% who want their details visible, but it could be included as an optional function. What G Reu could usefully do is to allow selective access for other members - not sure how this would be done, but it is worth thinking about. Peter

as it is over 2 years since I first put this message on I got a shock first of all thought I was doing things! in my sleep. However glad I looked in cos I think your Idea Alan of just sending a PDF short file is good. I dont spend as much time these days looking at boards but you do sometimes get very helpful hints. sandie