Genealogy Chat

I was contacted for the very first time (have been on since the begining of GC) by a GC member regarding my tree, I was so excited incase he had information that could help me in my quest. I quickly emailed him with the details and have yet to have a reply, I'm more than a bit peeved at this, why bother sending the email in the first place if he's not going to at least mail me again and say opps sorry no connection. Any one else had this happen? Vicky

I know the feeling. Perhaps they realise they cannot help you or you are not related but it does not take a minute to let you know. Then you will not be checking emails and notice boards all the time. I have helped people as well and on the whole they do reply but one or two do not. As my husband says everyone is different! Shirley.

Hi Vicky Yes it has happened many times to me and yes it is very annoying. Just a quick reply like you have mentioned would be nice. I know some of the emails i have sent and have not received replies from have kept me in suspense - wondering whether or not they are linked. A always reply to every email and you never know you may not see a direct link at that time but it may come later. Roseanne

hi vicky yes it happens often, nothing you can do really, sometimes i feel like e-mailing and asking why, but whats the point, just think of all the people that do help marcie x

Don't despair, they could have just gone on holiday! (that has happened to me recently) Or maybe they are having problems getting through (that happened to a friend on GC who was trying to contact someone I was having no problems getting in touch with- their mail was being returned!!) Write again and offer a hotmail account address if possible. That's how my friend sorted it! Best wishes Aileenx

That shout have read HOT-MAIL acct. ( the system threw it out!) Aileen

I was always think that it is courteous if people can get in touch even if it's just to let you know that they are going to be busy but will get back to you as soon as they can. It's the same if you're at work, and you tell a customer on the phone that you'll get back to him on Thursday with an answer for him/her. Thursday then comes around and you still don't have that answer and the customer becomes irritated when you don't phone him/her back on that day, as you promised. Easier to phone back when you said you would, tell them there's been a delay and that you'll update them on Monday. Whilst it might not be the news that the customer wants, they're at least being kept in the picture, which is always better than having no news at all.

Its happened to me a few times to, I think some people are just naturally thoughtless. Its the same when you try to help someone with a lookup request, ask for more information, and they never bother to reply. Or worse, you find all the information they've asked for, and they don't give any indication of whether or not they've bothered to read it. So annoying - if not downright rude. Jan.

I received an email this morning from a surname list I had forgotten all about. I couldn`t find a connection, though the area was the same, but the surname is quite a common one. I have, of course, replied to that effect and will keep the details, just in case.

There is another reason for people not replying, which happened to me once. A chap emailed me through gc about a possible connection. I replied with my details. A few days later, I get this rather shirty reply from his wife, saying how dare I contact her husband, he is a married man, I should be ashamed of myself, blah, blah, blah It does happen

Linda, I could understand it if I were too matey, but it was just a Hello, here are the names on my tree, and a list of names and dates. Just to be on the safe side, I now sign off with both my own and my husbands name.

Carol, How ridiculous! Think the wife concerned needs to get a life! When I email people regarding my tree,I don't even consider if they are male or female,they are just possible connections.

So do I Diane, but there is nothing as queer as folk. I get emails from male researchers all the time, and does my husband throw a wobbly? He is just glad I have a hobby that gives him some peace and quiet from my chattering.

Oh,well,takes all sorts I suppose. lol

Vicky I was contacted on here by someone that had connections with my lot, but he had no dates or areas when I looked, but he did give me a fw connectins on his email. I emailed him to say that we were connected, but only through marriage, (even though I seemed to have more info than him, looking through his names), but that is the last I heard from him. Did he think I had all the family? was I going to give him his whole tree? I sometimes wonder why some people do get in touch! are they looking for distant rellies complete with the whole lot or what? can anyone come up with an answer? Kim

My advice is to keep emailing them until they reply. If they are so ill-mannered they don't answer, the very least you can do is spam them! Crista

Carol, That's pretty funny about the wife. She must have only read as far as "Carol Bissett is interested in your tree." :-) Crista